Next doors 5 year old kid has been screaming late at night for the past 3 years. Seriously destroying our quality of life.

[sleeplessneighbour]

They moved in around 3 years ago with their toddler, back then he screamed all day every day. Never ending tantrums. When they put him to bed at 6pm he would scream and yell for up to 2 hrs before finally exhausting himself, but often some time after midnight he would wake up again and start yelling and screaming.

For the first year this happened every single day, and I'm not exaggerating. We called over at one point (with wine and a smile I might add!) to talk to them about it and see if there was a solution we could work out. They were immediately defensive and sent us away saying that this is what kids do and refused to entertain any suggestions of moving him to a different part of the house or attempting to soundproof his room.

Over the years he does it less frequently (around 1/2 times a week) but now he is bigger he is even louder. I hear it through earplugs. It's audible in other rooms of the house and not just the one immediately adjacent to his.

I'm at my wits end. I opened my window one night and yelled at him to 'shut up' as he'd been screaming for 20 mins at 2am and the parents were upstairs in their loft conversion apparently oblivious.

WTF do I do? This is getting past the point of acceptable and has been going on for so long now that I doubt he'll ever grow out of it. Can any parents with experience of kids like this help me with how to approach them? We're a bunch of late 20's/early 30s professionals who have 1 party a year and are early to bed. We cause zero disturbance to any of our neighbours.

Any and all help appreciated, thanks from a desperate bunch of tired people.

We have had neighbours in the past who had screaming children. They were really badly behaved and used to really piss us off when we were in our garden trying to enjoy some peace and quiet.

It was a glorious summer and we took to eating outside most evenings
and playing our music very loudly. OP, make it uncomfortable for them as it is for you. Worth a try!

An idea that may be effective... call the police.

As daft as it sounds when my Ds was a baby we had the police call round one night because there had been a call by a passer by about a child screaming. They came in to check everything was ok and left. We was just having a very bad night and I was sat in his room feeding, putting down, scream cycle. It might shock them a bit into trying to deal with it more effectively

I totally sympathise with the OP. 2 doors away, we have a family with four DC. For a full year, the youngest girl screamed non stop every time she was on the garden. She is neurotypical, her elder sister would wind her up for a laugh and she would scream relentlessly for literally hours. Mum is not well, dad is fine but thinks that he can just put all the kids in the garden and totally ignore them.

We used to get on well until we'd finally had enough one day and went round after hours of solid screaming to complain. We couldn't even go in the garden. It ruined four summers. It only stopped when the elder sister ran off with her boyfriend and was cut off by the family for being pregnant and the little one grew up.

Neighbour noise has caused me to move before, extreme solution, but I was being driven crazy, I had to go.

Has the child got a condition or disability that has not been formally diagnosed, and therefore help not sought? I wonder if making enquiries via local GP or social services could be an option. It is not normal and if the toddler when a school child this continues, could cause real issues in their education.

What newt lover said. It's not sounding like anything that can be quickly fixed so I'd get some decent ear plugs to try and preserve your sanity and sleep.

I wouldn't be able to cope with it long term - we have a screamer near us but both houses are detached and I can only hear them with theirs and our windows open, thankfully. It's a dreadful noise and very stressful to listen to.

Poor little lad - sounds a miserable existence for him.

Maybe the child has a medical condition, or suffers night terrors? Don't assume the parents don't care, and just because you had good intentions by going round there to talk, they don't have to tell you that their child does or doesn't have a condition! Maybe they were having an off day perhaps? Or maybe your tone indicated you weren't being as polite and friendly as you are making out? Try going round again, with the sole purpose of just apologising. You aren't the only ones going through it- the parents are too. And shouting at a child is NEVER acceptable.

Tell the landlord to go round. Let the landlord know that you are thinking of moving and that they will have a hard job keeping Tennants if it carrys on.

A child shouldn't be screaming for that long and that loud :( he will be miserable and stressed.

Obviously we don't know but if the parents are ignoring it and hoping it stops it's cruel. I'd call the non emergency police and ask for advice. The parents may need help

I'd rather sit cuddling my child all night than hear them that distraught

You made the Daily Mail. www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4866116/How-cope-neighbours-screaming-child.html

Fucking knobs!

What fucking idiots, She's probably got no chance of resolving this with the neighbours now if the read that.

"I'd rather sit cuddling my child all night than hear them that distraught"

That doesn't work with some children. With some it makes them more distressed.

You can really tell the chavs were first to comment on this thread.

How do you know the kid is unattended? Why do people assume that if a child is crying there's no one with them? My twins scream a lot through the night even though we are there holding and feeding them.

I don't think it is really helpful to speculate about the child having special needs or if the parents don't bother or whatever else. If the child is screaming constantly then something is wrong; if the parents don't want to discuss then I think that the most helpful advice is to contact social services or the police.If there is an issue the professionals can deal with it . And I don't think it is helpful to say 'just move' . The next people to move in could be far less tolerant; I think only someone who was completely deaf would be able to ignore the screaming. And if the child was being neglected wouldn't it be better to find out now? I understand that it is stressful if a child has SN and that there is no instant solution ,also that support is sadly lacking but sleep deprivation when the child isn't yours is also unfair.

I see that a few dim DM readers think that return of the mitten is actually being serious...

Whatever they are doing obviously is not working. But why don't you try soundproofing your wall some?

Three years at the same time every night sounds like it is time to send someone to check on him and making sure they are not abusing him (sorry, just read how a grandma put her child in a cage every night

*grandchild. Not child. They don't know where the biological parents are

Someone who is deaf allow their kids come to them if they have a problem, not scream for hours (or check on them frequently)Both of my kids come to me at night and I am completely deaf without my cochlear implant

Scorpio, thank you.I am doing just fine