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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be furious about gender neutral bathrooms in work?

134 replies

Kez437 · 07/09/2017 15:57

At the start I'd like to make very clear that I am pro transgender and those who do not prescribe to a particular gender. However as context, we have 2 office sites, I am in site 2. Across the company and in particular on my site there are many more males than females (something the company is desperately trying to solve). There is not a great person to bathroom ratio but currently we have 2 females and 4 males so the men have double we have. As of yesterday, with no prior notice gender neutral signs have been put up on the doors of all the bathrooms. When this was queried with out office manager we were told that there were not enough bathrooms for the men and as there are more of them they are always having to wait. To my knowledge and I'm fairly certain we have no transgender of non-assingning people in our company or on this site and the reason given has nothing to do with this. As of today I have learnt that site 1, which is our head office does not have gender neutral bathrooms and that next week when a client visits us the gender neutral signs are being taken down! I am, quite frankly, furious. It seems to me that this is a poor effort of 'oh there are more of them, they need to use your bathroom but we can't just say that so we'll make them gender neutral'. Not a single woman on site has used the previous male bathrooms so effectively they have gotten their way. Gender neutral is being totally scapegoated and not used in its proper context. If they were so concerned about gender neutrality surely all the bathrooms, inlcuding those in the main office would be gender neutral and they wouldn't be taking the signs down for a client visiting? Or they could have male, female and gender neutral (personally I thing this is the best way forward which caters for all, those who assign to a gender and those who do not). I am properly fuming about this, am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
frieda909 · 09/09/2017 16:49

I genuinely could not care less about whether a man uses the same toilets as me, although morningrunner's post above about the legalities of all this is interesting.

What makes me angry is the fact that they're taking down the 'gender neutral' signs for a client visit! That sends all sorts of worrying messages. They can't claim to be all right-on and promoting gender equality when it suits them, only to shy away from it in front of clients. It also suggests that they think men and women sharing a bathroom is far from ideal and not something they want to inflict on clients, in which case why are they happy to make their employees do so?

Italiangreyhound · 09/09/2017 16:49

Morphine,"....when I really wouldn't want anyone saying 'yes its fine to feel like women just don't belong in the work place"

This is nothing to do with not having women in the workplace! The idea of laughable. Women work and if they didn't't the country would literally grind to a halt. It's how those women are treated that is the issue.

frieda909 · 09/09/2017 16:50

Never met a guy who would care about it.

That's interesting, KityGlitr, because my experience has been the exact opposite. I've know far more men who seem to have been squeamish about pooing in public toilets than women!

KityGlitr · 09/09/2017 16:54

Wow really Frieda? That's good to know it's not all men pro and women against across the board. Literally every man I know thinks it's crazy to mind doing a poo in a public toilet!

At least I'm discriminating equally against those I'll poo near 😂

Italiangreyhound · 09/09/2017 16:56

britbat23 I'm fully grown, thanks, so no need to grow up. your notions of middle eastern ideas are very off base. We do not only have this segregation in toilets but in changing rooms, prisons, hostels and hospitals, and all places where women may be vulnerable to males.

If you don't feel worried about men. Great. Nice for you. Lots of women do feel very nervous of random men for very good reason. And they don't want to share spaces where they will be alone/undressing/vulnerable etc.

Italiangreyhound · 09/09/2017 16:58

And some of is have IBS and don't have the 'luxury' of choosing set locations to pop. It's more any loo will do.

Italiangreyhound · 09/09/2017 16:58

Poo not pop!

frieda909 · 09/09/2017 17:20

I'm with you there Italiangreyhound! When I need to go, I need to go.

I could never understand people who talked about waiting until they got home from work/school etc to poo. The concept of waiting and choosing when or where to go is totally alien to me.

DJBaggySmalls · 09/09/2017 17:25

Women are not asking for this, men are. Its being foisted on to women over our protests.

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