AIBU to be fuming that DS has been sent home because of his hair???

[brodyblake]

DS had his haircut just before he started secondary school. In the uniform rules, it just saying no "extreme hairstyles" does not give any kind of description as to what those may be. Bugger me, he goes in with a perfect uniform, a nice smart haircut and is told it's a no!!! They have said that he is to be in isolation until it grows to an acceptable length they didn't say what would be classed as extreme!!!!!!!!

This sort of thing is so ridiculous. I'm convinced that the reason the UK has such a lot of subcultures and crazy stuff people do with their hair and faces and clothes is because of the utterly silly uniform rules in schools.

In countries with no school uniform kids are far more homogeneous in how they dress because there isn't this nonsense to rebel against.

yabu, everyone with kids knows that is extreme. why would you do that just before school starts?

A couple of years ago that might have been "extreme" (at a push) but it's pretty mainstream now, much as I'm sure your DS would like to think it's edgy.

The school is being ridiculous. Extreme is dyed unnatural colours, gelled into an actual mohawk (not a fauxhawk) or with stupid patterns or words shaved into the side. Not a mainstream haircut that doesn't even qualify as hipster any more.

Have you challenged it?

What if a child has afro hair?! Are they not allowed less that 3 even though it makes it more manageable?

Ridiculous anyway, asking as they are not pissing about with it in class then I don't see the problem. Ffs they want children to be drones.

Really horrible that they have put him straight in isolation.

Are you sure there is no info anywhere that gives guidance about length?

I would e mail his tutor and explain that you honestly did not consider it extreme, ask if it would help if the cut was evened up, or if there is anything else you can do. And explain about the terrible impact of his not knowing anyone in the school etc.

Is it one of these boot camp academies?

I am surprised at all the posters horrified that schools have these rules. It is increasingly common in secondaries. Thank goodness ours allowed any style, but it had to be natural colour. But a local Catholic school imposes isolation for the tiniest bit of growth past collar length for boys or anything shorter than a number 3 , even at sixth form, for example.

Isn't that just standard male hair cut?
DH and several of his friends have versions of that and they're responsible 30s+ employed boring men.
It's not any worse than an undercut and curtains which was haute couture in about 1995.

But how did the op know it would break the rules if the school hasn't properly defined the rules as to what an extreme haircut is?

And how on earth does it affect his, or anyone else's learning?

Yes, we can't have people being individuals can we.

And make the e mail co-operative and apologetic and explaining - not argumentative.

It's just a short back and sides with it being a bit shorter than what it used to be. How is it 'unacceptable'?

Holy Hell. I would be raising the bloody roof if I were you! My Ds aged 12 has long-ish hair, shoulder length with half his face covered the majority of the time. His hair, his choice.

How on earth does physical appearance detract from learning?!

To put him into isolation is absolutely outrageous. By that logic, you as the parent I assumed paid for it, therefor tell the school it is logical for you to be put in isolation!

Simply put, tell the head firmly he will not be punished. Most schools have inclusion policies, it sounds like his school are being twatts authoritarian.

This is mad. That haircut is a trend one that will pass as a fad. It's not to my taste but it looks sensible enough for school activities! Boys at my daughter's school wouldn't be allowed that either as the sides would be too close a cut (less than a 3)

It really annoys me when schools basically just ban things the moment they are fashionable. A 'skin fade' would have been called a "short back and sides" not that long ago and wouldn't have been considered extreme. When I was a teenager and boys all wanted long grunge hair or ravers' curtains hanging in their eyes, schools would have loved boys to smarten up with a nice sharp cut like that! The only reason schools decide that cuts like this are 'extreme' is because they're suddenly trendy.

When I was at school I got told off for having Doc Marten shoes (not the boots, the shoes). My dad pointed out that when my sister had been at the same school a decade previously and pointy slip-on shoes with little heels had been all the rage, the school had banned those and told parents that 'flat lace-ups' were preferable. But then flat lace-ups like Kickers and DMs became fashionable and, quelle surprise, suddenly the school didn't like them any more.

I do think school uniforms are important but rules that say you can't have certain haircuts are ridiculous. There is nothing outlandish or inappropriate about that sort of style. It looks neat and smart.

It's not allowed at the secondary school I know, it's not a style I'd expect anybody to consider to be suitable for school.

Look op, whether you agree with this or not you should be thinking what sort of example you are setting your son by your attitude to this.

Why oh why do so many parents these days think that school rules on uniform and appearance are there to be challenged?

Rules are rules and learning that fact will be an invaluable lesson to your son in later life.

Please don't set him such a poor example.

I've just dug it out (on The school website)

Our hair policy is that the childs hair should not be shorter than a 'number 3', although exceptions can be made if prior agreement is made with the school.
A shaved head is not appropriate for school.
If the hair is long enough to fit into a hair tie it must be tied up.

it's not a style I'd expect anybody to consider to be suitable for school.

Why isn't it suitable for school?
I don't understand how a haircut can be not suitable for sitting at a desk or doing PE?

@SusannahL - why didn't the school tell the OP the length his hair should be though?

Don't see the problem with any of these haircuts. Anyone who thinks they are 'extreme' really needs to get out a bit more.
What is the reason for not allowing shorter than number 3? As long as hair is clean and tidy, and tied up or back if longer than collar length, what is the problem?
It's really seems to have got to the stage of just making up stupid rules for the sake of it now.

I don't understand how a haircut is "unsuitable" for school. Having short hair does not have any impact on exam results, attendance, ability to learn, manners....

Why oh why do so many parents these days think that school rules on uniform and appearance are there to be challenged?

OP just said that they didnt clarify what is an extreme haircut

No white socks...dead easy

No extreme haircuts...apparently not so much

I think being in isolation long enough for his hair to grow is going to do more damage to his education than a fucking hair cut. Ridiculous! Everyone round here has that haircut so that would be 90% of the school in isolation.

So glad my DCs schools never had this kind of rule.

Here in Scotland we are simply not allowed to refuse on the basis of appearance. Even though schools push uniform they are legally not able to enforce any rules.