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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

AIBU to think that parents should buy the correct uniform and stop moaning

740 replies

Loveluck7 · 06/09/2017 17:07

I am getting increasingly irritated by people on FB moaning that their child's human rights have been violated because they were put into isolation for having the wrong uniform.

I understand that some rules can seem ridiculous but unfortunately some bad parents who have let their child wear spray on trousers and tiny skirts, have necessitated schools stipulating the exact items they need to wear.

Isolation does seem a harsh punishment when it is the parent's fault but how else can schools enforce the rules when some parent's think rules do not apply to them? The child cannot attend class without trousers and parent's would be angry if the child was sent home.

You also often find that it is these parent's who also complain when a school is no good at discipline, yet will not follow the rules themselves.

OP posts:
Basecamp21 · 07/09/2017 17:05

Just abolish uniforms and let kids wear what they want....i don't understand why schools spend so much time and energy instilling in kids that external image is so important.

We try to teach our children it is what's inside that counts and personal appearance is a very superficial thing to focus on.

wannabestressfree · 07/09/2017 17:28

@CosmicPineapple I have never described you as 'scum' nor would I. I also would never be horrible or highlight your self perceived poverty. I think your being hugely melodramatic.

I receive in work benefits and work partially due to severe ill health. I live in a housing association property and know what it's like to have to scrape to buy my three children shoes and clothes. I also know the cost of leather vans.

I think it's a shame your school allowed your son to wear the shoes then changed their minds. As i highlighted earlier we all need to sing from the same hymn sheet. I get my 'kicks' from helping those who need it at school as I have said we readily do.

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 17:28

Update on shoe gate if anyone cares Grin

DS's new HOY called me and apoligised for yesterday. DS was still upset this morning so she spoke to him as he was sent to iso.

DS gave her the note and explained that I had borrowed money to buy new ones at the weekend. She said that the shoes without the tab meet the rules as they are black leather with no visible logos. So no need to change them.
She also said that things were hectic yesterday with over 70 children sent to isolation and had she seen his shoes she would have allowed them and sent a message to me to ask for the tab to be removed.
A further 60 were sent to iso today and around 30 more were excluded as they refused to go to iso again. These were mostly shoe related.

I apologised for the shoes and said I was still going to buy new ones as I did not want any misunderstandings next week about the shoes.

I still feel shit but I have a victim mentality so i am used to it Grin

MaisyPops · 07/09/2017 17:30

cosmic
That sounds like a very sensible HOY (and one who was probably swamped at the start ofterm).

Glad it's sorted.

PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 17:32

Thanks for update Cosmic and pleased that your ds shoes are deemed ok but honestly all those kids in isolation says to me that a nazi nutjob is at large in the school.

Hope you're ok and please ignore the awful remarks on this thread.

Pengggwn · 07/09/2017 17:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 17:37

ok but honestly all those kids in isolation says to me that a nazi nutjob is at large in the school.

A few months ago ofsted came in and shut the school the following day to allow them to make improvements.
A new head was announced at the end of term to start this week.
Apparently he has come in all guns blazing and its him who said no to tge tiny logo.
The kids arrive at school fora 8:20am start. DS said by the time they all lined up outside to be inspected it was 8:45 before he got to class.

Aderyn17 · 07/09/2017 17:38

I wonder if the hoy saw this thread.

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 17:40

Hope you're ok and please ignore the awful remarks on this thread.

Yes I am thank you.
I need to remember that on mn unless you are rich and perfect you are firsr course for the vipers Wink

PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 17:42

Grin yes quite right

HelenaDove · 07/09/2017 17:43

So thats 90 kids that didnt get to class today. 60 in iso and 30 excluded for refusing iso.

Absolutely ridiculous.

Glad things are a bit better Cosmic.

PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 17:45

Yep how stupid, denying 90 kids their lesson.

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 17:47

So thats 90 kids that didnt get to class today. 60 in iso and 30 excluded for refusing iso.

According to the HOY yes or there abouts. She sounded frazzled. She taught older DS so we know each other and she us a very experienced HOY so it suprised me tbh.

She was lovely and could not say sorry enough. I am a bit embaressed that she knows I am a bit short on funds but at least DS does not have to worry.

HelenaDove · 07/09/2017 17:49

Shes probably frazzled because shes under pressure from the Head.

RainbowBriteRules · 07/09/2017 17:54

Cosmic Flowers, what a joke. The teachers may even want the parents to complain if the head is so awful.

Pengggyn, the danger with teaching obedience first and critical thinking second is that it produces adults who blindly do stupid, dangerous or cruel things by following orders then by the time they are allowed to question those orders the damage is done.

flippinada · 07/09/2017 18:01

Cosmic glad you got a good outcome. Your HOY sounds very sensible.

ReanimatedSGB · 07/09/2017 18:04

'Obedience first' is not suitable for anyone capable of reasoning. Yes, it's reasonably applicable to toddlers, but needs to be stepped down in increments as DC get older.

Given that we currently live in a world where those with power/money mistreat, lie to and steal from those with less, I think the more active subversion of rules and rebellion we can teach our DC, the better. This includes teaching them that respect needs to be earned and teachers on a petty power trip should not be feared but rather pitied as they are clearly inadequate.

Pengggwn · 07/09/2017 18:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pengggwn · 07/09/2017 18:06

This reply has been deleted

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PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 18:09

Hear hear reanimated I totally agree

RainbowBriteRules · 07/09/2017 18:09

Pengggwn, of course I don't have all the answers but am damn sure that having 90 kids miss out on proper lessons is due to trivial rules badly applied. I suspect adults could do with a few lessons in what is trivial.

I teach adults sometimes and spend a lot of time undoing blind rule following.

VanillaSugar · 07/09/2017 18:11

I've just spent sixty quid on lace up shoes for DS and he's only gone and stepped in dog shit. I'm too posh to clean them so I have to buy him new shoes now.

^misses the point of the thread*.

PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 18:13
Grin
Pengggwn · 07/09/2017 18:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Aderyn17 · 07/09/2017 18:18

Cosmic, I wouldn't replace the shoes now. Hoy has said they are okay amd you've cut the labels off so you might as well.

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