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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Splitting restaurant bill

974 replies

idontwanttodothisanymore · 06/11/2017 14:37

I’m one of those people who like to pay for just my meal. I hate splitting the bill by how many people there are.

Me and DH went out with his friend and his OH the other day.

Mine and DH meal came to: £31.57
I had pizza and water, he had chicken and one coke.
DH friend and OH meal came to: £49.78
They had ribs, lasagne, chips and 3 drinks.

Final bill was £81.75
DH friend had two vouchers for £20 off, so they both used that.

Then the OH said we could pay the rest. So we ended up paying £41.75 - £10 more than our meal!!!

I had never met her before and was completely shocked that she wanted us to split by 4 when our meal was cheaper.
She was very intimidating anyway so I didn’t want to say anything.

We were going to do 2 bills but the waiter was all flustered so we said don’t bother. Regretting it now!

I know it’s only £10 but our circumstances are so different. They both work and she has one child - he works full time and she works part time. Whereas DH works part time (and overtime if there is any) but I don’t (I had to leave my job due to medically issues), and we have 2 children.

DH doesn’t think I should be annoyed but I really am!
AIBU to be annoyed?

I don’t think I’ll ever see her again anyway, I didn’t get a good vibe from her and she’s just not my kind of person at all.

OP posts:

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 11:53

Like I say I don’t care if you think I’m ‘the nastiest’ Blunt. Rebecca has been rude, intolerant, snobbish and downright nasty to several posters, i have no bad feelings for calling her a mean name

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 11:55

You're blissfully unselfaware aren't you?

Oh, sweet irony.

I’m officially disengaging with you now, aside from the fact that you’re being extremely thick rude at every point, the cognitive dissonance and making up crap twisting things is getting quite boring.

CoughLaughFart · 09/11/2017 11:56

Good old Mumsnet - where people lose their shit over the insults ‘bitch’ and ‘cunt’, but ignore how their behaviour led to them being used.

Rebeccaslicker · 09/11/2017 12:00

There's lots of names I could call cherry in return, but why bother when she does a simply superb job of showing what she is just by mashing her fists so furiously on her keyboard. If you want to insult people because you don't like their point of view, there are literally millions of words that aren't demeaning to women. I completely disagree with you that any behaviour merits propagating that sort of thing. As long as people think it's ok to insult people by referring to female anatomy, it will continue to be seen as ok.

And that's not really ok!

amicissimma · 09/11/2017 12:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OliviaStabler · 09/11/2017 12:07

@lightsON111

Olivia , that's interesting with the works meal, as are those arrangements set in stone then? Not being sarcastic just wondering, is it a huge faux pas for that poster to go along anyway but ask for their own bill?

I'd say it would be a faux pas. Whoever has set up the meal has picked the time, place etc and has clearly said that it is a split bill. To attend then only spring it on everyone at the end of the meal that you are only paying for what you had, will put a spanner in the works and a downer on the evening with faffing around with the bill. It would be a different matter if you discretely asked to pay for your own in advance of agreeing to attend however.

Bluntness100 · 09/11/2017 12:09

No one lost their shit, no one got upset about the term bitch., as far as I’m aware no one has even been called that. But let’s be frank it’s no where near as offensive as what was said. And yes. There is unpleasant behavuour on this thread, but it really doesn’t warrant that unacceptable response.

Cherry I didn’t say you were the nastiest, you may be lovely in real life, I said you were behaving the nastiest on the thread by calling someone that.

hotbutteredcrumpetsandtea · 09/11/2017 12:09

So effectively this would mean that my relative would never be able to go out for a meal with friends because they always have a 3 course meal with multiple bottles of wine and she only ever wants 2 courses and no alcohol at most

No it doesn't. Because if they are friends, all they have to do is talk about it amongst themselves and act like humans.

It's the asshats on this thread that would tell her to make sure she doesn't pay 60p for a share of the breadsticks that would ruin it for her.

CoughLaughFart · 09/11/2017 12:13

No one lost their shit, no one got upset about the term bitch., as far as I’m aware no one has even been called that.

