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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How can you NOT get onto a motorway?

382 replies

purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 22:15

I have driven on motorways for many years and avaerge 15,000 miles some years as I drive for work. I consider myself a very confident yet safe driver. I have experience driving lorries and an extended professional license.

Never in my 20+ years of driving have I had trouble getting onto a motorway...

Yet my friend told me today that she was not able to join a motorway today, that she matched with speed of traffic but there were 'no gaps.' She got stranded at the end of the slip road, DC in car, and ended up getting a vehicle recovery service to come out and get her car as she was too scared to move onto the motorway from a stop.

She says it was not her fault and that this was not due to fault of her driving.

However I can't see how you could fail to get onto a motorway if you were merging correctly?

I've always matched my speed with the traffic, indicated right, ended up on carriageway. If the traffic is slower, you still match your speed! My guess is she want too fast or slow. Yet she insisted this was not her fault.

So AIBU to not see how a safe and competent driver can get stranded at the end of a slip road? And AIBU to ask if this has ever happened to anyone/ if they've witnessed it?

I personally never have in all my years of driving.

Friend has been driving for ten plus years. I did mention that this shouldn't happen and that it was very dangerous, but I wasn't harsh or rude.

Thank you.

OP posts:
ghostyslovesheets · 31/10/2017 23:08

you have to judge the speed of traffic already there and in the left hand lane and adjust accordingly - so if it's a lorry you either have space to speed up and slip in front ot slow down and slip behind depending on the position

I feel for your friend but I encountered a similar driver recently and I almost got totalled - I had joined - he was continuing to race down the slip road - at the very end he realised he didn't have time to get in from of a lorry (I think he did but he panicked) so he slammed his breaks on then swerved in front of me causing me to break and the lorry behind me to almost hit me - and beep and shout at me - both a pair of silly sods really!

Original poster
purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 23:09

If the road is gridlocked, that's different obviously. You can't merge if the traffic is at standstill.

I believe my friend got to the end and was on the hard shoulder. She then stopped completely and was too scared to try going from 0-60 mph. In an older car this would easily take at least seven seconds and I guess there was no gap big enough. I presume the recovery vehicle literally had to stop on the hard shoulder itself and take her car away. Although if the recovery vehicle- and most recovery vehicles- managed to get off the hard shoulder, then it's not impossible.

If you genuinely can't get onto the motorway, there are two feasible options: continue along hard shoulder (with the danger of crashing into someone using the hard shoulder for it's intended purpose, emergencies!) or stop at the slip road give way Lind and try and join again from a stop (which is also very dangerous and causes danger to those behind you as well.)

Which is the lesser of the two evils?

From reading people's replies it seems to happen, then.

Ideally one should look for a gap as soon as you get onto the slip road and join ASAP. Don't be one of those people who gets to the end after making no effort to earlier and then seems surprised there's no space. And the biggest thing- match the speed of the traffic. Technically this should mean you get on okay, but clearly it does happen more than I thought, especially if people are twats on the motorway in the left hand lane.

Whilst driving artic lorries, you still get people who drive idiotically. People suddenly overtaking whilst two lanes merge to one, for example, as they don't want to get stuck behind me. A lorry is massive and can do so much damage, you'd think people would be more careful. Yet this is not the case.

And also you get idiotic lorry drivers as well. I like to think I'm not one of them but I've come across them.

I feel more vulnerable in a lorry than a car as in a lorry I'm aware than an accident would cause so much more damage due to the sheer size and weight.

OP posts:
Longdistance · 31/10/2017 23:10

Not being able to join the motorway like that is pathetic. Sorry to be harsh, but they shouldn’t have a driving licence if they can’t do the simplist if manoeuvres.

