to consider reporting this family for having lied to the school?

[mnbvcx445566]

Two parents and one child. They live nowhere near the primary state school they applied for and got into. I think - am pretty sure - they used a different address to the one they live at.
School very sought after. Shall I report them?

I've looked carefully into myself and this is what I think:

1- I am not jealous. If I had the chance to do the same I would not. I would like my child to go to a great state school so they are lucky for that but I would not play the way they did.

2- If I report them the child will have problems at school (? don't quite know what happens in those cases). The parents might have a breakdown or something having to face the backlash. Obviously they have brains and made their choice and would only pay the consequences of their actions but - I - would have precipitated the situation by reporting them. Maybe the system is so fucked anyway that what they did is not that big of a deal. Surely the school should have done 1000 checks before awarding places so there might be something I do not know. What I do know is that they live miles from that school, which has a very very small catchment area.

3- I should report them because if my child did not get into that school 'legally' I would despise people who took advantage of a loophole and took 'my child's place'.

WWYD?

I am a long-time poster/user but I have opened a different account as I do not want to be recognised. (If I do not want to face them and tell them that they are committing an illegal/immoral action does it mean that I am in the wrong thinking of calling the school anonymously?)

Why would I come on here and ask for opinions/information on the process if I was a mean spirited ugly person who did it out of spite? I would just do it and no one would need to know the reasons why I did it. If I live with myself being a mean spirited person every day why can't I live with having done something ugly? Why do I need to find support here?
I just do not get this reasoning.

The child could have a statement or be in the care system. Just leave things alone and just be happy your child has got into this sort after school.

Validation, approval, being told it's the absolutely right thing to do?

Maybe you didn't bargain on so many posters telling you to keep your nose out?

independently of my reasons....

What are your reasons grudges with this family OP because it is glaringly obvious you are being mean spirited and attempting to justify yourself by spouting on about the interests of fairness.

OP would've fitted right in had she grown up in communist east Germany. The Stasi loved to hire nosy malignant curtain-twitchers like her to report on their neighbours' lives. Saved a fortune on keeping an army of actual secret policemen, I imagine.

I think you should keep your nose out, surely you have better things to worry about? There's many reasons why a child maybe at a school outside their catchement. Both of my children go to schools out of catchement, one has a sn statement and goes to a school in a different county, the other I applied for a school out of catchement and was given a place (no lying involved), I have also known children in Forster care get places out of catchement.

Tiggy The OP has an axe to grind with this family. If she was truthful in her original post, she would have written her OP as 'It is totally unfair that my inlaws/neighbours got a place at a school they weren't entitled to get and it is especially unfair as I didn't do whatever they did to secure a place for my own child and I'm going to make sure they don't get away with it''.

The whole school admissions crap is a horrible experience made worse by people who lie and cheat

^This.
One of my children is considerably younger than my others and the difference in our experience of applications and access to schools between then and now is like a gulf. I know there's a greater population issue now but the stress caused to us this year was unreal. The school I wanted wasn't even particularly good or sought after I just wanted it because it had served us well in the past and my son knew it. If someone else got a place there based on a lie it would really rub salt in the wounds and I'm the last person you could call a school place snob

At the time I thought that no one would have the gall to lie twice, but now I'm not so sure.

It's amazing what lengths some people will go to but sadly not beyond belief. I've never reported anyone about anything and don't go looking for reasons to but the I'm alright jack and entitled attitudes are disturbing

Let's make another example.

A person I know has cheated on her CV and got a job. I did not get that job and I know of the cheating. Am I entitled to report it or am I been mean spirited? Or even if I did not want that job. Am I mean spirited if I report this because I think it's not fair?

Or I applied for that school and my child did not get in. I know someone might have fiddled the paperwork and I report it. Would this not be mean spirited because it's my child we are talking about and not a complete stranger who doesn't know the place should be theirs?

Tiggytape I had not thought about it that way but I agree with you. Even if I was the ugliest person in the village, would that make it right for someone to do that and I did not have the high moral ground to say so?

I don’t know how it work where you live, but where I live, people paid high property taxes (even in rent) to go to the school district they want to go. Those taxes go to the school in that district. I personally think every school should be the best quality but the system prevents this :(

I know 3 separate families who have used grandparents address to get into a good, oversubscribed primary school. Two at DS's old school, and one at the school in the area we moved to a few years ago.

I think this may have been before such stringent checks were in place, or they fixed it so it really did look like they lived at that address. I know for a fact that one of the mothers was on the electoral roll at the grandparent's address, (it was her childhood home) although she no longer lived there.

