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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This wedding is taking over my life and it's not even Mine!

31 replies

PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 14:57

Ffs friends of ours getting married and the stag dos and wedding has taken over every weekend in September and is costing a bloody fortune! We've commuted to it now and have had to cancel things to afford it ffs people and their weddings

OP posts:
McTufty · 16/09/2017 14:59

How has it taken up every weekend in September? One for the wedding, one for the stag/hen what are the other two for?

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:02

One weekend for stag that was abroad
One weekend generally running around for bride and groom ie suits
One weekend for wedding abroad
One weekend for wedding at home

OP posts:
KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 16/09/2017 15:04

Just go to one of the weddings.

And you don't need to run around for them.

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:08

Dp is best man so is going to both everything is booked for him to go abroad and the other wedding is locally so well both go to that

OP posts:
HerRoyalChocolateBunny · 16/09/2017 15:14

Sympathies.

Exhausting. Thanks

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:20

Seriously why don't people just have one local stag or hen Do? It's just over the top now

OP posts:
coddiwomple · 16/09/2017 15:27

sounds completely over the top if you feel that you must attend.
If you don't have the choice, try to see it as a mini-holiday for you, and a great party. Enjoy yourself as much as possible. It's their wedding, but you can still have a great time.

Until I had children, my group of girl friends and I quite like hen parties abroad. We didn't go to trashy place, had days in the sun and evenings partying, it was lovely. It never felt like a chore. I wouldn't even bother going nowadays, I am away enough for work as it is (and that's rarely, but I have kids!)

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:32

I'm not going to the wedding abroad I'm 32 weeks pregnant so it's just dp

OP posts:
Tinycitrus · 16/09/2017 15:32

I don't know how young people get the money to have such extravagant weddings.

coddiwomple · 16/09/2017 15:35

More people than you think earn a lot, even at a young age.
Others use live with their parents, have no outgoings, and /or use credit cards.

Fluffycloudland77 · 16/09/2017 15:35

Wedding invitations are a poisoned chalice these days. I'm glad neither of us have friends.

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:37

Seriously I dread another invite it's ridiculous. For our wedding we had local stag and hen dos and a local wedding. We arranged everything and no one was put out

OP posts:
GinUser · 16/09/2017 15:37

Sounds like a performance.
But why 2 weddings, is one of them not a "real" one?

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 15:40

One is abroad as she's from that country that's the official wedding. The other is here and its a party

OP posts:
Girlfrommars77 · 16/09/2017 15:56

Tbh, if bride is from the other country then I can see why they are having a celebration in each country....and that your DP needs to go as he's the best man. Are all the UK guests invited to the foreign one or just bridal party? And if DP is best man then a couple of days running round sorting things is kind of par for the course for taking on that role at a wedding..

Am with you on the foreign stag do though! And it must all be exhausting/frustrating when you're 32 weeks.

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 16:08

Yep weve had to cancel going away for our anniversary because this wedding crap deal is costing us so much it's bloody stupid

OP posts:
Yorkshirebetty · 16/09/2017 16:12

They obviously have plenty of money for such an outlay, but have to understand that not everyone has. They should be sensitive to other people's situations with expenses, have they just assumed you can afford it all?

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 16:52

Obviously they have. Seriously next wedding if it's not convienent I won't be going

OP posts:
carjacker1985 · 16/09/2017 16:54

It's a wedding not a summons- you should have declined, I'm sure they'd prefer a best man who wasn't going to be so pious about attending.

For the record, I think it all sounds OTT but it's their wedding they can do what they want.

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 16:58

Dp thinks its fine actually it's me who has the issue

OP posts:
carjacker1985 · 16/09/2017 17:09

Well in that case... tough titties, really. Best men are generally meant to go to the stag, pick up suits, and attend the wedding (or in this case, weddings). You just sound quite bitter about it all because you are pregnant- which is understandable, and you are entitled to... just as they are entitled to have the wedding they want. Just be grateful you only have to attend one of the four things on the list!

Subtlecheese · 16/09/2017 17:12

It's very needy and attention grabbing, it is a life changing thing to do BUT for the couple.
What do they all for this need once the wedding is over?

Original poster
PingPongSong · 16/09/2017 17:39

Yep hell is other peoples weddings

OP posts:
Mustardnowletsnotbesilly · 16/09/2017 17:41

I'm totally with you. When I got married I had a night out in London and they wedding was central London because all our mates live in London. I have been to weddings in Poland, Cuba, France... Its crazy....

HailLapin · 16/09/2017 17:44

Of course dp thinks it's fine! He's not missing out on going away is he? You're heavily pregnant , having to miss out on your anniversary treat and ending up down several hundred £££ anyway.

It does suck op.