To ditch NCT?

[Hollyhop17]

I had my pfb 11 weeks ago. We are pretty isolated where we live, no family close by, so I did NCT to get some mum friends close by.

There are 8 of us and I am the only one who had a section and the only one who isn't bfing anymore. In general they are quite rude/insensitive as all they talk about is either bfings or their labour stories which obviously I can't join in.

My section was due to a breech and I tried really hard for 3 weeks to bf but I couldnt. After hyperemesis I just didn't have the mental capacity to carry on.

The final straw has come today. Ive got a bad cold and asked if anyone else had been ill since giving birth and if they had any tips for avoiding passing it on. The immediate, smug, response I got was 'breastfes babies dont get ill'. Making me feel guilty all over again.

I am deaperate for local friends so dont want to cut my nose off to spite my face but this group just generally make me feel bad about myself.

AIBU to take a step back from the group?

Ditch ditch ditch ditch ditch x 300 million!

I found some amazing friends via Nethuns. Hated the judgy NCT bitches. Awful people - nearly made me ill.

Hang around in the booze aisle of your local supermarket. I once made a mum friend there. I was buying bourbon with ds in a pushchair and she was eyeing up the sauvignon blanc with a-2-seconds-from-tantrum toddler hanging off her.

Eh, breastfed babies can get pretty ill.
You are better off ditching the bitch club and moving on.

The babies/pregnancy is what brought you into contact... but I wonder if you are just starting to realise that these really aren't people that you can form lasting and significant friendships with.... whatever your differing experiences the whole point of these groups are mutual support, if you've shown that you can listen and reassure them with their experiences and stories but feel like you get no support or only judgement/criticism in return... then what's the point?

I did none of this stuff to start with. Initially it was enough to walk the dogs, meet up with sister in law/cousin who had baby a year older and were a mine of support, then later met lovely "normal" baby friends through church group and library singing group. There was an ott cliquey nct core even in that group but we did our own thing.. it will get easier

They sound really boring! I'm breastfeeding at the minute and I'm not sure how you would sustain one conversation about it, let alone multiple conversations. What is there to say?

Sashkin, they can go for ages. Which app is better to track it, what is best to wear, bfing at events, switching boob to feed vs feeding on one and expressing on the other...

Bloody hell thats boring if anything! I made great NCT pals and there was a wide mix of Csec/bottles/breast/vag/IVF etc

Have you got the HOOP app? Lots of baby groups on there depending on where u are

They sound tedious! I had CS and FF because BF didn't work, and no one in my group ever judged me one bit. We did talk about our births a lot in the early days because we all had tough births for various reasons, and I do remember a lot of BF conversations because people found it tough in the early stages. No excuse for that smug (and inaccurate!) comment though. Definitely ditch them if they're being like that! I met some nice people at baby groups, I liked Baby Sensory and a little baby playgroup I found!