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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DS can walk in pjs in the evening?

104 replies

pjdrama · 31/08/2017 21:29

DS (4) goes to his dads every weekend at 7.30pm

His bedtime at home is 7.30-8.00

I therefore have been sending him ready for bed in pjs when his dad collects him. It's a 20 min walk.

Receieved a text stating "it's unacceptable, it's not the 80's, I'm fuming when people sneer at him" etc along with a long list of instructions as to suitable attire and a demand I pay cab fare if he's already in his pjs

AIBU to have thought I was doing a favour having him ready for bed?!

OP posts:
BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 31/08/2017 21:31

I'm bemused that he thinks wearing pjs was ok in the 80s but it isn't now?

MrsASoprano · 31/08/2017 21:31

He obviosuly doesn't think it's a favour so don't do it, I guess?

dertyyuoih2 · 31/08/2017 21:32

I probably wouldn't, car journey yes... but not walking.

Original poster
pjdrama · 31/08/2017 21:33

Well I can stop. Clearly it's not a favour...

Just missing why he's so irate about it? Surely a child past bedtime in pjs with a backpack that's clearly overnight things isn't that unreasonable a sight to behold?!

OP posts:
PicardsCombOver · 31/08/2017 21:34

He's a 4 year old little boy walking to his dads to go to bed. Either he accepts the pyjamas, picks him up earlier or the next day.

softshells · 31/08/2017 21:34

I wouldn't walk in my pyjamas tbh.

Why does he go so late?

PissPotPourri · 31/08/2017 21:36

Sorry, I don't think there's any need to get him into his Pjs. It takes 2 minutes to get changed for bed. Why have him walk 20 minutes in them...would you do it in the winter?

Original poster
pjdrama · 31/08/2017 21:36

Dad works. It's when he gets here from work to collect. Easier to have him there...

OP posts:
SteelyTesticlesOfObjectivity · 31/08/2017 21:38

I wouldn't, as twenty minutes walking gives time for it to get grubby for bed. However no one is sneering at a four year old in pjs.Hmm

And you are doing hima favour but just don't waste your time.

Original poster
pjdrama · 31/08/2017 21:39

I thought since it was late and obviously he's tired etc... that doing the whole bedtime routine here was allowing his dad off some stuff and made it so they could just chat on way home then into bed... so DS knows it's bedtime really and doesn't expect to stay up for ages once there.

Winter = well I did... but was a warm onesie and a warm coat, boots etc too

OP posts:
SteelyTesticlesOfObjectivity · 31/08/2017 21:39

Put him in his favourite outfit, the one he whines when you take it off.

No dad I wanna be Spider-Man!!!

RainbowPastel · 31/08/2017 21:39

Pajamas are for home not walking around in.

rainbowpie · 31/08/2017 21:39

I wouldn't want my DC walking about in pjs either tbh.

Fudgit · 31/08/2017 21:41

Who would be sneering at a 4 year old?
Apart from that though I think it's a bit far to walk in pyjamas. Maybe a 5 minute walk but not 20.

Xmasbaby11 · 31/08/2017 21:42

I wouldn't send him in pyjamas personally. For me it's part of the ritual of getting ready for bed and it only takes a few mins. I'd never go outside in my nightwear and wouldn't expect dc to either unless they were bring bundled into the car to sleep for the journey.

BackforGood · 31/08/2017 21:43

YABU.
PJs are for inside, in your own home, not walking outside.

HeddaGarbled · 31/08/2017 21:43

I understand your thinking but I'm afraid I'm with your ex on this. If I saw anyone, child or adult, walking the streets in pyjamas, I might not sneer outwardly but inside I'd be thinking it was inappropriate.

Your ex has reacted like the confrontational git he obviously is. All he needed to do was ask nicely. All you need to do is put the pyjamas in the backpack and send your son off in whatever clothes he was already wearing - no special ex approved items, no taxis, that's just silly.

joolspoon · 31/08/2017 21:44

I would think they'd get dirty on a 20 min walk maybe. I don't think anyone would sneer though

DrMadelineMaxwell · 31/08/2017 21:44

At 4 I don't think it's a problem. But I wouldn't do it. They aren't as warm as most clothing and it will start to get cool soon. They aren't as strong as most trouser material, so don't offer the same protection if your DS fell over and skinned his knees. And they could get mucky if he fell and then he'd have nothing to sleep in that was clean.

Ttbb · 31/08/2017 21:46

Maintaining bedtimes is important. If he doesn't want him in PJs he should pick him up at a reasonable time.

Original poster
pjdrama · 31/08/2017 21:47

I thought at 4 it was fine really to wear anything Confused

To be honest although it's summer... he still has a cardi/light jacket over the top by that time and he has his shoes on

I'd better stop popping to the local shop with him in pjs too Blush

OP posts:
Ameliablue · 31/08/2017 21:47

I agree with the dad. I wouldn't want my child walking about at night in pyjamas. Far better to get changed into fresh warm pyjamas when he gets there.

Dawnedlightly · 31/08/2017 21:48

Aww pj you were doing a thoughtful thing, but XH is reasonable to object. Flowers

seven201 · 31/08/2017 21:49

His message was incredibly rude! He should have just asked nicely.

MollysMummy2010 · 31/08/2017 21:51

I put DD in a onesie after swimming in the winter but it is five minutes in the car......don't think I would do a twenty minute walk although your intention is kind.

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