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Original poster

Nearly 10yr old DS still believes in Santa

253 replies

Happyhappyveggie · 22/10/2017 17:28

DS is 10 in Jan and still totally believes in Father Christmas. I assume it might be the last one and he's still really sweet & innocent about it all.
But another parent said to me that it was ridiculous that he believes still and that her son had worked it out at age 7.
Aibu to be worried about it or just. E glad that he's still innocent and sweet!

OP posts:
WoooooOfOnesGroan · 22/10/2017 19:48

I believed until about age 10. My mother sat me down and told me that Santa was real, but in a different way -- that he's an expression of all our desire to be kind and good to the people we love most.

I always knew Santa had "helpers" in various places (so that there could be photos of Santa in 2 different places at the same time and they would look a bit different!), but she told me we were ALL really Santa's helpers, all grownups, and that starting that year, I would get to be one of the grownup helpers, choosing gifts for my sister and taking joy in giving as well as receiving.

Maybe you think that's laying it on a bit thick, but it worked wonderfully for me. I felt it to be a rite of passage, part of growing up, and was delighted to be "in" on the secret. I took special delight in buying for my sister and being a "helper."

Parmesanity · 22/10/2017 19:50

I told my 11 year old the summer before he went to high school as he'd never asked but we didn't want him to be teased. He was absolutely still a believer and was absolutely gutted. We've not mentioned it sinceGrin

In fact, some years later, he still 'believes', but he's a dreamer and pleasantly (but not dangerously) naive and I think a part of him always will 'believe'. Some people are just like that and it's absolutely fine.

Whisky2014 · 22/10/2017 19:55

I would be very concerned about his lack of critical thinking skills. haha what a laugh!

If parents go to lengths to make their kid believe (mine put sleigh marks in snow and suity footprints from the fireplace)...there's no way they would think he was fake and the only time the question comes up is when there's been murmurings of older kids at school saying he is not real. No kid would think he wasn't real unless someone else plants the seed.

MakChoon · 22/10/2017 19:55

My two are 9 and 7 and definitely still believe in FC (and the tooth fairy). I assume at least some of their friends do too.

I think it’s likely we’ll need to tell them at some point but it would be nice to have one more Christmas first.

mangomama91 · 22/10/2017 19:58

I think it's so sad that people think 9 is too old to believe!!!
I say let him believe! He's just a child and it's so magical!

pemberleypearl · 22/10/2017 20:00

Just teach him that although Santa isn't real, he kind of is. Santa is the spirit of giving etc. Now that he's older he gets to be in on the secret! :)

LadyGagarden · 22/10/2017 20:01

I can still remember the feeling of absolute excitement and joy that Santa had been. I think I was about 8. I’d never suspected a thing until someone told me at school the following year. I just hadn’t given it a thought really so I’m not surprised that your son still believes. I’m a qualified lawyer so obviously my lack of critical thinking at 8 hasn’t hindered me later in life. My youngest DD will be 7 in November and still believes even though some kids in her class have told her otherwise but she is a lovely, innocent child who believes in magic and fairies and has an amazing imagination. I want her and her older sister who has, Down syndrome, to believe as long as possible and hopefully have the same feeling that I do looking back.

Yogagirl123 · 22/10/2017 20:01

Yes, definitely be glad OP. Kids grow up way too quick.

aliceinwanderland · 22/10/2017 20:02

Dd is 10 and still believes although she has expressed doubts.she disagrees violently with her disbelieving school friends.

Dd2 is 6 and is much more sceptical!

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:06

If parents go to lengths to make their kid believe (mine put sleigh marks in snow and suity footprints from the fireplace)...there's no way they would think he was fake and the only time the question comes up is when there's been murmurings of older kids at school saying he is not real. No kid would think he wasn't real unless someone else plants the seed.

Let's use this and change the example a bit. Let's say that from birth I tell DD that there is a magic fairy that comes and tidied up the house

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:08

Pressed post too soon.

Every night I tidy and clean and do everything I can to convince her that it's true. She's going to believe it, isn't she?

Imagine she gets to 10 or 11 still believing that. People would probably call me all sorts.

