To hold a reveal party for....

[Emilybrontescorsett]

My new house?
I'm thinking I could do with some cash as buying a new house is very expensive.
So after the wave of baby shower/gender reveal/henparties/stag parties/weddings etc etc
I've thought of having a kitchen reveal party!!!!!
It would go something along the lines of
Please come to my kitchen reveal party, where I will reveal the worktops/surfaces/units I have chosen, along with flooring choice.
Please bring either a starter, main or pudding plus a bottle of fizz, make sure it is not from Aldi !!!!
Please no cheap crap!
I will enclose a gift list but really really would prefer cash.
If you do happen to bring a gift( and not cash, which is much preferred,) then it must be only from the list and on no account be from any other shop than John Lewis
If you do not live near a John Lewis then please give me cash.

I'll include a tacky poem too.

Anyone who doesn't come will be deleted from my friends list on fb after I have posted a sarcastic meme about only true friends support you in times of need and those who don't can fuck off and die!

What do you think?

@emilybrontescorsett I’ve just read the whole thread and worked out that I am, in fact, your MIL. I don’t appear to have received an invite- I assume it’s lost in the post??

I've just remembered I saw a thread once by someone asking if it would be OK to have a mortgage end party - they'd paid it off early and wanted to invite their friends and family over to watch some papers being ceremonially burned. It was during the property crash I think, and it was pointed out it might be insensitive to struggling friends.

That said, they did raise some money for Shelter, so it did do some good.

Appeased their conscience mostly.

I know we all moan about 'first world' stuff, because that's our lives. But to ask people to donate to homeless charity whilst you spend thousands on a worktop is just crass, and in another league.

I stopped reading when I got to the "Not from Aldi and no cheap crap.'
I can't abide snobs. They grate on my last nerve. Cheap crap is all some people can afford.

If you'd continued to read then you'd have realised it's a satirical thread.

Does that mean that you were otherwise 'on board' with the idea Awwlook?!