I’m interested that it sounds as though (if I’m reading it right) you guys haven’t met any of each other’s family, friends, neighbours, colleagues or what-have-you onscreen?
7 months is a long time for this not to have naturally come up? I’d be walking that iPad with Skype open around my life, if I was this into someone. Or I’d expect that I’d be talking to him when my friend knocked to pick me up and they’d ‘meet’, stuff like that. Mostly I’d imagine this would be spontaneous and accidental, but some part of me would also want a bit of validation that he was what I thought he was, and not emanating any ‘fishy’ vibes to people I trusted.
If all you guys are doing is FaceTiming while lounging on your respective beds, it’s a bit too far from real life to make any predictions for my liking. You get to know a person from observing him in little everyday interactions, not from how tidy his bedside table is.
Even if there’s nothing malicious and manipulating going on, you’re both just putting your best face forward. In essence, it’s like you’re having the same date over and over. If you were face to face, you’d have had 7 months worth of different dates, which would allow you to build a fuller picture.
It’s easy to say ‘but we do argue! We’re experiencing the spectrum!’ But the hardest part of being in the same space is not the argument, but that you have to deal with being out on a country drive afterwards awkwardly together all day, or putting out the rubbish because you said you would even though you want to dump it over their head instead.
Start including other people in your cocoon world, and it will be a bit more real. My advice is that if you arrange to meet it should maybe be at some halfway point, and only for a few brief days with lots of neutral activity options (not tropical honeymoon island). If the chemistry sucks, or big alarm bells ring then it’s not a huge investment. It’s a step at least?