To think this is cheeky

[Ttbb]

Also a WWYD

So we have our son down for three (the only three) prep schools in our area. One of the (A) is very good sendingchildren to Eton and Stowe and what not. This our first choice. The second one (B) belongs to an averagely good public school. It seems fine, I would be happy for my sons to go there but our hopes lie further afield for senior school. Third school (C) belongs to as less good private school. We do not want our children to go there long term but the junior school seems fine. Son is on the nursery department there and we are quite happy with it. He is garunteed a place in the junior school as a result.

School B has just sent us a letter offering DS a place for next year requiring a response and a non-refundable deposit by 28th of September. September! School A doesn't even offer places until January. We have every reason to be hopeful about obtaining a place at school A but the school is selective so we are worried that we may fall short as far as nursery reccomendations etc go.

The deposit the school B is asking for is £500. It's not a huge sum of money but we have had a lot of financial difficulties and burdens recently so it's not a small sum for us at present. WWYD pay the deposit at risk of loosing it or defer accepting to offer at risk of not obtaining a place at schools A or B being left with C?

Only an ignorant person would not realise the danger in a monopolised education system. What happens when a far right or for left government cones into power and starts brainwashing children into believing is racial supremacy or communism? While Britain has been moderately successful in creating a division of powers the overlap between the executive and parliamentary branches of government here a deeply concerning. Just imagine a UKIP type government in charge of setting curriculum in every single school across Britain with nowhere, that is no private sector, to flee to. Do you really think that they would care of 'engaged' parents started complaining or pulled their children out of school? Of course not. They would just criminalise doing so. 9/10 it would be just fine, British politicians seem to observe an unspoken convention to be as middle grounds as possible but the risk is far too great. How you cannot see that is beyond me, either you have very little imagination or you have not learned e Pugh about human history to know that when power is conferred it will eventually be abused.

@ the idea of people fleeing to the private sector to escape a UKIP inspired national curriculum........

Well, OP, presumably if we got the sort of government you describe it would abolish private schools in any case, so I'm not quite sure what your point is.

Imagine if a government used the state education to create some kind of under class by underfunding it, insisting on curricula full of boring useless shite, and grinding its teachers into the ground through overwork and lack of pay, ensuring those kids could not think for themselves. All the while they'd be educating their own children in far broader and creative ways in institutions that'd ensured the over-privileged had stayed that way for centuries.

That'd be bad.

'plantsitter*

If your household earnings are as unpredictable as you say to the extent you don't even have £500 in savings then I'd have a look around that good state school if I was you.
I knew a girl whose parents poured all their money into their child's private education when I was younger. The parents had good jobs but the dads career meant earning lots then periods of earning nothing. They sacrificed a lot for their dds private education. And she still wasn't very bright.

Thanks for the wackiest argument for private schools I've ever read though.

Ttbb I am rather enjoying your defence of prep schools as the ultimate defenders of intellectual liberty against the otherwise inevitable rise of Cultural Marxism / Dark Enlightenment movements.

My parents and siblings went to local comps and we all did pretty well, but it looks like I should be sending my own kids to preps if I want them to be a bulwark against the UK going totalitarian?

Please advise further if you can spare the time.

the idea of people fleeing to the private sector to escape a UKIP inspired national curriculum

Out of the frying pan into the, er, more expensive frying pan?

Thanks for the wackiest argument for private schools I've ever read though.

And the wackiest avoidance of simply saying 'I've got money, I'm going to buy privilege with it".

I'm slightly confused though that someone can be not local enough to understand the system at the beginning of the thread, but have been to school here by the end of it.

I've definitely read this wrong I'm sure.. excuse me if I have but I'm shattered

husband is earning an £50,000 more each year these last three years with no sign of slowing down

So your husband is earning 50k more per year? I'm sure I've read that wrong or in the wrong context but if so what the hell does he do??

Excellent post *cinnamontoast.

If I could afford Eton I don't think I'd worry too much about the £500 if I liked the school. If A and B are the only option you really want then you'll have to pay the £500 deposit for B and lose it if he gets into your first choice school. Which will be a bonus anyway if you think it's a better school.

I just don't believe this thread is genuine. Fees for Eton are about £30K pa. If you can't afford £500 then you're punching way above your weight. And you can't rely on a bursary being offered - they're offered at the school's discretion, not just because you want one.

So op- I have an extremely bright dd who is 6. I am poor and live in a NW city with quite poor schools locally.