There is more than one thread on MN you know.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 12:20

Who said everyone should fight to the death over 60p breadsticks there’s some mighty exaggerations going on in this thread

LadyinCement · 09/11/2017 12:30

I am going out to dinner this weekend with a couple I don't know very well. Now, what is the official consensus on what to do?!

Usually I think the conversation usually goes, "Are we having starters?" and it's either a yes or a no. Same with puddings. Then everyone is having a dinner in more or less the same price area, give or take a pound or three.

Now, this is where OP and Cherry and their ilk would start getting hot under the collar. How do I know if the couple I'm having dinner with are going to observe that their artisan pie and mash is 95p cheaper than my spatchcock chicken?

Now I'm nervous...

OtterInDisgrace · 09/11/2017 12:49

Not everyone shares the same view on the use of ‘cunt’ as a swear, you know.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3077135--to-think-it-is-profoundly-anti-feminist-to-use-the-word-cunt?msgid=73205862

Delatron · 09/11/2017 12:51

I think Lady like-minded people tend to dine together so enjoy the evening like you always have without worrying about the slight difference there can be across food prices. I've honestly never come across anybody ( in real life) who has said they are not happy to split the bill equally.

Obviously, as said about a million times on this thread, if one person is just having water/salad and the like then they pay less. Though my friends always protest and just insist on sharing. I was more than happy, when pregnant to carry on splitting equally, despite not drinking.

If they do just want to pay for their meal then i'm sure they'll speak up!

OtterInDisgrace · 09/11/2017 12:52

I’ll quite happily call people cunts if they deserve it, be they male or female. And there really has been some pretty cuntish behaviour on this thread, mainly from the ‘Splitters’ who seem really unpleasant.

OtterInDisgrace · 09/11/2017 12:55

I suspect there’s a bit of champagne lifestyle on a lemonade wage going on here

I’ve never heard that one before. I shall steal it forthwith

Bluntness100 · 09/11/2017 12:58

Good for you otter, that’s lovely.

Anyways, I think the two sides will never agree here on the best way to do it, so as long as everyone is happy with their choices, who cares.

user1467718508 · 09/11/2017 12:58

It's a sensitive issue for people this one isn't it!

My standout memory from a birthday meal a few years ago, is the cringe-worthy awkwardness at the end of the evening when one of the three couples reached for the bill and started totting up their share.

Myself, DP, and the other couple looked on trying to hide our bewilderment and then split the remainder in half. The difference between their meals and ours was so little, it was just petty to the point I wanted to go home and have done with the evening.

If it weren't my birthday I wouldn't have been so irked, but this is a childhood friend, whom I know to have a very comfortable income vs. mortgage, and no kids...I couldn't see at as anything other than penny pinching.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 13:29

ODFOD. That’s not what I’ve said at all. If you RTFT you’d see I said it’s IMO fine if everyone is ordering the same give or take a drink/starter/dessert.

So, everyone is in this business of making stuff up? Hurrah!

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 13:33

Bluntness there’s no ‘two sides’, I think most people have agreed that everyone should do what’s best for the group they’re out with at time. But I take exception with the twats on here who’ve said that people who can’t afford to pay more than what they’ve consumed shouldn’t go out in the first place, that people are inappropriate for ordering one course or a water, and that if you don’t want to pay for more than what you ate you are ‘tight as a duck’s arse’. It’s a snobbish cuntish attitude.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 09/11/2017 13:34

And I don’t agree that my use of cunt makes me anti-feminist.

Rebeccaslicker · 09/11/2017 13:36

Annnnd the human cappuccino is at it again. It's hilarious that you accuse other posters of "making stuff up" because you don't agree with them.

Twats AND cunts now? We've gone backwards again. It's like reading posts by Bernard manning or Roy chubby whatever his name is!

Only1scoop · 09/11/2017 13:42

That would be

Brown

Rebeccaslicker · 09/11/2017 13:45

I could only think of checker!

Only1scoop · 09/11/2017 13:46

Is it time to split the bill?

16.29 pence for lunch

33.3 pence each for the tip

Only1scoop · 09/11/2017 13:46

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