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Original poster

To think that it's not transphobic

122 replies

TannedHand · 13/10/2017 12:56

...to suggest that a man wearing a tiny miniskirt - which rides up over his hips with every step he takes - with no underwear on a busy high street is behaving inappropriately? And that as he was making no attempt to adjust his skirt, it was evident he was unbothered by the effect he might be having on everyone who passed him (mainly women and children at that time of day, dropping off at the local primary school)?

Apparently I'm transphobic and not respecting his right to wear what he wants. Apparently I should show understanding that he hasn't quite got his feminine look down pat. Apparently I'm misgendering him.

All accusations laid at my door elsewhere on the internet when I mentioned this (witnessed by me and hundreds of others on a local busy street yesterday morning, btw).

His right to wander around with his cock and balls hanging out trumps that of others to not see it. Women who have suffered assault, who might be especially upset. Children. Or, let's face it, anyone who doesn't want to see a stranger's twig and berries first thing on a Thursday morning.

At the risk of starting another Trans-themed bunfight, wtf is wrong with people?!

OP posts:
pisacake · 13/10/2017 14:41

"If the person in question is trans then you are misgendering them by referring to them with the incorrect pronoun. "

Sorry are you taking the piss?

The MAN is showing off his PENIS.

Therefore the correct pronoun is HE.

There really is no confusion about this, surely?

Or are you saying because the penis is (not really) covered in a skirt, it's a female penis?

Is a Scotsman in a kilt a 'she'?

Seniorcitizen1 · 13/10/2017 14:41

He's a flasher and should be arrested. I would have called the police

Terrylene · 13/10/2017 14:43

If the person in question is trans then you are misgendering them by referring to them with the incorrect pronoun You have to ask first - you can't assume that if the person is wearing a skirt (however precariously) that the person is a 'she'.

Terrylene · 13/10/2017 14:44

Or if they are wearing a beard that they are 'he'

drawn on moustache is definitely he though

Original poster
TannedHand · 13/10/2017 14:48

The person was dressed in the feminine so it would be assumed they are she not he

Oh of course, silly me, that was his ladypenis I saw.

How very transphobic of me.

OP posts:
Original poster
TannedHand · 13/10/2017 14:50

@Singlelady I'm wearing trousers and no makeup today. Is it to be assumed I'm a he?

Take your ridiculous gender stereotypes elsewhere.

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 13/10/2017 14:53

I think it is only sexist if you'd be happy with a woman to dress this way. Personally I don't want to see any teenage/adult crotches/underwear on the street.

differenteverytime · 13/10/2017 14:54

That is, in fact, an interesting point. What actually constitutes 'misgendering'? Is there an agreed definition?

I have a female-bodied friend who prefers male pronouns. So I call him 'he'. But I do that out of courtesy, not because I believe that he actually is male. If I called him 'she' instead, would that be misgendering?

If another person wants to be called 'they' and instead I call them 'he' or 'she', is that misgendering?

What if a person wants to use pronouns like 'ke' or 'le' that weren't previously in the language, because that is what best reflects their gender identity. If I refuse to use those pronouns, would that be misgendering?

So now everybody in my workplace chose ze/xe pronouns as well, or began regularly changing pronouns. If I said that this was impractical because nobody could keep track, would that be misgendering?

Because if the first two is misgendering, then presumably so are the second two? I wonder whether the concept of 'misgendering' is an ill-advised attempt to police what should in fact be a matter of courtesy.

Unless, of course, the real offence is not what I say, but what I think. If I don't believe that my friend is in fact a man, is that misgendering?

BarbarianMum · 13/10/2017 14:55

Sorry singlelady but I'm not playing that game any more. It's gone too far and there is too much at stake.

Original poster
TannedHand · 13/10/2017 15:01

Sorry singlelady but I'm not playing that game any more. It's gone too far and there is too much at stake

I'm with you, Barbarian.

I think it's interesting how so many younger women cling onto these ideas and are avowed TAs. How many of them call women like us TERFs and fake feminists. I wonder if they'll still feel the same in ten, twenty years time, when their rights have gradually been eroded, and they've lived enough to understand that things like refuges, changing rooms, prisons etc are all-female for a reason. I'm not being condescending - I just think that the idealism of youth may one day fall away and they'll be horrified at what they've allowed to happen. By which time it may well be too late.