So my dd is being failed. I have NO choice.
I do not have a husband, not even a poor one. I do everything within my power to enrich my daughters life, she is amazing.

How crap do I feel that I cannot afford a private school already and then read drivel from you.
Display a bit of tact, not everyone is afforded your choice.

Before you think I'm envious, I'm truly honestly not. I do not begrudge anyone anything at all and was brought up with better values than that.

I do however take offence when you're describing having no choice as being compared to slavery!
Your boys will probably grow up just like you, snobby and superior, when underneath we all bleed the same blood, we all are vulnerable to illness etc.

God forbid your "crash flow" problems actually meant you needed to rely on the poor children schools, you would really be mixing with the great unwashed and probably even see pyjamas.

Only 7% of children in this country are privately educated. God help the 93% who aren't

There are plenty of extremely bright children doing very well i in state schools.

Yorkie, your daughter is not being failed. No amount of money in the world can make up for what you clearly have with your dd.

And "going to state school" is not a synonym for "failed".FFS.

Great post Cinnamon.

For me, being fortunate enough to have the choice of private schooling means keeping my children at arm's length from government interference in their schooling. So I do get the OPs point. Planning for top senior schools does work rather better when started earlier although at that point you need to be open-minded about what might be right for your child when they are much older.

We didn't plan early; boarding schools weren't on our radar at all (also not UK born or educated). We have however come to appreciate that the older more prestigious public schools can have deeper pockets when it comes to being able to support families from a range of backgrounds. I am aware of more than one family where private day schools are unaffordable but a top boarding school can subsidise fees to what they can afford.

To the OP - hope things work out sensibly for prep for you. Knowing what I know now - having had 2 children in different preps, not in London - I would keep a close eye down the track on CE preparation / senior school transfer advice generally, if your children are in "right-through" schools. There could be a role for moving at 7 or 9. My youngest is yr 8 and we're in the throes of juggling senior school options - holding a (good) day place, a "provisional" offer from one boarding school that expects to assess again this term, but actually hoping to get a place via a scholarship at a 3rd school ... Worst case scenario could get expensive but I'm seeking advice as to how to negotiate sensibly. Our prep headmaster prides himself on not messing senior schools around and tries to avoid families ending up in our position, but it is what it is. Most of the rest of the year have reasonable certainty where they are going I believe. With both our children we've paid substantial deposits in yr 7 for yr 9 entry; at least with the eldest it was for the school she's ended up going to!

To others; trying to do the best in the present for my own children doesn't stop me wanting to do anything and support anything that will work towards improving the education on offer for all children. I do what I can and hope some day to do more.

Would be surprise if £50 k salary would even manage fees for one DC at Eton a year.

Am also surprised that your paid for education hasn't taught you the difference between lose and loose. Wouldn't always be so pedantic but you have repeated the mistake more than once.

Re your comments on choice within alternative political systems. It is no choice if you can't afford it. Much like healthcare.

Yorkie - you are not failing your daughter! Private education is not necessarily better. There are good state schools and bad ones, and there are good state schools and bad ones.

I was state through and through, but ended up at Oxford to study a very competitive and oversubscribed course. I had a whale of a time and am professionally and personally happy and successful now.

I feel I was better prepared for the necessary self-directed learning than my co-tutee who also bright and was educated at a top independent school.

This is of course anecdotal, but it not an unusual experience amongst my peers and colleagues.

I am intending to send my daughter to state school. I think learning isn't just about academics, and there is a better chance of her having the opportunity to experience more diversity and have a broader understanding of people and society this way.

Partway up thread, there was a statement about private education protecting society against totalitarian states. Well conversely, I do wonder whether the homogeneity of our recent/current batch of 'ruling class' politicians may just have had an influence on where we find ourselves currently.

OP - this is just my inherent bias. Don't worry about it. Regardless of which school is better, in your position, I would have just paid the £500 not to have to waste any more time agonising over the decision.

Of course that should read good and bad state and good and bad private schools!

You do realise your son will gave to pass a rigorous entrance exam to get into Eton? Its academic standards are high, and unlike many British public schools it doesn't take just any old rich thickos. (Unless they're royal )

I think learning isn't just about academics, and there is a better chance of her having the opportunity to experience more diversity and have a broader understanding of people and society this way.

Exactly, Secnarf. Unfortunately I suspect the OP, and many others like her who know the price of everything and the value of nothing, prefer a segregated society where their precious DCs are not exposed to the great unwashed.