Fireworks at home - who should ‘win’?

[handsfree]

I love an organised display as much as the next person, but HATE fireworks at home. I think it’s dangerous, not nice for neighbours, not nice for pets, but mostly, it’s dangerous!!

Dh always had fireworks at home when he was a kid, it’s a very fond memory for him. He has just got back from work with a load of fireworks in his boot. We have two children, 6 and 3, and he is keen to put a display in in the garden for him. He knows how I feel about it but apparently thought I just ‘wasn’t a fan’ rather than being vehemently against it.

Now he’s saying why should he not get to do this as it’s a lovely memory for him just because I don’t like it (I didn’t actually say he couldn’t do it, just reiterated how strongly I feel about it) So we both feel very strongly about this but in completely opposite directions....... who gets to choose?!?

I’m with your DH, sorry!

Oh FFS, out come the whinyarses. Fireworks at home, if you have a big enough garden, are lovely and loads of fun. You can use your own loo, have your own snacks rather than paying well over the odds for a dodgy burger, your kids aren't whining for glow-in-the-dark tat and you don't have the hellish bus queues to get home.
Our garden isn't big enough, but we manage to miss out on most of the negative aspects of public shows because there's one literally at the end of our road...

A 4yo girl in the westcountry was injured badly by a firework at a home display last year and her mother is begging people to attend organised displays only. Her daughter suffered 3rd degree burns to her neck and hand and leg, when a firework went sideways and stuck in her scarf. It could have been so much worse than it was, but it was bad enough

I watched this, it’s harrowing. Show him the video, he will change his mind.

metro.co.uk/video/4-year-old-injured-rogue-firework-1553915/?ito=vjs-link

I'm with your DH on this. We put on burgers & hot dogs & have hot spices cider for the adults & Apple juice for the kids. Big bonfire with a guy as well . To be fair we do live in the middle of no where.

I wouldn't be happy either. Can the DC watch from the window?

Regardless of where they are set off, there is still a risk of injury. You just have to look at the news.
I remember when I was a kid going to a public display. That was the one and only one I ever went. Fireworks now scare the shit out of me, we only watch them from inside.

I think they should be banned for sale (perhaps with the exception of sparklers) unless they are for organised displays. I’m with you.

I work in an acute hospital with a trauma unit.

I would remove my children from the house, take them to a hotel for the night and leave him to it. I couldn’t give two shits about the ‘lovely memories’ some of you may have. The memories I’m left with as a result of backyard fireworks are fucking horrific.

I also agree that holding backyard displays are bloody selfish. It sounds like downtown Damascus around here around 5 Nov and New Year. Quite apart from my terrified children and dogs it’s a horrible thing to subject returned service people with possible PTSD to.

They should be banned.

I was hit in the face by the top of a rocket that did not take off properly when I was younger. Luckily it was the plastic bit and not the bit that was alight.

My 3 year old is terrified of them. My neighbours set them off lots over firework season. They know she is terrified and i hate them for doing it several times a week. Just because you can doesnt mean you should

Sparklers are dangerous as well. Every year they cause lots of injuries

My memories of fireworks at home is that they were always rather pathetic compared to a professional display. Why would I want to spend loads in a few rockets when I could spend a lot less to go to a much bigger display?

Just adding this. If you have a fireworks display at home, please consider if there are any stables or farms animals that maybe outside. People do tend to keep them in on 5th November, but if you don’t inform people they won’t know you are having a private display and may well not have their pets in.... please ask your DH to advertise his private display or do a door to door if he is having it another night that the 5th. (Although I am with you and think it’s v dangerous and unnessessary).

I am not keen but wouldn’t prevent my dh if he was dead set on it providing
A) the kids watch from inside
B) it’s actually on 5th when people expect it
C) smallish fireworks not stupidly loud

DP loves fireworks, as do I, but since our garden is now full of animals we can't have them.

What I've done this year is bought sparklers and powder to put on a normal fire which produces coloured flames. We have a fire pit at the bottom of the garden so that's all contained. Ok, so it's not as exciting as a proper 'do' but it keeps us happy.

We are going to a home display. Big big garden, kids behind French door for the firework bit. Then out for hotdogs round an enclosed fire. Would a compromise be possible here?

I was set alight by a firework at my friends garden display when I was 8 years old. I’m lucky(!) that my coat was undone and I could take it off, otherwise I would have been more severely burnt. As it is I still have 2 burn marks on my hand.

I agree with you. I'm not at all keen on fireworks in a garden.

I’m with your DH.. sorry!

As a child I knew someone who'd been seriously injured by a firework;
I feel very strongly that fireworks should only be allowed in organised displays.

I'd also like someone to explain why they're so loud? Surely it's not necessary; the noise scares small children & animals.

I am with you out of love for animals.

Hundreds of people are killed or seriously injured by fucking cars, yet the mere idea of using public transport more often to cut down on traffic accidents makes your average mundane shit themselves.
Yet mundanes' growing enthusiasm for watching everything rather than participating in anything or doing it at home is not confined to fireworks...

YANBU at all. "Fond memories" are not a good enough reason to endanger the lives of your family (and others around you).

Today 18:51 ReanimatedSGB
"Oh FFS, out come the whinyarses."

DFOD

The people saying fireworks at home are great etc etc,
What about those with PTSD or the elderly?
What about any neighbours with scared animals?
If you live next door to farms/horses etc do you actually let them know beforehand?

I am also with the DH.

What about the dogs? Do you know they bark all year which the neighbours hear, not just on one night like fireworks?

I do think there is an issue with buying massive fireworks for unsuitable gardens though, the mixed boxes are usually OK but it's possible to buy much bigger single fireworks than I remember as a kid!