To think 1 year old twins are bloody impossible?

[TammyswansonTwo]

Okay, when they were babies it was bloody hard. Like, going insane levels of hard. But at least I could bloody put them down and they'd stay where I put them.

They can't even walk yet and they're already driving me crazy. Let's recap:

• they have 1 x 20 minute nap a day

-one has figured out how to escape from their very expensive, should last til 2 bouncers

• got a very pricey big playpen which has saved me but now they've refused to stay in it, and have figured out how to gang up on it and prise it open
• they wait until I'm just starting to relax, or I'm busy changing the other and then they dart off in opposite directions - one attempting to pull the TV over, the other heading straight for the baby crusher (just kidding, I don't have a baby crusher but everything in the house is a potential baby crusher

Would a big dog cage be unreasonable?

Just kidding. But any suggestions that will stop me losing my mind. My vocab seems to have shrunk to their names, "stop it", "no" and muttering expletives.

Aww worth a try, good luck with the action plan

OP I feel your pain. No advice but massive solidarity!

It's when they can run in opposite directions that twin becomes hard. Age 1-3.
Do you have help? I had a student nursery nurse from the local college and also a local teenager who help at bedtime

No, no help at the moment - just me and DH. He does bedtimes now as I'm usually incoherent by then! I actually have no idea how we've made it this far and there are so many things I'm glad to see the back of, and I love them being more alert and interactive, but now they have opinions about things and know what they want even if they can't tell me! Bless them. Good job they're so blooming gorgeous and funny or I would have listed them on freecycle by now ;)

Hi OP I have three year old twins. I tried penning them in but they used to climb out / murder each other. I discovered that if you open up the room to them and just pen off the really dangerous stuff ( we had a fire) they will get bored of trying to pull the tv over / climb the coffee table. I also made myself a plan to get through the day if certain things to do to keep them eternally occupied. Best thing was finding a toddler group local and buying reins so I could even just walk them to the park and back again to wear them out a bit. Have you got. Garden I also used to put wellies / boots / coats on and let them run up and down ours for a bit when I got a bit cabin fever . Your doing a great job twins are really hard work! X

I think that health problems not withstanding if you cold get them to nap more life would be easier and they would sleep better at night.

When mine were one I tried t consolidate them to one nap a day in the cot. That was a joke.

I resigned myself to pounding the streets to get them to sleep for an hour and a half or chucking them in the car (which I realise you can't do).

They HAD to sleep or the rest of the day was hell. And the nights.

It does get better - from 3 onwards things got easier and now at 6 they are a delight even though there are still challenges, everyones had enough sleep, they can play together nicely, not wreck stuff the minute your back is turned, holidays are fab now not the same shit different location of when they are small.

Sorry just saw they are not walking yet !! When Mine weren’t I wrapped them up and took them for long walks. It was a distraction for them ! X

Best thing we ever had was a huge playpen. Chucked them both in there for a time with some toys they hadn't seen for a while/borrowed from the toy library - and had a few minutes peace.

It does get easier. and eventually they leave home and go to university

I had a very tall and destructive DS so we used 3 opened out baby Dan pens as protectors of stuff like the TV. It effectively made the living room into a giant pen with the TV cordoned off and other unsafe bits. A pain for anyone of normal height but got me through the day. I had about 6 normal stair gates across doorways too.
I feel for you op. Try and throw some £ at it. Your sanity is worth it

My twin boys were 6 last night and I have another wee boy who is going to be 2 at Christmas. I didn't have magic answers but if it helps I found the baby bit easier than the 1 - 2 bit. Other than the constant feeding and changing they do at least stay in the same place, roughly anyway. I found going places where they could toddle safely without reins or needing the pram was all I could manage. That and I went to a twins playgroup and now have 3 other bestie twin mum pals who I can share my woes too and drink lots of alcohol 😉. Every year brings new twin challenges but the sheer relentless of that first toddler stage is definitely behind me 😁😁

Wah! I feel your frustration OP. When my twins were that age I remember gettung them out of the buggy in the middle of a huge park thinking: this has to be safe. One ran towards the canal, the other in the opposite direction towards a main road. Whichever one I'd caught, by the time I'd urned around the other one would be in danger.
But they're still alive.

I used to take them out of the house a lot to places where there were other people - playgroups, library story telling etc as there'd usually be an extra adult around to scoop one up if I was dealing with the other.

