To feel a bit pissed off at being given concert tickets?

[Zoeylee]

I know it sounds mad, and I hate myself for thinking this. However, my brother and SIL have given me concert tickets for my birthday, (2 tickets actually, so me and DH can go.) It's for someone I do like (and have done for years.)

Problem is, we are very rural. We are literally 45 to 50 minutes drive from a train station, and the city where the concert is, is another HOUR and a QUARTER journey on the train. (Including having to change trains half way.)

So we are talking about starting out a MINIMUM of 3 hours before the concert starts, as it says on the tickets that the doors open at 6.00pm and it's advisable to get there early. The concert starts with a support act at 7pm... To enable ourselves to get the last train back would involve leaving the concert at 9pm. The main act will probably only just be starting then.

Either that or we stay in a travelodge or premier inn. I have already looked at the date, and because it's a Friday, the cheapest room is £85! This would be on top of the train fares that will cost £70 for the two! So with food and extra bits and bobs, we could be looking at £200.

Driving would be a PITA too, as that would take the best part of two and a half to three hours (five to six hour round-trip,) and would be a ballache, with driving in and around a major city, and car parking and suchlike.

WIBU to sell the tickets on and buy something else? Should I pretend we went to the concert and fake a few photos? Or should I be honest? I feel like such a cow, but these 'free tickets' are going to end up costing us a bleeding fortune! And the thought of all the hassle involved in travelling to this concert, and back (even though I like the act,) is giving me a headache. My brother and SIL meant well, but I don't think they thought it through.

@ruralgigmadness

The OP made it very clear she didn't want to go.

TBH the OP sounds pretty horrible. She has responded in pretty angry fashion to lots of other posters who are only trying to help her. I hope she manages a bit more charm and grace when explaining to her DB why she doesn't want her gift.

I realise that, that's why I said I'd just flog them if the effort isn't worth the return.

rural, you went to Bangkok for a concert?

Was it a private jet and did you sing "One Night in Bangkok" en route?

oh no, I've given myself an earworm now.

In your shoes, I'd just drive there and back, and I regularly do for similar (we're remote rural too - when gigs are in our closest city it's a 3.5hr drive each way.)

More often we go to a bigger venue that's 5.5hrs drive away, and then we do stay in a hotel overnight.

But if you don't actually want to go, I think the nice response suggested by melj at 16:02 yesterday is fine.

PS rural I know you're going to say you made a holiday out of it but not everyone can afford that or wants to do that kind of thing.

Not read the thread!
Try b&bs, usually cheaper than Travelodge / Premier Inn.

And now I have read the thread I realise my previous post was a waste of time 😂

I think the OP is off on a diplomatic mission and won’t be back.

YABU your brother obviously knew you liked the band and thought you’d be thrilled to get tickets. And concert tickets are expensive.

And they are not playing at the stadium closer to your house, so it’s not an option.

I think you can’t be assed going and want an excuse.

Pretending you went to your brother is WRONG and he will find out one way or another and be very hurt. I think you should sell the tickets or tell him to get a refund if you really don’t want to go.

You knew before moving to a rural area that it was going to be far to travel to the city, events and such and you made that choice.

My sister us d to pull stuff on me like this and now I don’t buy her presents anymore because she just returns everything I get.

The two questions that occur to me are;

Do you live in northern Scotland

And

Do you like going on holiday

Oh and an slightly interested in who the gig is.

That's all. I know I won't get an answer as the op has long gone.

Sheep "You knew before moving to a rural area that it was going to be far to travel to the city, events and such and you made that choice"

Um, doesn't this make the gift even more poorly chosen?

I'm sorry if I misunderstood but it comes across to me that you are saying to OP she foolishly hadn't realised the consequences of living rurally. But she didn't request concert tickets in the city, nor is she moaning about wanting to go. The issue is that she doesn't want to go and doesn't want to upset her rellies by saying it was a silly gift

TBH the OP sounds pretty horrible. She has responded in pretty angry fashion to lots of other posters who are only trying to help her. I hope she manages a bit more charm and grace when explaining to her DB why she doesn't want her gift

This.

@slimthistime

I'm sorry if I misunderstood but it comes across to me that you are saying to OP she foolishly hadn't realised the consequences of living rurally. But she didn't request concert tickets in the city, nor is she moaning about wanting to go. The issue is that she doesn't want to go and doesn't want to upset her rellies by saying it was a silly gift

Agree with @slim What kind of fucked up logic do some people have?!

Dear sister.....

"I got you some tickets for a concert (that you didn't ask for - but I know you will love because you like the band,) that will take a 5 hour round trip to get to and from. It will involve an hour's drive to the train station, a 3 hour round trip back on the train (that changes trains part way,) and then an hour back from the station to your house when you get back to the station.

By the way, you will need to leave before the actual band comes on stage, or you won't make the train connection. OR you can book a hotel that will probably cost a hundred quid as it's the weekend.

Problem? Going to cost you around £250 in train fares, taxis, food, and hotel bills? Tough shit, you chose to move to the sticks you fucking ungrateful twat.

Now take the bastard tickets and quit whingeing, I heard you say you like this band at least twice, so suck it up, and get a backpack, and fill it with cheese sarnies, crisps, blue riband bars, and some pop, and a flask of coffee, and make a weekend of it, (in a city you never wanted to go to, to see a band you never asked to see.)

