AIBU to think that parents should buy the correct uniform and stop moaning

[Loveluck7]

I am getting increasingly irritated by people on FB moaning that their child's human rights have been violated because they were put into isolation for having the wrong uniform.

I understand that some rules can seem ridiculous but unfortunately some bad parents who have let their child wear spray on trousers and tiny skirts, have necessitated schools stipulating the exact items they need to wear.

Isolation does seem a harsh punishment when it is the parent's fault but how else can schools enforce the rules when some parent's think rules do not apply to them? The child cannot attend class without trousers and parent's would be angry if the child was sent home.

You also often find that it is these parent's who also complain when a school is no good at discipline, yet will not follow the rules themselves.

😂 Giles

'You have chosen to put your child in a school with a uniform policy. No one is forcing you to put your kid in there. '

RTFT! Plenty of places have only one catchment school. You go there or go nowhere. Education is compulsory. But you'll come back and say people can just homeschool their kids because you're a GF. In fact, based on your last post you sound like the one on the foodbank thread who claimed to work in a school where all 1700 pupils and their parents refused to support a foodbank because they just increase dependency. Load of bollocks spouted every time. LOL @ go to the library. There's one on every corner, of course!

Reminds me of the twats who all asserted that Europe shouldn't take in any refugees from wars in Syria or Africa because they had smartphones. They're fleeing a fucking war, not the 18th century.

I have not "chosen" to put my children in a school with a uniform policy. All the schools round here have expensive uniforms. It's also got more expensive since last year, as the school was academised and changed the uniform to something more old fashioned. All the old logo'd uniform straight in the rag bucket. It made me cry, the amount of money being wasted.

I don't know about other families, but I explained how I manage to have a smartphone, and why.

LOL @ go to the library.

LOL at you unable to read my post properly.
LOL at you calling me a GF because you do not agree with me, and LOL at you finding all sorts of excuses. You are right, it's easier to find excuses and rant on here than doing something. I am only on mumsnet when I am bored at my desk - or in the train - but I am still being paid. I wouldn't bother otherwise.

There are people who really struggle in this country, they don't have luxury, barely speak the language, but funnily enough they don't look for excuses. Never heard any of them complaining about uniforms either.

When you send your kids to school, you sign up to ALL their rules. This includes uniform and not taking holidays in term time and homework etc etc etc... if you don't like it homeschool. As simple as that. If you can't afford to homeschool, then looks like you need to suck it up and FOLLOW THE RULES. ALL OF THEM.

Off we go. Competitive poverty now.
Lots of people are in dire circumstances. We help all our big families and I personally took a young lady over to Asda who had lost her mum to cancer. She had no underwear or shirts. We do help. We aren't monsters.

Those vans the poster complained about with the 'tag' are not cheap. They are leather. Not plimsolls.

And all the passive aggressive 'I am a bad mother' whilst living in poverty is tiresome. 'He is being punished for my financial position'. Tell the school you are dealing with it and whine down the phone to them. If we know it's being actioned he would be able to leave.

@notanotherNC I agree. We give lots of warning and send reminders.
There are always those that argue the toss.

If they barely speak the language coddi, how would you know if you'd heard them complaining even if they did for some reason decide to share their views with you? You presumably don't understand every single language on earth.

The vans were £1 more than the marks and spencer shoes I bought the term before wanna but hey my child should not have 1 nice thing is that what you are saying?

Am I not allowed a moan?
Poor folk should never moan?
I have explained the shie situation so many times now.
Yes I do feel like a shit mum sometimes and I do hate it when the fact we are poor is highlighted.
You clearly need to put down others to make yourself feel good.
I know I am not the scum you think I am. But I think you are exactly the kind of person that you have shown yourself to be.

*get over ourselves. You have chosen to put your child in a school with a uniform policy. No one is forcing you to put your kid in there. I know at least of a couple of schools in London - because it's where I happen to be based - where there are no uniforms. There are options. If you do not agree with the school, put them somewhere else! Don't have a go at parents like me who are happy with the uniforms, the principle and the policy in place and maybe have chosen the school because there's a uniform in place.

I don't agree with everything the school does, I am not quiet about it, and with other parents, we try to find solutions or other ways to do things. The state school system offer so much help to parents who need it, it's a bit unreasonable to pretend there's nothing.*

Coddiwomple - I have to disagree with you saying that you choose to put your child in a school. In London that may be the case, or big cities I can assure you it's not the case everywhere. My DD attends the closest school, there are 4 within a 20/25 mile radius. School transport is available for your child to the closest school. One school is in a different county so she is not entitled to a place, the two remaining are 2 service buses and about 90 mins away. And I don't drive due to it being unsafe (medical) - so really I'm not choosing the school am I? One she cannot attend, two are not feasible, or safe for a child of 11 to do unaccompanied, that leaves one. I have no issue with her schools uniform policy because as I explained earlier it's easy to access and reasonable to buy. But I'd be stuffed if I wasn't in the position to afford the uniform as for various reasons, only one school is accessible. As I want the best for DD I also don't feel that home education with me would be in her best interests.

