Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Update - missed Grammar School application

685 replies

sososocross · 13/09/2017 11:45

So many people have kindly sent pm and a couple of update threads have been started so I wanted to update.

Firstly I really want to thank you all for your help and kindness. I was in a state and without you all I would have lost the plot. You women rule 🏅

Update: They are not letting him do the test and I have told DS. I made the choice to tell him in a vague way and simply stated that something had gone wrong and his application had not been received. I will not lie to him if he asks for more details at a later date, but I couldn't take away his chosen school and his image of his dad in one cruel swoop.

He cried and asked me to sort it out, and I told him I had tried and couldn't. I told him my alternate plans and he relaxed. I also told him I would be coming home early 2x per week from here on, and we would work together on homework, extra study or whatever he chose. If he wants to register for the 12 or 13 plus I will do all I can to assist him. Then we watched guardians of the galaxy and had big cuddle up on the sofa.

So that's where we are.

I am sorry to those I irritated by deleting the thread, I was very worried about the daily mail and any come back. I hope you understand I was having a crisis and listed inappropriate details which could identify my son on the thread.

Please don't mention school details on this thread as I'd rather it all remain anonymous for his sake.

Thanks again for all the kindness, it meant the world to me.

OP posts:
JulietNeverMetRomeo · 21/09/2017 20:36

So pleased for you and your son. What a great update that has really made my day. Smile

Bratsandtwats · 21/09/2017 20:52

OP, you and your DS are amazing! I hope the exam goes well for him. I'm so happy he has been given another chance!
I also hope your DH now realises he needs professional help.

gingergenius · 21/09/2017 21:57

@redsquirrel2 well that's just shit! I had no idea! My kids go to a very very good comp and the local GS is over 45 mins away so had no need to consider a GS.

I did wonder why I never heard anything about the 11+ when my boys were in year 6! God how thick am I?!?!?

Naively I thought bringing back grammar schools might be a good thing. I can see by your comments I was ridiculously deluded. And horrified, actually! But Thankyou for the eye opener!

redsquirrel2 · 21/09/2017 22:11

@gingergenius Theresa May bangs on about grammar schools being good for social mobility, it's a load of old bollocks! The complete opposite. And where I live sadly the other schools are all Requires Improvement as the grammar schools cream off all the best kids and best teachers. And kids get bussed in from miles around, even from outside the county, to the grammar schools, it's an awful system. You're lucky to have a good comp, seems like a much fairer system to me.

redsquirrel2 · 21/09/2017 22:13

@gingergenius PS you're not thick! Just lied to by politicians!

gingergenius · 21/09/2017 22:15

@redsquirrel2 I think because I went to a GS I assumed it was still an inclusive system. No wonder the one nearest me is a bit 'private school' if you know what I mean?

I'm shocked I didn't realise. Note to self: pay more attention!

SeaEagleFeather · 21/09/2017 22:47

long time ago now ginger

Lot has changed.

steppemum · 22/09/2017 08:55

Holidayhooray:

my problem with the grammar system is not the grammar schools themselves, which do a great job for those kids who get in, hence my use of them for my kids.

My problem is the 80-90% of kids who don;t get in, and the lack of resources poured into their education. This has always been an issue, there was a promise of wonderful technical schools way back in the 60s which came to nothing for example. Secondary moderns were always the poor sister in the system, which is, frankly, outrageous.

We are in an odd area, a non grammar area with a grammar area over the county border, and our local system in all comp.
In some towns near us there are excellent comprehensive schools, which provide well for all students of all abilites. They use streaming etc to serve all abilities well.

But the comprehensive schools that are accessible to us in our town are pretty much universally crap.
There is a real problem with underacheivement and behaviour issues. No follow up on homework not handed in, large low level disruption normal in class. Many of them still teach without any streaming at all and i completely fail to see how you can teach English well to a mix ability class which contains kids who are working at age 10 and kids aiming for Oxbridge together in same class effectively. Neither group is served well by that.

So, no, I am not actively campaigning. I would speak out against new grammars being built. I do verbally suport schools trying to make a difference. But I use the system that exists, because my kids are FSM and they deserve any leg up they can get.

DeepfriedPizza · 22/09/2017 09:25

I am so glad your DS is getting his chance to sit the exam.
I hope you update us with the result in due course

Holidayhooray · 22/09/2017 18:04

So nothing

CrikeyPeg · 23/09/2017 22:07

Lovely to see your update OP :)

steliosdisappeared · 23/09/2017 22:39

Great result OP!

Good luck sorting the husband. Personally I'd give him one more chance IF he seeks help and displays a willingness to change his ways.

Original poster
sososocross · 30/09/2017 20:53

He did the exam today. Said it was hard but he finished all the sections and seems happy with what he achieved. Time will tell, roll on results day Smile

OP posts:
TheNext · 30/09/2017 20:54

Good luck sosocross. How long do you have to wait?

CruCru · 30/09/2017 20:55

Good luck to that boy. When will you know the results?

whiteroseredrose · 30/09/2017 20:55

Fingers crossed

MoiMocheetMechant · 30/09/2017 21:28

Ah fingers crossed OP! Good luck to you and your DS :)

Jessiegirl · 30/09/2017 21:32

Good luck to your wee boy. He can only do his best.

HPandBaconSandwiches · 30/09/2017 23:22

Really hope he's cracked it. At least either way, he and you have done everything you can, nothing to regret. What an amazing young man you have there.

Original poster
sososocross · 01/10/2017 08:05

Thanks so much, it's an excruciating wait but not long - 20/10 apparently

OP posts:
Apileofballyhoo · 01/10/2017 10:07

Soso, I just saw your update. I'm so so pleased your DS got his chance. You and your DH sound amazing.

I'm so glad your DH was able to sort this out. You have indeed achieved a huge amount together.

For your own sake, I'd suggest a bit of counselling for yourself. So that you don't get burnt-out. Flowers

DO3271 · 01/10/2017 10:09

He has done his best and worked hard, you can't ask for more Smile so now I hope for him he gets in, sounds like he deserves it

NewIdeasToday · 08/10/2017 19:44

So glad to hear this update. Well done to your son for working so hard. Fingers crossed for his results.

RidingWindhorses · 08/10/2017 20:10

Please come back and let us know how he does (if you can face it).

Original poster
sososocross · 19/10/2017 15:01

Sweet Baby Jesus it's results day a day early! OMG! DH has the envelope but has promised not to open it until I'm home. I am freaking out!

I will let you know but feel that he's unlikely to have done it - apparently there were 2000 kids for 360 places across 2 schools this year. Still, he did his best and we are proud no matter what :)

Not sure why I am posting this, for a hand hold I suppose - it's going to be a long long afternoon. I'll update.

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.