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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How can you NOT get onto a motorway?

382 replies

purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 22:15

I have driven on motorways for many years and avaerge 15,000 miles some years as I drive for work. I consider myself a very confident yet safe driver. I have experience driving lorries and an extended professional license.

Never in my 20+ years of driving have I had trouble getting onto a motorway...

Yet my friend told me today that she was not able to join a motorway today, that she matched with speed of traffic but there were 'no gaps.' She got stranded at the end of the slip road, DC in car, and ended up getting a vehicle recovery service to come out and get her car as she was too scared to move onto the motorway from a stop.

She says it was not her fault and that this was not due to fault of her driving.

However I can't see how you could fail to get onto a motorway if you were merging correctly?

I've always matched my speed with the traffic, indicated right, ended up on carriageway. If the traffic is slower, you still match your speed! My guess is she want too fast or slow. Yet she insisted this was not her fault.

So AIBU to not see how a safe and competent driver can get stranded at the end of a slip road? And AIBU to ask if this has ever happened to anyone/ if they've witnessed it?

I personally never have in all my years of driving.

Friend has been driving for ten plus years. I did mention that this shouldn't happen and that it was very dangerous, but I wasn't harsh or rude.

Thank you.

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 31/10/2017 22:43

What did the recovery driver actually do? Was she at the end of the slip road or the hard shoulder?

SheepyFun · 31/10/2017 22:43

Round here we have a 3 lane (in each direction) A road, with rubbish slip roads and no hard shoulders. Sometimes there's no slip road at all, just a T junction type entrance - I drive an alternative route to avoid that where possible. But I've had to join said road a fair few times from a standing start - one reason why we have a fairly powerful car. It isn't much fun. So I can understand why you might not be able to join a motorway, though they usually have much better slip roads (and hard shoulders).

kaitlinktm · 31/10/2017 22:45

The Highway Code tells you to carry on driving on the hard shoulder at the appropriate speed until a gap appears...you should never stop

I thought this too - but a few years ago my friend carried on on the hard shoulder and was stopped by the police and told off. I am sure she said that they told her she should have stopped.

Ttbb · 31/10/2017 22:45

YANBU. When there are no 'gaps' you slow down at the beginning if the slip and wait for an opportunity instead of just dawdling along to the very end expecting people to move out of your way. If the traffic is heavy then matching your speed and trying to merge as soon as possible so that you have extra room if people are being ducks usually does the trick.

RavingRoo · 31/10/2017 22:46

Sounds like your friend needs driving lessons. She could have been killed - all of the fatalities at my local slip road are caused by drivers who stop unecessarily.

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 31/10/2017 22:48

SilverSpot “Some dipshit in front of me came to a stop at the end of a slip road a few months ago.”

“Dipship” Hmm maybe there was a reason they stopped? Unless you can see what they could see, you have no idea. If you’d crashed into them, it would have been your fault.

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 31/10/2017 22:48

DipShit!

Collaborate · 31/10/2017 22:49

My guess is she was driving far too slowly. Too many people make no effort to match the speed of the prevailing traffic and simply expect the vehicles on the carriageway to part for them like the Red Sea. I travel 80 motorway miles each day and little gets my goat as much as some muppet in front of me on the slip road who pootles along at 50 to join a motorway doing 70. It’s bloody dangerous not just for the slow driver, (who should steer clear of motorways until they get more confidence), but for the other road users too.

Original poster
purplecurtaindog · 31/10/2017 22:49

Nope, wasn't with my friend but she phoned me this evening and told me everything, she wanted to know if she had 'done something wrong' and described the road conditions and all. She wanted my advice as my job is technically being a "professional driver" although that sounds much too posh Grin In reality I drive big trucks and drop stuff off whilst also doing a lot of waiting around and a whole lot of nothing during the waiting around... Wink

Like I said I told her it sounded like she had been hesitant and that she should not have stopped but I wasn't overly harsh and was also sympathetic to her.

For those wondering, I used to be in the police force and we used to get a lot of call outs to RTA's on a busy stretch of motorway. I left the police force some years ago and now part of my job involves driving articulated lorries. I feel confident driving the lorries but would still choose a car any day over them.

For what's it worth, I understand how terrifying motorway driving can be. I've had incidences with my DD when she decided to go out on the motorway during rush hour two weeks after passing her driving test. She was nervous but did it anyway and came home in tears after a near miss caused by her being far too insecure and not ready. After that incident I told her she had to either pay for motorway driving lessons or not be able to share my car with me. She's had those lessons now and I think she's safer and confident for it.

Different subject, but I think that the motorway element of the driving test is horribly insufficient. Yet at the same time the idea of learner drivers on the motorway terrifies me! So how are people supposed to learn without being a danger?

