To think my medical notes are confidential

[jessicathecat]

I was recently in hospital and dp picked up my medical notes and started casually leafing through them

He got all huffy when i asked him to stop! Was i being unreasonable?

Is he a new DP?

Medical notes shouldn't be freely available for either patient or relative to look through freely for all sorts of reasons. YANBU

TBH, I'd have a nosey through DH's if they were sat next to me.

Although they are all about his eye condition so written in impenetrable code

Wouldn't bother me if DH read mine - firstly as he knows what's in them, and secondly because I know he doesn't understand medical notes so would know what they were on about anyway.

No, not new.

They're the short ones at the end of your bed though?

If he was just casually rifling through them in front of you then he's unlikely to encounter any deep dark secret

I personally don't share your POV because I am very open with my DH

@BertrandRussell

"I am always puzzled by the "we have no secrets" couples."

Surely that is just a normal healthy relationship? I can't imagine a 'we have lots of secrets' marriage being a great plan.

"I don't want any non HCP reading my medical notes!"

Why?

And only about the actual reason you're in hospital?? I have no idea why you have a problem with this. Don't you like him very much?

I've never known a hospital to leave out full medical records, only the few sheets they leave in the folder at the end of the bed.

I read my Dad's, good job too as they put he refused medication. I was confused, he didn't refuse it at all, they couldn't find a vein to get the needle in so I made sure that was corrected.

My stillborn was "accidentally" recorded in the notes at the end of my bed as an abortion and this was noted by my Sister who was nosing through them. To say I was furious about that was an understatement and they tried the whole I shouldn't have been looking because it's confidential.

I'd say yabu but then I'm not that private around DH nor he around me.

Yes, that's right

Why did he get all huffy?

IIs there a history of not telling each other things?

And how long have you been with him?

Sometimes I don't tell him things because he asks questions and annoys me, tbh.

Has something else been mistakenly noted in them? Or have you fibbed about why you are actually in hospital?

Too long!

Maybe you need to rethink your relationship?

"too long"

Well then that's the issue, I guess

Some people think that privacy is much more important than others. That is their right and I'd expect a partner to be aware of how they might feel about this.
Personally I'd be horrified if anyone other than a HCP read my medical records. That doesn't make me less "open" and I am quite irritated by the condescending, slightly sneering tone of some posters on this thread. I actually don't have any deep, dark secrets, but I would be furious if my husband thought he could just leaf through my records without asking.

I deal with medical notes all day everyday. Some of them are small some of them are volumes and volumes.

Would be very surprised if they were the ones left on the bed

Zippy

Apologies for the deep dark secrets thing

I suppose I just don't understand privacy when it comes to a long 9in my case nearly 30 years) relationship. Unless there are problems in that relationship

I'm private with people I don't trust, and I hate the idea of Facebook, for instance, for that reason

@jessicathecat

YANBU to ask DP not to read your notes if you don't want, but clearly he imagines you have quite an intimate relationship. I don't think you can be too be too pissed off at him for not knowing this particular boundary without being told, but that depends on how long you've been together and what your normal expectations are.

Does it not occur to any of those who are happy for confidential records to be freely available that there are, for example, women in abusive relationships who have very good reasons why their "D"H should not have access to their confidential records?

Seeing

Good point

Your medical notes are utterly confidential and nobody apart from a medical practitioner who's dealing with you has any right to go through them without your permission. End of.

If the poster doesn't disclose that she's in such a relationship then how would anyone know? The OP just asked a question.