to not split the discount?

[schoolsaving]

Regular but NC as outing.

DS currently attends private school and fees split 50:50 with XH amicably but specific line 'school fees to be split 50:50' is in financial order. No maintenance paid as 50:50 care and clean break split with us i.e. no further claim on each other. Further relevant info is that since split I've reduced working hours and covered school holidays and XH has continued to work FT.

I've got a new full time job which includes 50% discount on school fees. Which of the below scenarios do you think is fairest?

A: fee discount reduces both our share and we split the cost of additional holiday childcare
B: fee discount reduces my share to nil and I pick up cost of additional holiday childcare
C: fee discount reduces my share to nil and we split additional holiday childcare

Thanks!

B or C.

Heart says C but I'd probably wimp out and do B.

🤣 🤣🤣 @ those saying "morally A".

Remember that most benefits are taxed

So for my private healthcare I actually pay for 40% of it in a tax hike ! Check the maths in this before you decide anything.

@brandnewhouse because I believe in treating people the way you wish to be treated. If roles were reversed I would hope he would do the same...and if he didn't then I would challenge it legally. Because, I'm sure if he challenged it he would win.
Or, maybe you could just put your big girl pants on an talk to him about it....

If ops ex suddenly started getting an extra bonus which was equal to half of the school fees should he then tell the op that he would then be covering 75% of the school fees?

Because the agreement said they'd pay half free fees each

There OP still hasn't mentioned what will happen in regulates to childcare? As she was able to cover the holidays and now can't, those fees also increase - how is he going to feel at having to cover additional holiday cover AND not get a discount of the fees? I.E. your costs have gone down at the expense of his going up?

My DH got a discount on school fees he was hit by a hefty tax deduction on personal allowance due to salary sacrifice so be careful!

I think I would say something in the ilk of,
I have been given a reduction on the school fees as part of my salary. at this time I don't know how much of this will be penalised by the tax man.
Up till now I have been able to take the weight/cost of the holidays,
I hope that you agree that if my new pay package ends up giving me a pay increase, with the increased hours. That my history of providing you with cheap/free child care during the holidays, will be taken into consideration with any claim to the reduction.

A or B IMO - follow order or offer XH to use discount for your share of fees & pick up hols childcare.

Basically I'm saying discuss it with him, not us, because the aim is to be amicable joint parents & do best by your son, right?

This is an interesting situation, OP. I think if the school has agreed to discount your child's termly fees by 50% then it's reasonable to assume that the total fees will now be half what they were previously. If your situation happened at my school, assuming that currently you and your ex receive separate bills for 50% of the fees, the default would be that you each have 50% off your share of the costs.

However, if both of you agreed it in writing, it would be fine to give you a 100% discount of your share and your ex to continue to pay his share in full. The best thing is to talk it through with your ex, then inform the school of how you want your invoicing to be arranged.

Seriously 80's Mum your school would take a salary benefit of one parent and share it with the other without their agreement? Given how many acrimonious divorces there are in the world and with all due respect your school does not know the situation parent 1 is in. For all you know the other parent was financially abusive and therefore no they won't put in writing that Parent 1 can keep all of THEIR discount that comes as THEIR salary benefit.

I'm just baffled at those thinking he should have a share of her salary benefit. If he gets a company car should OP get 50% use of that too?!

Good luck OP would be interesting to hear what you decided in the end

Basically I'm saying discuss it with him, not us, because the aim is to be amicable joint parents & do best by your son, right?

RTFT

But you only got this discount because you work for them... It's part if your job.. imo it doesn't matter how you pay your 50 percent .. It's still being paid.

If childcare goes up in holidays I would pay for half of them.