Fucking Cunting Trolls

[MsHooliesCardigan]

In the past week, I have posted on threads about someone's 15 year old niece taking their own life and today somebody wanting to give their 4 year old son up for adoption. They both turned out to be trolls. I love Mumsnet, I really do and I have seen many situations where those in genuine need of support have been massively helped. I have PMed a Mumsnetter at 4am asking her to call me if she wanted to talk after she had been assaulted by her DP. She did and we subsequently met up.
I have had a huge amount of support myself from Mumsnet but I am getting really weary of it now.
I work in mental health and it's something I feel really passionate about which is why I was drawn to the threads I've mentioned.
I know that there isn't much anyone can do about it and I think MNHQ do their best as both these threads were taken down pretty quickly.
Just needed to rant

I agree that if you have to name-change to post for advice on something sensitive, perhaps seeking help in real-life is the better option.

I'm continually astonished at the level of personal information people provide.

Even with a name-change, the protagonists will recognise themselves and therefore, the OP.

Mumsnet is an open forum, easy pickings for lazy journalists, and before you know it, your incredibly private dilemma is being discussed on The Wright Show.

The privacy thing isn't just a case of being a grownup and measuring your risk though. The nature of MN means that there's a whole bunch of poonami/toddler toilet training/tantrums/children's medical details/puberty/teen mental health stuff out there posted over a decade or more, that could make a sensitive fifteen year old's life hell if it was revealed at school and their school "friends" felt so inclined.

I've been lurker since dawn of time before joined no boobie bonus prize for that.

It's supposed to be an forum that claims many things one being support where you can chat about all kinds of life's arse aches as life isn't always peachy for everyone.

Some have a hard time seperating when someone posts about different issues as always some bored fucker likes to point it out in the thread about past which brings in the pile of minions.

Not everyone has someone to talk to in rl even after the much rolled out advice get a hobby and join a club. Another reason why some come here, problem shared and all that.

I don't believe anyone wants there posts to end up in DM and maybe I stupid but I thought MN have copyrights so does that mean we being sold out or have I got it wrong.

Trolls are part of Internet life but I don't know of any forum that I've been member of that has such a huge amount of Tollery

The fact can't edit has it pros and cons one that once you given details so not to be accused of drip feeding you can't go back and take out those few identity details.

I'm about to ask to swap my longtime member badge for removal of my posts and name changes due to something ugly in my past finding me. So if I come back I will the are you new and consider a troll

And people also share information which is not theirs to share. "My aunt took that pill without following the guidance closely and it gave her hallucinations and she nearly crashed her car, so do take those warnings seriously" is helpful advice under conditions of anonymity, but if you and hence your aunt have your identity revealed it's a very wrong disclosure.

I think the very nature of a parenting site means you’re sharing information that isn’t yours to share – people here talk about partners, children, siblings, parents and it’s often very private stuff, which isn’t nearly as anonymous as people think.

If you post about your teen’s self-harm and depression issues in one place, and have posted in education about how you’re choosing between two well known public schools, and posted somewhere else about how you’re going on holiday to Barbados this summer, and own two horses, then for anyone who knows that school it won’t be hard to pinpoint your DD who may well not appreciate some random person knowing all the details of their MH.

Mumsnet is incredibly public and I don’t think secure at all. Name changing makes it slightly more so, but not much. I try and change some details every time I name change, or use certain usernames for specific subjects and move between them so no one has the full list of DCs ages/occupation/hobbies/medical history etc.

Someone disclosed that their XXXX was HIV positive - it was an long term poster who had given out lots of personal info over the years. I pm'ed her to let her know that it was easy to find out her name, her address and her XXXXs name and suggested she delete the posts and be more careful in future. It's shocking how careless people are.

I'm always a bit that people are so free and easy with their DCs information. A level results, mental health issues, diagnoses', salaries etc etc, just why would you do that if you are identifiable. Share your own information if you like but not other people's.

Ffs. I was actually trying to work out the trans BF one and it poofed before I had got through comments

The thing is, Sparkling, even without advanced searching, I remember that you have rather a nice cat, and a child who had school issues similar to one of my own lot. If I knew you, I'd half-recognise the cat, confirm it from the school thing, and definitely raise an eyebrow if I saw your usual name on, say, a swingers/boss-hating/shall I swindle my aunty thread.

So I namechange for my own threads asking how best to swindle my aunty or murder my boss.

Yes I am not going to ask for murdering advice any time soon or join a swingers club.

DS2 went round to his mates house and told mates mum about MN and what my NN was. Don't know if she ever joined.She would recognise the cat for sure.

Superb. Is there a specific Murder Advice thread or will here do?

It's all well and good playing it safe all the time on MN but sometimes you might need to offload or talk about something that's personal etc so NCing comes in handy for that.

It seems to me that if you have to name-change to say something, then maybe you shouldn't be saying it.

I have name changed a few times to talk about one particular subject, as a few people know me on here.

Name changing is useful to people in very sensitive situations (personally, emotionally, physically), as well as the hairy handed.

I doubt many people would be happy to post about anal fistulas or uterine prolapse concerns if they thought that their NDN would recognise them

The message I have consistently given my teenage daughter is that stuff you post on the internet can be misused and hang around forever, therefore you never post anything online you wouldn't be happy for your granny to see or read. I'm certainly guilty of not adhering to that 100 % but some people on here need to give their head a wobble about the amount of oversharing they do.

So you have to be a familiar name to post about something that you want advice on, to prove you not a troll?

Does that mean pack of wolves will be restrained?

Yet im confused can't give any information that will pick you from a line up but you need all info to get a full picture before you might be helpful and offer advice? Or am I completely wrong and should we just talk about what to do for dinner?

Ok so I have something very personal that want advice about, that can't talk to nobody in real life and don't want to be identified or people's perception be clouded from all the cooking sub forum I post in.

Is this acceptable? As I have done that only cooking sub forum is a fib. I feel I was lucky as I got some great advice, wouldn't post now as I get eaten alive.

I don't think stopping name changing will change anything as so easy to get throw away email to sign up.

This all goes back to listening to members who I've learnt are pretty savy on knowing what's bullshit or not without being reprimanded

People should be able to post without fear of being a troll and I hate to say it, but this is the only forum I look at a post and wonder if it is a troll before I click on the link. I am not on many forums but enough to be able to say this is not normal, where every other thread on active is probably a troll.

As someone else has already said, if you have a problem avoid AIBU, Chat, go and find the actual topic, you might not get a lot of answers, but I bet that you would get the right ones.

Superb. Is there a specific Murder Advice thread or will here do?

There was a 'How to Murder Subtly and make it look accidental' thread a while back -- possibly nominally in Creative Writing, but you never know quite what its genuine purpose might have been...

I missed that one Lance

Here you go, Sparkling, enjoy!
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/creative_writing/2576731-Help-Need-inspiration-on-how-to-kill-someone