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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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AIBU to think that parents should buy the correct uniform and stop moaning

740 replies

Loveluck7 · 06/09/2017 17:07

I am getting increasingly irritated by people on FB moaning that their child's human rights have been violated because they were put into isolation for having the wrong uniform.

I understand that some rules can seem ridiculous but unfortunately some bad parents who have let their child wear spray on trousers and tiny skirts, have necessitated schools stipulating the exact items they need to wear.

Isolation does seem a harsh punishment when it is the parent's fault but how else can schools enforce the rules when some parent's think rules do not apply to them? The child cannot attend class without trousers and parent's would be angry if the child was sent home.

You also often find that it is these parent's who also complain when a school is no good at discipline, yet will not follow the rules themselves.

OP posts:
CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 10:31

I don't agree with what she has done in this situation

What is it I have done?
I cecked with HOY in April that tge shoes were suitable. Answer was yes.
DS has worn them all sunmer up till end of July.
He went back yesterday in the exact same pair I bought in April. They are not new. I have not replaced them they are the same ruddy pair of shoues I bought in April as I could not afford to replace them.
Now they are deemed unsuitable and DS was told he will be in iso everyday until I get new ones. I do not get paid until next Thursday.

It is not a valid thing to do, to play the victim, when people do not agree with you

I am not playing the victim. You are being shitty towards me, am I not supposed to feel anything about that? Am I not allowed to feel crap when somebody like you calls me names?

I am sorry if my feelings are aggressive I dont mean them to be.

Fresh8008 · 07/09/2017 10:33

YABU for using Facebook.

YABU for trying to take away parents attempts to get in the Daily Mail.

YANBU with regards to school uniform. Parents should just buy the correct stuff, fecking idiots.

Aderyn17 · 07/09/2017 10:33

Loveluck, you make me want to bdng my head against a wall! What exactly has cosmic done wrong, apart from not have spare money to indulge the latest whim of the school?

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 10:35

YANBU with regards to school uniform. Parents should just buy the correct stuff, fecking idiots.

Wow

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/09/2017 10:36

Easy Ad

She dared to buy a pair of shoes several weeks ago instead of putting the money into a "penis extension" fund.

noeffingidea · 07/09/2017 10:39

Bearfrills sounds cool. See, there's a reason for them wearing uniform.
There's nothing wrong with uniform in itself, if it's affordable and practical. There's no need for school children to wear kilts with logos on, blazers with coloured trim, shirts and ties and all the rest of it.
My son is working in retail at the moment, he's wearing ordinary black shoes, black 'office' trousers, and a polo type top in the company's colours and logo. He has no problem wearing it and manages to do a full days work and represent an international company. Yet children as young as 4 are expected to wear ridiculously over priced uniforms with petty and unneccesary rules.

PortiaCastis · 07/09/2017 10:39

Keyboard warriors are out in full force today Angry

Aderyn17 · 07/09/2017 10:40

Cosmic, there really is no arguing with stupid. Unfortunately quite a few stupid people appear to be setting school uniform policy!
I don't know how schools can be full of educated adults seemingly unable to grasp that they are penalising the very children that uniforms were introduced to protect.

Loveluck7 · 07/09/2017 10:42

Bearfrills, please don't make things up. At no point have I called cosmic a bad parent. Read my original post and see that I said that bad parents bought their kids spray on trousers and tiny skirts, which had nessesitated strict rules. Nothing to do with cosmics situation. I do think Cosmic is "one of those parents that don't follow the rules and then moans" but not a bad parent who's sends her kid into school in spray on trousers and tiny skirts.
Please do not try to stir up trouble by taking things out of context.

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 07/09/2017 10:43

love

You haven't explained what rule she broke.she checked with the school first.before she got them

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 10:46

I did follow the rules.
I checked with school in April.
They have only made 1 uniform change which is a gold tie for y11.

Where have I not followed the rules?

Loveluck7 · 07/09/2017 10:48

Gileswithachainsaw; as choc said, if the school really did not give her at least 6 weeks fair warning of the rule change then she should insist her son be allowed to wear them. However, if she was given fair warning (as all schools usually give) then she needs to buy him the right shoes. I find it hard to believe that the rule change was made on the first day of term with no warning, very unlikely.

OP posts:
noeffingidea · 07/09/2017 10:49

Don't be silly Cosmic you forgot to buy a crystal ball so that you could predict the rules would be changed in the future Grin.

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/09/2017 10:52

So she's lying? Is that what you are saying?

chockwockydoda · 07/09/2017 10:55

I think the point is that instead of spending the time taking the shoes and the child into the school and saying these were fine in April. I have now cut the label out. He will now wear said shoes to his lessons and you will say nothing. Cosmic has spent all morning telling us how shit it all is and she's skint and works full time and she had to replace shoes and she's got no time to do that and life is shit and chock is shit and love is shit and live is just SO FUCKING SHIT.

that was the point of the original post. People who moan like a whore then do fuck all to fix it

Loveluck7 · 07/09/2017 10:57

Giles
I think that the rule change was published by the school and if it was not she needs to stand up for herself. The in between "woe is me" act is not very useful. I do also think saying over and over that she checked in April when the term ended 3 months later is a bit disingenuous.

OP posts:
flippinada · 07/09/2017 10:58

Christ, there are some unpleasant people about this morning.

Cosmic you haven't done anything wrong here and most of us do get it Flowers.

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/09/2017 10:59

But you think she's wrong so in your eyes there's nothing to stand up against is there ?

noeffingidea · 07/09/2017 11:00

Love so what do you think she should have asked in April then?
Are these shoes ok and will they still be ok in September?

Bearfrills · 07/09/2017 11:01

love, today at 8.50 you posted I think you are the type of parent I'm talking about. You then go on to state cosmic is passive aggressive and claiming victimhood.

You are being judgemental and that is not me trying to stir up trouble.

Please do explain why you think none of these things are judgemental?

Gileswithachainsaw · 07/09/2017 11:02

And this happened yesterday ffs.

How can she get time off so early at such short notice

Aderyn17 · 07/09/2017 11:02

Cosmic is understandably very upset because her child was bullied by the school yesterday. It is hard to not be emotional about that.
You and love have been total bitches on here.

CosmicPineapple · 07/09/2017 11:03

neo Grin

then she needs to buy him the right shoes.

I cannot afford new shoes hence why he is wearing the ones I bought in April.

I appreciate you maybe finding this difficult to grasp but I have no money until payday.

I have saved since January as I do every year to kit out 4 DC for September.
£400 did not stretch as far as I hoped so DS13 is wearing his old school shoes until I could buy more.

If I had the money do you not think I would just buy him new ones?
I have borrowed from my mum so will sort it at the weekend.

I cannot do it sooner as I work full time.
I am not near a primark or aldi.
I cannot get over to see my mum until Saturday for the money.
I work full time so cannot just not work and sort it.
These are not excuses OP they are facts.
I am sorry that my my life seems like one long excuse to you but I cannot help that.

chockwockydoda · 07/09/2017 11:03

Giles

Go to your manager and state what has happened and ask if you can leave early or come in late and not take lunch. Most people are human enough to say that's fine. She can sit on the internet all day at work

Bearfrills · 07/09/2017 11:04

cosmic has already stated the the rule change was not published, the only rule change published was a change to the school tie.

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