Get in touch with local college and find out if anyone on the child care course could help out a couple of hours a week

Yes, I will be checking in with my local college, definitely. I so want to be a good and happy mum but more often than not I'm grouchy and shouty because I'm so bloody stressed!

Oh good lord Milli - you just described my actual recurrent nightmare! Poor you, that's awful!

I went to an event recently that was listed as "baby friendly". It was an NHS workshop thing. I turned up, they told me to park my buggy in a side room and then go up to the second floor where the workshop was. Riiiight. Someone helped me carry them upstairs and then deposited me in a room crammed with people, low tables with board games on them and tea and coffee everywhere.

Luckily there was one sofa in the room and a very kind woman I've met through work wrangled one while I rangled the other. After a while they both passed out and I could lay them on the sofa, but when they woke up I had to leave. I'm a bit scared to take them anywhere else! Going to soft play with some other twins tomorrow though.

I feel for you, things that helped me were driving around a lot (unless I so so tired I thought I would crash the car), I know you don't drive but if you can take any car trips with another person.

Long pushchair rides, my fitness has never been as good as it was then, pushing that pushchair everywhere.

The gym because it came with a crèche.

The ball pit of doom, a small play pen filled with lots of plastic balls, yes they threw them everywhere but they didn't damage anything.

One room in the house stripped out.

I also went back to work at 14 months for three days a week, I think it cost more in childcare fees than I earned but I didn't care. I enjoyed my work and I loved my lunch break so much.
Good luck

Tammy (love your username btw ) you get used to it. You get strategic - I remember making a split second decision that I'd go after the faster one first because he could cover more ground, so I did, and got to the canal one just before he got onto the tow path.

Friend had to ditch gate for her at play pen and she ended up bolting it to floor and wall to stop them tag team escaping

I can remember babysitting my brothers twins as a teenager when they were at the age of crawling. I can remember siting in the middle of their tiny flat holding onto each twin by an ankle since one of them was wanting to put his hands in the electric bar fire and the other wanted to eat from the cat's food bowl. I have two 13 months apart, my brother and sil watched them once and declared it worse than twins but I think they'd just forgotten since their DC were in their 20 by the time I had mine.

When my twins were little (now teenagers) we only had one living room and just made it as childproof as possible, so attach everything to a wall that you possibly can and remove as many large or dangerous things as you can. Toddler twins work surprisingly well together and there have been some serious accidents involving twins, including a pair who pulled a TV onto themselves and a pair where they managed to open the drawers on a very heavy cabinet and use them as stairs. We actually put another piece of furniture in front of the TV so it couldn't fall. Our house looked ridiculous, but much of the time there was just me so safety was all important.
I did have a student once a fortnight and a lovely homestart lady once a fortnight for a brief time so highly recommend that too

yes to reins and screwing furniture to the wall and using your playpen to exclude DC from certain areas (e.g. put the gates around the fireplace).
You could also advertise with local kids to "play" with the cute twins so you get to pee in peace every once in a while.

My dts are 7 now, it's so bloody easy. Obviously there are challenges but it's mostly plain sailing.
I agree with anyone who suggested baby proofing as much as you can and using gates for other areas. My 2 had free range of the living room, hall and dining room because I knew the worst they could do was fall off furniture or empty toy boxes.

We baby proofed half the living room and rigged up a permanent partition of playpen/stair gate when ours were that age! Is that an option for you? It definitely gets easier, keep going OP!

milli I think you're the first person to notice the username. She's fantastically evil 😂

Thanks so much everyone, for giving me hope it will get easier... one day! We are going to come up with a proper babyproofing plan this weekend. I will definitely get a strap to attach the tv to the wall and a low coffee table that can go in front of it... unless they team up and get on top of it, then we are all fucked. Sigh.

I so miss the days of putting them down and them staying there. Why did I complain so much then?!

Tammy are you a member of TAMBA? They might be able to help if Homestart don't have anyone.

Can you fence off a safe part of the room using panels from a big play pen? I've done this in my kitchen and have also fenced off the woodburning stove in our living room so that we can use the fire (although I haven't yet lit the fire when the babies are around).

It will get easier xxx

Wait until they’re in single beds and not cots.

That’s when the fun really starts.

On a serious note, mine were great from 3 onwards. Not so much when you go on days out with your older 2 kids and then all 4 run in opposite directions though!