Must admit, it never occurred to me to report it. It would have felt like a really shitty thing to do.

If you feel the child's parents fraudeuntly gained a place in a sought after school report it.

This happened in our area recently - suddenly our local school became very popular. Children appeared within the school that nobody knew - we are a very small tight knit village.

Some new starters, from the village, who had siblings already attending the village school, did not gain a place at the school and had to be transported miles away to a school with spaces. Not all children from the village were able to attend the same school. My neighbours child was given a place 15 miles away. He was put in a position of having no school friends to play out with through no choice of his own of his parents.

It turned out that all the parents of children from outside the catchment area lied about their address, using addresses of friends etc

Why should local children have to attend a school away from their siblings and peer group to accommodate those who lie their way through life to suit their own needs? I'm alright Jack....

BUT YOU DON'T KNOW FOR SURE THEY HAVE COMMITTED FRAUD.

You're just doing a bit of crappy detective work. You're not even friends with them.

'My neighbours child was given a place 15 miles away. He was put in a position of having no school friends to play out with through no choice of his own of his parents.It turned out that all the parents of children from outside the catchment area lied about their address'

15 miles away. Right. All the parents lied? It's like a story from the dm

@JonSnowsWife

The OP has already said they don't know all the facts yet somehow knows the child doesn't have sens/isn't adopted but does know that the person committed fraud even though they don't even talk to the mum well enough to know any of this.

Even if the OP doesn't know if the child has sens etc, she is still within her rights to report this family. As has been said (many times on this thread,) if that's the case, then all will be fine, will it not? Or would you rather children who live 2 minutes walk from the school should have to travel 5-10 miles to school, because someone is a massive liar.

@CoffeeBreakIn5

The whole school admissions crap is a horrible experience made worse by people who lie and cheat. If a parent decides to lie and cheat then they are the ones who are putting the child's school place at risk once they have started, not the people who end up reporting.

Exactly! It's like if someone is cheating benefits, or stealing from their employer etc, and someone reports them, and the person committing the crime gets fired or taken to court etc, it's not the fault of the person reporting it; it's the fault of the numpty who committed the 'wrongful' act in the first place!!!

Reminds me of a time when a friend of mine told her friend that her husband was seeing another woman. She spied on him and caught him out, and she left him, took the kids, and started divorce proceedings. He lost everything. Even his own 2 kids (10 and 13 then,) wouldn't talk to him. Still won't, 3 years later.

Guess who said husband blamed? You guessed it; the friend - for telling his wife about his affair. None of his downfall was his fault, or the other woman's. It was ALL the fault of the friend!

This is a similar case. Some people on here are aiming bile at the OP for wanting to cause trouble, and ruin this child's education etc, but if the child's life IS upheaved, the only ones to blame will be the parents for lying, and cheating the system.

Upshot is OP, DO report this. If the family are doing no wrong, then nothing will happen, will it?

And ignore the people saying 'mind your own business;' it IS your business AND everyone else's! And the 'you have too much time on your hands' chestnut is getting boring now; it's like there's a fucking echo in here!

My neighbours child was given a place 15 miles away.

That's ridiculous. A friend of mine won her appeal when her children were placed in schools three miles apart. She was a single parent and couldn't be in two places at once.

I know someone who is claiming to live with her mother to get her children into a school in an excellent area.

She actually lives 20 miles away.

I have not reported her. It's none of my business.

OP, I think I would have the same concerns as you. I think I would report it, not in a 'the parents have done something illegal and the child absolutely needs to go', but 'I am concerned that a place may, maybe, perhaps been taken fraudulently.' It's not really your job to find out if they have taken a place fraudulently, it is the authority's job to enquire and find out but you can report. And I believe you should.

So in your shoes, I would probably report my concerns, but I would keep quiet about it to other families. I wouldn't gossip about it or enquire any further.

And now, looking at @MyrtleMaracas post, people are starting to mock and disbelieve people, and accuse them of making stuff up, and are putting silly grinning smileys. A sure sign of someone losing the argument.

@fannydaggerz

I haven't reported her it's none of my business

Bully for you.

it's not the fault of the person reporting it; it's the fault of the numpty who committed the 'wrongful' act in the first place!!!

Re benefits. It is if the report was malicious. Like the idiot neighbour who's reported someone I know for lying about her son being in a wheelchair. (she'd seen him in the garden having physiotherapy - put two and two together and made 15). Everything was stopped whilst they investigated the accusation.

I'd report then keep under the radar.

I do feel for the child but if a genuine child has lost out and their family life has now been made more difficult, that's really not fair.