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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what's the worst thing you've overheard?

194 replies

caringdenise009 · 28/09/2017 19:47

Mine has to be the long loud argument between my neighbours about anal sex. It went on for 15 hours. Such gems as her screaming at him " anyone who wants to fuck a woman up the arse must be a fucking poof anyway". She had her period and wasn't in the mood. All at the top of their voices. For 15 hours. Charming.

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 01/10/2017 09:21

My DM telling a relative my 18 month old DNiece would soon catch up with my 2.5 yo DD...because my DB and his DW are far more academic and sporty than me & DH.

10 years later DH and I sometimes laugh about it and say we're still waiting for DN to catch up with DD (DNeice turned out not to be super academic or at all sporty!) but it still hurts.

SIL has said to my face we had the wrong children Hmm. No we fecking didn't.

WaitroseCarpark · 01/10/2017 13:13

I was on a stag do and the stag, who already had a baby with partner, suddenly broke down at 3am and said, nearly in tears 'I don't know why I'm not happy, I should be the happiest I've been in my life but I hate it'.

He's now had another kid with aforesaid wife and lives a life of absolute misery. It will all end in tears. We (his male friends) all tried to get him to pack it in before it got serious (before first child came along, his partner is a proper handful, and we are all reasonable and nearly in our 40s) but the poor guy was such a walkover he just went with it. He's completely crushed, it's so sad.

Schmoopy · 01/10/2017 13:22

I've know a couple of people in similar positions, Waitrose.

But I'm afraid that I have very little sympathy for people who forge ahead regardless and then spend their lives crying about it.

Schmoopy · 01/10/2017 13:23

Sorry, should have added - and also bring multiple children into the mix.

uhhuhh · 01/10/2017 13:24

Neighbour standing outside my window saying about me "I mean if she's so fucking great then she shouldn't have got knocked up at such a young age, stupid bitch". Knocked on the door & told her I could hear every word & didn't appreciate it. She apologised & has been extremely quiet ever since Grin

londonista · 01/10/2017 14:22

My husband and his brother are 3 of the most dutiful, modest, selfless people you could ever met. We were having a family dinner and we were congratulating my brother in law about something he’d accomplished and his mum (my mum in law) just looked over at him and said “oh look at him so self important, but it’s okay I always know how to cut him down to size”.

It was very quiet rest of the meal. As we pondered what must have happened to you in your life to make you want to cut your own kids down to size.

londonista · 01/10/2017 14:22

2 not 3. Fat fingers.

Curious2468 · 01/10/2017 15:36

I once overheard a mum telling a young child who was playing up a bit 'this is why your daddy doesn't love you'. I was gobsmacked but unable to say anything. I often think about it though.

Not overheard but actually said to our face by sil 'mil and I have been talking and we recon we will have to take the baby out lots as, well, you are both a bit boring really'. The funniest part is they never do anything with my kids and mil default is to stick them in front of a screen. It still make me sad though. Must point out though that we do all sorts with the kids whilst sil barely does anything with her daughter.

KurriKurri · 01/10/2017 16:30

When I'd just come home from hospital after a MMC, overheard my (now x) H telling his friend over the phone that I'd just had an abortion.

Tatiana1986 · 01/10/2017 16:54

A very lively little girl, about 4 or 5, with her exasperated and shouty mum at McDonald's. The mum kept snapping at the little girls for no apparent reason whatsoever and in the end yelled with absolute look of disgust and hatred on her face 'You are just like your dad!'

Felt sorry for the little thing. She didn't ask to be born Sad

Idontevencareanymore · 01/10/2017 17:12

For context I work on a checkout and overheard this little gem.

Customer- hi blah, how you doing today?
Blah- hello, how do you know my name?
Customer- it's on your name badge right there.

I was sat behind in creases.

Username324 · 01/10/2017 17:14

I was waiting for the hospital consultants ward round, my bed was nearest the door to the corridor and it was very quiet.

I could hear one of the consultants minions trying and failing to get a drink from the vending machine just a few yards away in the corridor.

