Talk

Flip

1 2 3 4

AIBU?

Who's in the wrong?

88 replies

NicoleB67 · 06/10/2017 23:14

OH and I have been playing around with each other all night and messing about acting like 13 year olds (FYI, we are in our mid 30's LOL). I was standing next to the TV and had a hair grip in my hand that I threw at him jokingly and it hit him just below the eye which he got into a right fit about and got pissed off with me. He then proceeded to pick up the big sky remote and throw it pretty hard at my thigh in retaliation (also anger which I could see etched on his face). He is a 6 foot tall sportsman with a strong arm and it really f**king hurt and is still stinging now half an hour later and left a mark. I'm really upset with him but he seems to think I'm in the wrong for starting it by the grip thing. Who's in the wrong here? (Sorry for the school type post, I do get it comes across v immature and am prepared to be flamed )

OP posts:

Report

RhiWrites · 07/10/2017 13:05

This has to be the end of messing about and horseplay for the two of you. What happens if you swat at him in play and it hurts him? Will he punch you in the face?

Set a boundary here and watch out for anything else that looks like retaliating or sudden responses in anger. It's unwise to throw things at people except for sports, but it's a red flag to throw deliberately intending to hurt.

Report

Motoko · 07/10/2017 13:28

But had the OP had a book, remote control, mug etc in her hand that most likely would have been lobbed his way

That's unlikely. A hair grip is so light, she probably didn't think it would even hit him.

He took revenge, as a PP said, he should have just said "Ow, that hurt" and she would've said sorry. Instead he lobbed a heavy, hard object, with force at her. He is in the wrong, not OP.

Report

PandorasXbox · 07/10/2017 14:04

I disagree, depending on what type of hair grip it could have caused some damage had it hit him in the eye.

Report

MummyMuppet2x2 · 07/10/2017 14:09

This A hair grip is so light, she probably didn't think it would even hit him.

He took revenge, as a PP said, he should have just said "Ow, that hurt" and she would've said sorry. Instead he lobbed a heavy, hard object, with force at her. He is in the wrong, not OP.

It seems so obvious who is in the wrong here.

Report

kali110 · 07/10/2017 14:35

Him.
Me and dp play around all the time.
Ive accidently hurt him, ( and felt awful) he would never what your dp did.
My dp could easily hurt me as he's huge, but would never.
You hurt him by accident, your dp hurt you in anger.

Report

Motoko · 07/10/2017 17:37

I disagree, depending on what type of hair grip it could have caused some damage had it hit him in the eye

That still doesn't excuse him from throwing a remote control, even if it did hit him in the eye (which it didn't, so your point is moot).

Report

BewareOfDragons · 07/10/2017 17:49

He was in the wrong. You were both messing around, you tossed something at him, he completely overreacted and set out to hurt you. And he's considerably bigger and stronger than you, too, and he used that.

What if you two had a DC who threw something, as children do, and hurt him, or spilled something on him ... is he going to go mental in a moment of rage on him? Because that's what he's just shown you ... and no apparent remorse for actually hurting you.

Report

Papafran · 07/10/2017 17:56

Hmm. It's idiotic of you to 'play-fight' in the sense of throwing stuff at each other. However, it is worrying for him to react the way he did. You would need to think about whether there have been any other incidents where his behaviour has concerned you. If not, I suggest not throwing things at other adults. Why do you have to playfight?