OP posts:
PurpleMinionMummy · 31/10/2017 22:51

Last time I went on a motorway it was a free for all. It utterly does my head in. Middle lane hoggers when the inside lane is empty, people under taking left right and centre (probably due to said lane hoggers I suppose!). It was chaos and sometimes people are just plain bloody minded and won't move over despite being able to do so to make it easier for those trying to join, especially when it is busy.

Insomnibrat · 31/10/2017 22:52

No. i've never had to stop but I have had a few 'FUCKING MOVE!!!' close calls Grin

nocoolnamesleft · 31/10/2017 22:52

The highway code states that you should NOT use the hard shoulder.

www.gov.uk/guidance/the-highway-code/motorways-253-to-273

Probably because people driving along the hard shoulder kills people stopped on the hard shoulder. (Which, incidentally, is why if you do break down, you get the hell out of the car, and as far onto the verge as humanly possible)

PickAChew · 31/10/2017 22:54

I've seen the A1(M) near the metrocentre be so busy you have to grind to a halt or, as the junctions allow ("slow" lane isn't continuous), continue and leave again at the next exit, but there's usually someone who takes pity and lets you in, even at Christmas.

I reckon she panicked.

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 31/10/2017 22:55

“Highway Code
Joining the motorway (259)

259
Joining the motorway.
When you join the motorway you will normally approach it from a road on the left (a slip road) or from an adjoining motorway. You should

give priority to traffic already on the motorway
check the traffic on the motorway and match your speed to fit safely into the traffic flow in the left-hand lane
not cross solid white lines that separate lanes or use the hard shoulder
stay on the slip road if it continues as an extra lane on the motorway
remain in the left-hand lane long enough to adjust to the speed of traffic before considering overtaking”

From the Highway Code.

First rule is to give priority to the traffic already on the motorway. So if it is busy and no one moves over, you must stop.

soapboxqueen · 31/10/2017 22:55

Can somebody point to the bit in the highway code that says you're supposed to drive on the hard shoulder rather than stop? I've never heard of this nor seen anyone ever do it. Not that it would help round here as we don't have them.

Migraleve · 31/10/2017 22:55

Joining a busy motorway is not always easy, but for fuck sake calling a recovery truck is an absolute pisstake. Your friend is bloody dangerous and should get herself some further lessons before she drives alone again. I have never heard such a ridiculous driving story!

GabsAlot · 31/10/2017 22:57

u can stop if u hav to but calling the aa? a wast and just dangrous to othr traffic and herslf

if shs having panic attacks sh shold sort that out before driving again

GetOutOfMYGarden · 31/10/2017 22:57

I've had to stop before, but it's because the motorway I was moving onto was gridlocked. There was no gap because nothing was moving.

Otherwise, you have to be confident that the people on the motorway really don't want to crash either.

problembottom · 31/10/2017 22:59

I've never come close to stopping on a slip road, that sounds highly dangerous and I think your DF must be at least partly to blame. Tell her never to drive somewhere like Italy, the slip roads over here are pretty generous in comparison.

Solina · 31/10/2017 22:59

Really there should never be a need to stop. She must have either been too slow or too hesitant.

I love slip roads as it is the one time that makes me feel like a rally driver speeding up and changing gears pretty fast to match the speed of everyone else. Few seconds of joy there... Hate it when people just drive down the slip road doing 40 and only speed up once they manage to merge onto the motorway Angry

problembottom · 31/10/2017 23:00

Should add, I obviously stop when traffic is at a standstill on the motorway but at other times, absolutely not.

PickAChew · 31/10/2017 23:01

Our usual journey is windy country roads and the most frustrating drivers to follow are the ones who hit their brakes on every bend - and there are a lot of them.

SIL never left her home town in years because she could drive around that without going near a roundabout.

There are many threads on here criticising non drivers, but i think there are any people who would be better off getting over their fear of slightly smelly people and walking and not driving.

Ontheboardwalk · 31/10/2017 23:01

I find it harder to exit the slip road where the limit is set at 50 for non existent roadworks, I think it's because it's more difficult to change and regulate your speed when everyone is so concerned about average speed cameras.

It also annoys me when people move into the left hand lane actually at slip roads. Again I think it's because of the average speed cameras

BonnieF · 31/10/2017 23:02

I'm a very experienced driver, and I drive on the M1 every working day.

Sometimes, when traffic is very heavy and the HGVs are nose-to-tail in lane 1, it can be difficult to join the motorway. In this case, you should continue to drive down the hard shoulder until a gap appears. You should never, ever stop as this could be very dangerous.

Your friend was lucky not to be charged with careless driving.

BriechonCheese · 31/10/2017 23:02

Christ what do you do if there is no hardshoulder? I'm thinking of the likes of bridges or going under the Stockport viaduct on the M60 which is incredibly tight and has a short slip road.