Fancy calling out a recovery vehicle to help 🙄

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/10/2017 23:11

The only time I had trouble was when a bunch of trucks were nose-to-tail when I was coming off the slip road and none of them would move into the middle lane. As taught by my driving instructor, I used the hard shoulder slowly for about half a mile until I could nip in. It was a fucking nightmare and quite nerve wracking

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 31/10/2017 23:11

I've never had a problem in the UK, but I've had a few hair-raising moments since I moved back to Ireland. Mostly the issue is one driver being hesitant and slow, so the top speed on the motorway is 120 kph and the hesitant driver might only get to 75 kph by the time they are nearing the end of the slip which causes other cars to bunch behind them on the slip. It's hard to merge five or six bunched-up, slow-moving cars into a lane of faster moving traffic.

I was pretty sure that I was going to die in a fiery ball the time that I went whizzing down a slip road that was quite short and fairly blind until near the time you join, only to find there was a funeral cortege (WTF?) doing about 60 kph. The mourners were all bunched up together too, they were definitely well below the stopping distance they needed and I really thought I wouldn't be able to merge but lined myself up with a (tiny) gap anyway. Fortunately one mourner slowed down a little and I fitted in.

Littlefuckers · 31/10/2017 23:11

Sometimes you have no choice but to stop and accelerate like fuck when you finally get a gap. The last 15years of my commute and it's got harder and harder to get on to dual carriage way at speed. Very short slip road, and considerably more traffic.

PoppyPopcorn · 31/10/2017 23:13

ended up getting a vehicle recovery service to come out and get her car as she was too scared to move onto the motorway from a stop

But definitely not her driving at fault, right? Hmm

I'm with you OP, i have driven thousands of miles on motorways over the years and have never had this problem, whether on the M25 at rush hour or the M74 in the middle of the night. Your friend sounds like she could do with refresher lessons or motorway lessons with a professional instructor as panicking and having to be rescued indicates she doesn't know what she is doing, is a ditherer, and quite frankly a danger to other road users parked up at the end of the slip road.

Migraleve · 31/10/2017 23:13

I'm a very experienced driver, and I drive on the M1 every working day.

Experience doesn't equal good.....

Sometimes, when traffic is very heavy and the HGVs are nose-to-tail in lane 1, it can be difficult to join the motorway. In this case, you should continue to drive down the hard shoulder until a gap appears

No. No. No. No. No

You should never, ever stop as this could be very dangerous.

YOU SHOULD NOT DRIVE ON THE HARD SHOULDER

Your friend was lucky not to be charged with careless driving.

Ditto.

StealthPolarBear · 31/10/2017 23:16

"
Ideally one should look for a gap as soon as you get onto the slip road and join ASAP. Don't be one of those people who gets to the end after making no effort to earlier and then seems surprised there's no space. And the biggest"
Did you just want to post your instructions for us all?

PoppyPopcorn · 31/10/2017 23:19

It sounds like OP's friend expected all the traffic in lane 1 to pull into lane 2 to allow her a clear space to join the motorway. Now that does sometimes happen - if there is space to allow it to happen. But if there's not, you judge speed and space and go for it, you don't sit there with your indicator on waiting as if you were at a junction. Really poor driving on the part of the friend.

Shadow666 · 31/10/2017 23:20

I saw this happen once. I was driving down the slip road, picking up speed, and then just as I was getting towards the end, I realised the car in front had stopped dead at the end of the slip road. There was no time for me to stop so I just had to swerve around it and join the motorway. It scared the pants off me! And was the closest I've ever come to having a serious accident.

Sagethyme · 31/10/2017 23:22

legally if there is a constant stream of traffic and you can't move onto the dual carriageway or motorway the you MUST STOP, and wait for a gap.

RB68 · 31/10/2017 23:25

Mostly because people on the motorway are driving way too close to each other and if they see someone trying to merge they speed up the fuckers

Original poster
purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 23:28

I wasn't posting instructions as such, I was just typing out what I was thinking and that's how I join a motorway, so I guess I just wanted to see if that's the norm. And people were saying I could be a twattish driver earlier, so I guess the only way I can convince people I'm not is by trying to show that I do merge safely...