How is santa any different?

schoolgaterebel · 22/10/2017 20:08

I think it’s quite sweet he still believes.

But, fgs, don’t send him off to high school still believing in Santa and the tooth fairy, you’ll need to sit him down and tell him before then.

Snailo · 22/10/2017 20:16

@pemberleypearl that's exactly how I see it Smile

5foot5 · 22/10/2017 20:17

Oh let him have at least one more Christmas!
I genuinely believed until just before Secondary School when my mum thought I ought to know.

Of course I had begun to question how it worked but I had two much older sisters who were desperate to keep the baby of the family believing so they came up with ever more fantastic theories as to how it might work.

Towards the end I think I realized there couldn't be just one FC and I knew that the presents were bought by friends and family. I was told that Mum and Dad made an arrangement with a FC and the all my presents were sent to him and he delivered them. I don't think I ever bought in to the flying sleigh idea but other means of transport were discussed.

When other children at school said he wasn't real I was told that he only came to you if your parents could be bothered to make the arrangements Shock

Seriously I was gutted when I found out.

I was disappointed that my DD guessed at six.

HaHaHmm · 22/10/2017 20:19

This is a perennial on these threads and I don’t think has been posted here yet. It’s a lovely way to present the news:

Yes, Virginia, There is a Santa Claus

Whisky2014 · 22/10/2017 20:20

I think We've never done santa and We left the door open for DD to believe if she wanted to, but she never go hand in hand. Of course she doesn't believe because you need gave her anything to believe in.

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:21

Don't worry. Pretty much every to programme, child she's met and adult - even total strangers - have introduced the concept. She knows all about the idea, but has decided not to believe. I'm cool with that.

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:21

*tv programme

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:24

She doesn't believe in the tooth fairy either, but at the moment thinks that other fairies are responsible for seasons changing. (Thanks to Disney.). So it's not that she can't suspend belief, she doesn't want to.

Both DH and I struggled with being lied to about it, and then being forced to perpetuate the lie for younger siblings (DH for a decade after finding out). Wasn't something we were going to copy.

youarenotkiddingme · 22/10/2017 20:24

My ds still believes.

People think he's just humouring me but we've had times in the past where he's got really upset because others have said he doesn't exist.

He has ASD so is developmentally behind socially (functions around 8/9 yrs) - but loads of people say their kids have worked it out by that age!

For the past few years I've not made it a 'thing'. I have guided him to think it there really is a bloke who travels the world on a sleigh drawn by reindeer and with presents for everyone on it!

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:25

*For the past few years I've not made it a 'thing'. I have guided him to think it there really is a bloke who travels the world on a sleigh drawn by reindeer and with presents for everyone on it!i

Isn't that just setting him up for a bigger fall?

Whisky2014 · 22/10/2017 20:27

So titty you agree that someone believes because of life situations which point to that thing being true. The second part is just weird because the expectation is not for someone to always believe throughout their whole life that santa exists..it's only whilst they are young. If they always believed there was a cleaning fairy then they'd be living in a shit tip which would affect their health. It's not comparable at all. Were you the poster on another santa thread poo pooing it?
What about God. Why is that acceptable to believe until the person dies? Should we all think they are fucking stupid and not capable of critical thinking? Religion is one of the biggest causes of war. Millions have died and yet religion prevails. Santa is harmless fun ffs

Whisky2014 · 22/10/2017 20:28

But if it's never happened directly to her of course she wouldn't believe. Tv programmes and people she speak to are irrelevant. It has to actually happen to her otherwise of course it's just a story!

TittyGolightly · 22/10/2017 20:28

I do think religion is a crock of shit, yes. But again, DD is free to find her own way with that.

Santa and religion are the same thing to me. If anything santa is worse - everyone knows full well that that is made up.

youarenotkiddingme · 22/10/2017 20:30

My ds is 13 btw!

Funniest thing is when he was about 8 I did the talc footprints from front door to his room. Took me ages and looked really realistic.
Ds got up and when he got to my room asked me "why are there talcum powder footprints in the hallway" Grin

5 years on and he still believes in santa. He just takes things so literally- so santa leaves a stocking so he must exist!

He totally doesn't believe in God though and thinks anyone religious is odd Confused

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