If you don't I will assume you are a horrible ungrateful cunt and will never buy you fuck-all again."

Your brother.

p.s. You could fucking drive there too. It's only 5 to 6 hours there and back in the car. Loads of people do it all the time, and there are 1000's of free parking spaces when there is a concert in a major city at a major venue, and you will have no problem finding a space. You won't have to pay for the car park either, as they are all free. In fact, I think most cities don't charge to park now.

And think how lovely it will be driving there in the rush hour with 100's of 1000's of other people, and how delightful it will be driving back in the wee small hours, after nearly 10 hours of being out and driving through the rush hour and battling 1000's of people to get back to the car.

Still, you should be grateful you got the tickets, you nasty fucking ungrateful arse."

(Upshot is, many people on here are talking utter bollocks, and clearly have no clue about what it's like to live rural.)

I've been the recipient of some free tickets and paid for some too when people have been unable to make a venue at short notice. The days have involved travel, time, effort and some extra costs. However all were worth the effort and so much better in reality compared to TV or Internet. However some people enjoy their home comforts. I would suggest giving or selling tickets to someone who would appreciate the experience

Slim - I DO live rurally and my nearest major hospital is 6 hours drive as is my dentist. The nearest GP is 3 hours drive. If she can't be fagged to go for god sake don't go and give the tickets away to someone who would love it. 50 minutes from a railway station isn't exactly extreme rural.

@pilotswife

Slim - I DO live rurally and my nearest major hospital is 6 hours drive as is my dentist. The nearest GP is 3 hours drive. If she can't be fagged to go for god sake don't go and give the tickets away to someone who would love it. 50 minutes from a railway station isn't exactly extreme rural.

Cool story bro.

Good for you. Give yourself a pat on the back for being a trouper and trekking a 12 hour trip to the dentist, whoop whoop.

99% of the UK don't go more than 20-30 minutes drive to their dentist though, ya know that don't ya?!

Now go take off your martyr badge it's time for bed.

Unless you can't be 'fagged' to do it of course PMSL.

Little tip though hun, not everyone is the same, and it doesn't make them wrong or bad if they don't want travel 47 hours and take 3 planes to go to a bleedin' concert they never wanted to go to in the first place!

Get off your judgy soapbox!

As I said, let's hope the OP's brother has a much better attitude than some posters on here.

Nice gift IMO.

YANBU. Gifts should be "complete". This gift was only half paid for, and only half thought through.

It's equivalent of seeing something nice in a shop and putting a deposit on it as a gift instead of seeing it through & buying it outright & wrapping it & delivering it.

You should drive! I live rurally and although bands do play in my nearest city, I have spent many years driving 3 1/2 hours south to see the bands and will happily continue to do so when they don’t come and play where I live!

Bing bong - was not being judgy at all - nor a martyr. I was illustrating that really an hour from a train is not rural nor is 2 1/2 hrs to get to a concert excessive. It was a nice gift from her brother. How lucky you all are in England to live 20 minutes from your dentists - amazing considering the state of the nations teeth.

Fortunately OP isn#t watching all the further comments, but while for some "nor is 2 1/2 hrs to get to a concert excessive." it clearly is far from convenient for the OP, and as someone else wrote "This gift was only half paid for, and only half thought through."

The other week I'd have loved to have 'taken' a friend to watch the Snooker in Barnsley (if I had had the cash to cover the tickets and fuel), but I didn't have the cash, and more significantly, I don't drive, so it might have been a great day out for me, but he'd have been the one driving both ways.

The other thing is, that although he's 70, he works 4 days a week so going there until 10pm or later would have taken chunks out of two days, very likely...

The OP is coming across as negative and rude because she mischaracterised the issue in her first post, describing herself as pissed off to have been given tickets for something she can’t attend. Of course people have tried to point out that she could attend or offered suggestions as to how to do it.

The fact is, however, that she doesn’t actually want to go, or at least not enough to make an effort. That’s fair enough, just a rather different situation from how she first described it.

OP, own your decision not to go- don’t blame the people who gave you the gift. If you wanted to go, you’d make it happen. Don’t lie to them or pretend you went, or you’ll be lying your whole life. Just say that it was a lovely thought but unfortunately you can’t attend and give the tickets back. They can probably find someone else to take them. I probably wouldn’t expect a second gift in that situation but that’s ok- it’s a gift not an entitlement.

that thing about visiting doctor and dentist to make a day of it - the mind boggles!!

I know 😀 Get your smear done then a clean and polish!

There have been some really nasty responses and personal attacks on this thread. It's almost like people enjoy piling in and being arseholes.

TBH the OP sounds pretty horrible. She has responded in pretty angry fashion to lots of other posters who are only trying to help her. I hope she manages a bit more charm and grace when explaining to her DB why she doesn't want her gift

What crap! The OP has done well not to get more annoyed imo. Honest to god, what is wrong with some people? Try reading the OP before posting, where OP made it quite clear that she doesn't want to go, and yet then gets a shit load of posters telling her how they'd get there. Doh!

And it's a shit present too. How is it thoughtful? It seems to me to be the opposite. DB hasn't thought it through at all if it's going to cost OP £200 to use it. Woohoo! Happy fucking birthday!