Those people who are talking about lorries leaving no gaps then that is extremely twattish behaviour on the lorry drivers part. Obviously in a lorry you can't move over to the right to make things easier, even in low traffic, but lorry drivers should still leave a safe gap so that a car should be able to merge.

OP posts:
Ollivander84 · 31/10/2017 23:28

I've had one incident where I tried to join, spotted a gap and matched speed. The car blocked me and matched my speed. Didn't allow me to join, didn't move over. Seemed to be either deliberate or oblivious

Original poster
purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 23:32

I agree people drive too closely on motorways these days. My DH does it sometimes and the anount of fights we've had caused by him driving too closely- IMO anyway- has been quite a few. Quite frankly I don't like him driving, EVER.

OP posts:
Stormzy · 31/10/2017 23:34

God, I don't think I ever want to pass my test. All this sounds bloody terrifying Confused

QuestionableMouse · 31/10/2017 23:34

I've had to stop on a slip road before. An absolute tosser decided to match my speed and block me from getting out. I could see him laughing at me.

Haffiana · 31/10/2017 23:38

Yes, I have nearly had an accident caused by someone in front of me stopping on a slip road. Not just me but the cars behind me on the slip road all had to swerve and drive extremely dangerously because of that one idiot.

To the jobsworth pp who thinks that the correct answer is NEVER to drive on the hard shoulder - I can assure you that you are wrong. A driver must be prepared to assess the road conditions and take what action is safest to themselves and other drivers rather than slavishly follow a rule that cannot account for all driving conditions.

soapboxqueen · 31/10/2017 23:46

Haffiana As someone who had never heard this 'rule' about driving on the hard shoulder before this thread, I've been looking very hard for anything that would confirm this. I can't find anything other than it being illegal unless it is an emergency or the police instruct you to. If you know of where in the highway code this is described as a legitimate action I'd be pleased to read it.

Carouselfish · 31/10/2017 23:47

Picka god forbid you slow down on a blind corner on a windy country lane (which are rarely wide enough for two cars). There are people who live there, walking their dogs, pushing a buggy, rabbits, pheasants, deer, sometimes farm dogs, tractors, bicycles...
Can you tell I live on one and am sick of people thinking just because it's got stretches of national speed limit that anyone with half a brain would think doing 60 was a good idea?

Migraleve · 31/10/2017 23:48

To the jobsworth pp who thinks that the correct answer is NEVER to drive on the hard shoulder - I can assure you that you are wrong.

I can’t even work out how he description ‘jobsworth’ could apply here Confused

That aside, you don’t drive on the fucking hard shoulder when joining a motorway. EVER.

You can ‘assure’ all you like, but until you come up with some sort of evidence that trumps the Highway Code, your assurances mean jack shit

Haffiana · 31/10/2017 23:54

soapboxqueen there is no rule that says you should. However if it is a choice between causing immediate danger to other users of the slip road by stopping, and causing possible danger to hypothetical broken down vehicles on the hard shoulder then the choice is obvious.

Original poster
purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 23:56

It's been many years since I've been in law, so please take this with a pinch of salt, but technically the dotted line on the slip road is a give way line.

And it's also illegal to drive on the hard shoulder.

So I suppose LEGALLY you should wait at the give way line, ie, the end of the slip road.

I'm not saying this is safe but I don't think either option is safe.

And again, this could be incorrect.

Ideally, it shouldn't happen, and I also agree that different people will take different outcomes. I can see how driving along the hard shoulder might feel 'safer'at the time but if you suddenly came across an accident or break down it would be so dangerous

OP posts:
soapboxqueen · 01/11/2017 00:07

Haffiana It's illegal and dangerous to drive on the hard shoulder. Afaik the give way at the end of the slip road means that you should stop there not drive illegally on the hard shoulder. Now obviously the highway code expects you to match speed and join the traffic without stopping. However, if there truely is no way onto the motorway the cars behind wouldn't have a way on either.

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