There was much muttering and shaking of the vending machine when the posh consultant announced, ‘head butt the fucking thing!’ Grin

OstentatiousWanking · 01/10/2017 17:57

Over heard in my local shop. A 14ish girl in school uniform talking to two lads. Slightly older but also in uniform. The girl said to them in a really spiteful voice. "When she told me she was raped in the park I laughed in her face."
She saw the look of disgust I shot her and at least had the grace to look away.
As I walked out I leaned towards her and told her she was a disgrace.

amusedbush · 01/10/2017 18:10

Not quite the same but when I was about 19 a colleague with whom I was friendly (she sat at the next desk over and we ate lunch together almost every day) forwarded me a joke in an email. However, something made me scroll down and I found a full email trail between her and the guy she fancied on our floor slagging me off, saying how fat and boring I was. I had just lost 3 stone on Weight Watchers and she suggested that I only pretended to diet at work and I probably went home to eat a whole cake. On and on it went Sad

I confronted her right there and then at our desks and although her face was red, all she could say was, 'well, you do go on a bit...'

I forwarded to our manager and let HR deal with the pair of them.

StrangeLookingParasite · 01/10/2017 21:40

It was very quiet rest of the meal. As we pondered what must have happened to you in your life to make you want to cut your own kids down to size.

I imagine she was from a similar culture and génération as my mother. Having a big head (elsewhere known as self-esteem) was the worst sin possible.

ceeveebee · 01/10/2017 21:44

A male couple at the next table when we were on a ski trip. One of them was married (to a woman) and had snuck away for a clandestine weekend, and spent the evening flirting and kissing but also talking anout whether his wife suspected anything...

EccentricNamechanger · 02/10/2017 08:17

My Stepmum telling 'D'Dad that I'm not allowed to come round to their house anymore because I 'killed her baby'. For the record, she had a late miscarriage after the bonfire/fireworks display I'd wanted DDad to take me to, and she said if the fireworks hadn't made her jump, then she wouldn't have lost the baby. So it was my fault her baby died. Also, because I'm a reminder that my DM has a baby with him and she doesn't, so she doesn't want me there.
I was 7 and he didn't bother with me again, his loss.
But at the time I genuinely thought loud noises must cause miscarriage, so thought it was my fault. Cunt.

SandmanSlim · 02/10/2017 10:33

Eccentric that's horrible Flowers

My one was at a Christmas market. Waiting for DH to come of the loos ended up standing next to a man on the phone to his sons mum (I hope they weren't still together) shouting and ranting that she'd have to cope with his son as he needed a break and he didn't care if his son was ill, she had to cope. I'd had a few gluhweins so I had to run away before I said something. I didnt manage not to glare. I just hope she has LTB he was so horrible. Imagine being proper sweary ranty cross because your baby was ill but you wanted to drink beer.

SandmanSlim · 02/10/2017 10:34

Oh and I had my DS in a sling and he was very very aggressive hence not wanting to tell him off - even though he needed it. I just glared and ran.

Lumidee · 02/10/2017 10:42

In pub toilets I overheard a woman describing her encounter with a circumcised willy after a date night.
Apparently she was only planning to suck him off because she "isn't some kind of slag" but confront with what she called a "snail without a shell" so a slug then?! she felt she had to have PIV sex with him because she "couldn't have that thing anywhere near [her] face" Hmm

At a family party I overheard SIL telling a relative that me and DH are "absolutely loaded", we'll leave millions when we die and she hopes it all goes to her DD's descendants. We're only in our early 30s and we're really really not loaded Hmm

Lumidee · 02/10/2017 10:46

Mine aren't bad, sorry! Just lighthearted.

user1492507733 · 02/10/2017 16:34

My BiL telling my DH yesterday that I was too old for an Audi TT. I am only 51!

Witchend · 02/10/2017 16:49

A funny one not worst:

I work at a place which hires rooms out for conferences and there was a NHS nurses meet in one room. As I went past I heard one of them say:
"I dreamt about Jeremy Corbyn last night"
Quick as a flash the response came.
"I diagnose cheese. Gives me nightmares too."
Grin

grasspigeons · 02/10/2017 16:51

When I was miscarrying I heard the nurses teasing the youngish good looking male doctor who went to get a speculum. There were lots of what size - virgin, slapper or post baby type comments and then some giggling about whether it was a good looking patient. He didn't join in the banter but he didn't stop it. When he returned I said the curtains weren't that sound proof. He looked embarrassed and said I'll get another doctor to do this.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 02/10/2017 17:00

I don'tShock easily, Grass, but. That's awful.