Thing is, you can't plan for the cost of raising your children. People who thought they were relatively OK eighteen months ago wouldn't have been able to plan for the appalling impact of Brexit on the economy, for example. You can't plan for deranged surges in the housing market, or the government introducing yet another way to take money from the poor and give it to the rich (allowing unrestrained price rises by energy companies or whatever).
And you can't plan for having a child with SN who needs full-time care, or for one of your family members to get ill or have an accident which means that person needs full time care and therefore at least one adult in the family must stop work to provide that care.

And many, many people can't choose what school they send their DC to. Nor is it a matter of 'you signed up for this' - very often people don't sign up for a school full of petty tyranny, but all of a sudden the leadership gets changed and there's an influx of dumbfucks who think that making all the kids dress like some spanking afficionado's wank fantasy will 'improve' the school, and that more frequent and harsher punishments are necessary.

One of the reasons I picked DS' current school (yes, we live in an area with some choice but many don't) was that, on my initial visit to look at the place I saw untucked shirts and straggling ties worn by bright, happy, engaged kids. Now they've a new head and too many rumours about 'tightening up' and raising 'standards' (which rarely means ;improving the actual education the kids are getting, anyway).

I'm keeping an eye on things. If I see too much idiocy on behalf of senior management, then I'll be putting them straight/mobilising other parents/stirring it up as much as possible. Many teachers loathe this sort of shit as well, and it would be good to see a lot more schools basically standing up to the Government, who keep putting clueless bullies in charge of education and issuing completely contradictory regulations that waste everyone's time and harm children and families as well as teaching staff.

The gaslighting of Cosmic on this thread causing her to have to repeat herself several times is disgusting. She has clearly said the shoes did NOT breach policy 8 weeks ago.

There are many young girls living in poverty missing school because they cant afford to buy sanitary towels. How many schools are involved in a drive to donate some. Instead of investing time persecuting poorer parents even more. I donated sanpro to the food bank yesterday. Period poverty is a problem which is causing many girls to miss school. In 2017.

And as this is a problem surely its not too much of a stretch to see that stupidly expensive uniforms compound the problems of poverty. They dont reduce it or make it an even playing field.

Without access to sanpro girls in this situation also have a real fear of leaking onto their uniform. They cant afford to risk it. Expensive uniforms compound this problem add more pressure and cause exclusion.

Good to see you back on here SGB

As a non-Londoners I know that there certainly are plenty of non uniform schools in London. You would be hard pressed to find one outside of the M25 though Coddiwomple and as academies become more competitive, they make more and hitleresque uniform regulations, so there is little choice in the matter for non-Londoners not that you would be expected to know that with it being the centre of the universe and all that. All the 5 secondary schools in my town are academies.

Oh, coddi's all about competitive poverty, and namechanging. And is Britain's greatest source of knowledge on every single person in the UK and their personal circumstances.

Non uniform secondaries are not common in London.
There are non in my borough apart from a special needs school.
Good luck getting your child in a school out of borough.

I don't think we should teach our kids blind obedience. Teach them to question the rules and have the courage to stand up for what they believe in. They may want to go along with the rules in order to do well in the institution they are in and become successful but I would like to teach them to think carefully about what success means to them.

I also work with families in poverty.
The only ones without smart phones are those with no recourse to public funds who are living on handouts from church groups and charities.
Smart phone is the new Flatscreen tv.

Smartphones are mainstream.
Its impossible to apply for benefits and jobs without the internet

So can we stop with the bollocks because its tedious and distracting.

Penggwn I don't think anyone is objecting to the basic rule of school uniform. I think most of us support it, but some of the examples on this thread clearly are unjust and should be objected to and not blindly obeyed.

Any school with prohibitively expensive uniforms does not have their pupil's best onterests at heart and are therefore not entitled to respect and compliance.

This thread has moved on a bit since the OP's original post. Someone upthread was surprised that the kids at Christ's Hospital chose to keep their uniform - I'm not surprised. It is a bit weird but it is at least interesting (and authentic). I'd prefer that to having kids in horrible polyester blazers (which seem a pointless bit of clothing) and girls in see-through blouses and ties (why on earth should girls wear ties?).

People need phones to use the internet, job centres have closed and so have libraries because of this high end government SO if you need to register for work how are you meant to do if your local job centre and library has been closed because of cuts?

Disrespecting people who are not very affluent is an awful trait and obviously nobody knows what's round the corner and they may find themselves unable to pay those credit card bills.

Ivory towers fall down

"Teaching your children to respect the rules of the institution they belong to isn't 'blind obedience'"

It is though.

Petty burocrats spend their lives thinking up and enforcing stupid rules and would not like any child of mine to grow up to be like that.

How are these schools going to deal with parents being transferred over to Universal Credit. There is a six to eight week break with no money coming in (some are waiting 10 weeks or more) the priority will be to buy food toiletries and sanpro not uniform.

Up to 50 towns and cities are being transferred this November and December so very close to Christmas too (our town in October) its going to be hell for many.