OP posts:
terryleather · 13/10/2017 15:03

I'll bet my last hrt tablet that "Pips" is a middle aged AGP crossdresser taking the piss.

The narcissistic male privilege & entitlement that it takes to behave like this while setting yourself up as some kind of spokesperson for female equality in business and being lauded by institutions like the FT for it blows my mind.

The powerlessness I feel in the face of the "reality optional culture" makes me want to weep.

intimeandspace · 13/10/2017 15:09

"Twig and berries" Grin

YoureAnArseholeDenise · 13/10/2017 15:12

Singlelady oh. Do. Fuck. OFF 😁😁

busyboysmum · 13/10/2017 15:21

In California you can now get a year in prison for misgendering whereas the penalty for deliberately infecting someone with HIV has just been reduced to 6 months.

KitKat1985 · 13/10/2017 15:24

In California you can now get a year in prison for misgendering whereas the penalty for deliberately infecting someone with HIV has just been reduced to 6 months.

Bloody hell, that's insane.

Dustbunny1900 · 13/10/2017 15:27

busyboys WHAT?? I heard about the hiv thing (downgraded to misdemeanor. Nice huh?)

California is a different world of some top notch backward insanity

kaytee87 · 13/10/2017 15:31

God my husband put my bra on once for a laugh, I even got a picture. Does that make him a trans women? No, it means he's a man who wore a piece of woman's clothing.

This man is a pervert and needs locked up. I'd be furious if my child was subjected to seeing that.

Thistledew · 13/10/2017 15:47

It's irrelevant really whether that person identifies as female or not as there is no objective standard by which it is possible to identify someone as transgender.

If you were to encounter someone who has all the appearance of being male in a female designated space such as a public toilet or changing room (and they weren't to immediately rush out in mortification) then they are likely to be either a) transgender or b) a man who gets his kicks from making women feel uncomfortable. As the people in category a) have every right to be in that space and their right not to be challenged is enshrined in law, then there is no basis on which you can challenge someone you believe comes into category b). There is no point reporting him and asking for him to be removed as he can just claim protections afforded to category a).

MissionItsPossible · 13/10/2017 15:47

busyboysmum

I read someone who got thirty years for unknowingly infecting someone with HIV (He took a plea and it got reduced to...ten). Of course, this was a gay black man in front of an all white all straight jury in a southern state so I expect it's not uncommon in a place where you could murder someone and get less time. California is crazy. There's an ongoing case in Scotland of a man deliberately infecting lovers wth HIV and then contacting them and taunting them afterwards so it'll be interesting to see what he gets.

maxthemartian · 13/10/2017 16:13

Interesting wrenika that you're so quick to get on the defensive about transwomen yet are happy to victim blame a teenage girl subjected to multiple sexual assaults.

dontquotem3 · 13/10/2017 16:21

Jessie? I always thought his/her name was Vivian.

HouseholdWords · 13/10/2017 16:45

As the people in category a) have every right to be in that space and their right not to be challenged is enshrined in law, then there is no basis on which you can challenge someone you believe comes into category b). There is no point reporting him and asking for him to be removed as he can just claim protections afforded to category a).

And that's the kicker.

Given the very low rate of prosecution for rape, sexual harassment, and sexual assault against women; given the kinds of things we hear about Trump and now Weinstein; given the privileges over women's bodies men feel entitled to -

But WOMEN are the ones who are supposed to be able to keep ourselves safe, speak out against sexual harassment,* and tell the malicious/criminal man from the genuine transwoman????????

That's what is so shite about the current situation.

*Notice how it didn't take long re Weinstein for people to start to say of all the women "Why didn't she say something?"

Bicyclethief · 13/10/2017 16:51

What is amazing is that people actually think there is two sides to this argument. Just keep your genitals covered regardless of sex/gender. I don't want to see it and more importantly, I don't want my young DS or any other child to see it.

Trueheart1 · 13/10/2017 18:34

How have the police got tougher on "Jessie". My friend was with her son in Clapham and asked what was hanging below the mans skirt. My friend just bustled her son away. I do not understand why the police allow him to expose himself in public.
Feel free to look at the outfits he wears in public. www.claphamtranny.com

YoureAnArseholeDenise · 13/10/2017 19:10

What the fuck is that and what does it think it looks like 🙄