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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To put my four elderly cats to sleep even though they are not dying?

427 replies

Turningtiger · 30/08/2017 16:11

DH lost his job and we've had to move to a cheaper area of the city we live in. The house we have found to accommodate our family and within our price range does not allow pets. We will also probably have to move abroad next year because most of the jobs that DH can get are in Europe.

We have gone through periods of boarding our cats while we have been looking for somewhere new to live and all the turmoil it has brought about. It has been expensive boarding as each cat has a different health condition which needs a lot of attention, giving meds, vet visits etc, so we've had to pay extra for the very kind lady at the boarding to do that too.

I have volunteered for animal rescues in our area for 20 years, and I know what pressure they are under. I know that most people abandon their animals without a second look, and if they do make a donation to the shelter before they disappear, it's usually just enough to cover the initial vaccinations and perhaps a spay. I've also had these cats so long that I don't feel I could trust someone else to look after them in a way that they wouldn't suffer. I know that doesn't sound rational, but I've just had them for so long, I know them so well.

There is also an element for me of feeling terribly embarrassed, after all these years of volunteering and donating, to present the same story as everyone else who we have rolled our eyes at over the years. In the "rescue" world I volunteer in, there is no excuse to abandon your animals.

I am temped now to put them down, so that I can know that they had a fantastic life and that they did not suffer. It will save me a lot of anxiety (yes I'm aware I am thinking about me). I know also that this doesn't sound rational either. But to me it feels like the right thing.

What do you think? The cats are all 16 from the same litter.

OP posts:
WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 30/08/2017 18:02

Put ads on social media asking someone to take them

Problem with doing that is that it's too easy for cats (and small furries like rabbits) to get into the wrong hands and used as dog bait. Really awful. Much better to go through a rescue who do home checks before allowing people to adopt.

OP, have you tried offering your LL a really big deposit to cover any damage s/he thinks the cats will do? That can work with some LLs who initially say no to pets.

Ivymaud · 30/08/2017 18:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Greyhorses · 30/08/2017 18:04

I would PTS a 16 year old cat rather than have it lingering in a rescue centre for god knows how long. Realistically chances of rehoming for cats that old with health issues is very slim, add to that the stress of moving and potentially separating them from everything they know.

Vets don't have to euthanise any animal, but must refer you to a vet who will. They cannot just refuse outright.

nina2b · 30/08/2017 18:04

*Today 17:45 JacquesHammer

*I am refusing to read this horrible thread.

Fgs, how difficult would it be to take your poor cats to a shelter? I SINCERELY hope you get short shrift from any vet you have the nerve to approach.

I despise your attitude to the animals' lives*

So you've not read it but enough to comment?

I have read the TITLE which says it all. Animals should not be killed when they become an inconvenience for whatever reason. Clearer?

mydogisthebest · 30/08/2017 18:05

I've asked what the health problems are and also where OP is. It is quite likely someone on here could help, I certainly will if I can

nina2b · 30/08/2017 18:05

Today 17:45 JacquesHammer

*I am refusing to read this horrible thread

Fgs, how difficult would it be to take your poor cats to a shelter? I SINCERELY hope you get short shrift from any vet you have the nerve to approach.

I despise your attitude to the animals' lives*

So you've not read it but enough to comment?

I have read the TITLE which says it all. Animals should not be killed when they become an inconvenience for whatever reason. Clearer?

Dustbunny1900 · 30/08/2017 18:06

Maybe this is a good lesson to not be so damn judgemental in the future then. It has a way of biting you in the ass.
If there's a good shelter that will take them, swallow your pride.

JacquesHammer · 30/08/2017 18:07

Animals should not be killed when they become an inconvenience for whatever reason. Clearer?

And the OP makes it clear it's not that they're an inconvenience but hey. You've read the title and know it all.

UnicornSparkles1 · 30/08/2017 18:07

JacquesHammer

No, ridiculous is advocating putting perfectly healthy animals to sleep because they've become an inconvenience. Even more ridiculous is that this person volunteers at an animal rescue.

It's fucking shameful.

nina2b · 30/08/2017 18:11

I hope this is a wind up or I really really despair.

JacquesHammer · 30/08/2017 18:12

My dearest friend ended up euthanising her elderly cat as a by product of escaping an abusive and violent marriage.

Atenco · 30/08/2017 18:12

I totally agree with you, OP. Elderly cats to do not rehouse happily. You have given them 16 good years. I have two cats of that age and if I had to move and couldn't take them with me I would have them put down.

nina2b · 30/08/2017 18:14

Some people do not deserve to have pets.

pi1ates · 30/08/2017 18:14

Cats are singular animals, not pack animals. They are often happier being the only cat in the house with human company, rather than being in the company of other cats. OP I think you are possibly projecting "human" qualities onto the cats that don't exist - i.e. you are really not the only person who can care for them; they will probably not "miss" you in the way you conceive of it and they will not miss each other. It will be a change yes, but no more if it's to a good home. Each elderly cat may actually prefer being 1:1 with a new owner/s in a loving home. They love the individual attention.

JacquesHammer · 30/08/2017 18:15

Some people do not deserve to have pets

Yes absolutely. The type of people person who gives an animal a dignified and calm and loving end isn't one of them.

JemmyBloocher · 30/08/2017 18:16

This is pretty disgusting. Truly. Selfish. You appal me.

pi1ates · 30/08/2017 18:19

Are you in London OP?

Ivymaud · 30/08/2017 18:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

littlepeas · 30/08/2017 18:21

This thread is infuriating! So many people seeing the situation in purely black and white terms and coming across as pretty hysterical. YANBU OP.

mydogisthebest · 30/08/2017 18:22

Will posters stop saying elderly cats can't be rehomed, no one wants them, they won't settle, will be unhappy etc.

People do take on elderly cats even ones with ill health. I took on two 16 year old cats who had lived with their owner all their lives. They settled quite happily with me. I was actually quite surprised how quickly they settled.

SupremeCommanderTrinityRhino · 30/08/2017 18:23

I totally hear what you are saying and I would be considering it too.

Big hugs and try and ignore the sanctimonious posts

Charolais · 30/08/2017 18:23

I would never kill my friends and companions because they become inconvenient.

I had a house fire when I was a divorced mother. I kept my family of a dog, two cats, a horse and a little boy together, in the middle of winter here in the northern U.S and I had no relatives within 5,000 miles and had NO help.

We had a rough 3.5 months until our house was re-built, but I did it. Sure, we were all traumatized, but we stayed together and made it through.

Move to a place where you can keep them alive.

lovemylover · 30/08/2017 18:24

Yes.always one that has to bring eating meat into it,for gods sake Angry

SteelyTesticlesOfObjectivity · 30/08/2017 18:26

Sorry but it is weird to happily eat an animal but then rage over the op putting down four cats who've had a good life.

PopcornBits · 30/08/2017 18:26

So because the shelters won't stroke them as much as you like putting them down sounds like the better option.

What is wrong with you?!

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