To put my four elderly cats to sleep even though they are not dying?

[Turningtiger]

DH lost his job and we've had to move to a cheaper area of the city we live in. The house we have found to accommodate our family and within our price range does not allow pets. We will also probably have to move abroad next year because most of the jobs that DH can get are in Europe.

We have gone through periods of boarding our cats while we have been looking for somewhere new to live and all the turmoil it has brought about. It has been expensive boarding as each cat has a different health condition which needs a lot of attention, giving meds, vet visits etc, so we've had to pay extra for the very kind lady at the boarding to do that too.

I have volunteered for animal rescues in our area for 20 years, and I know what pressure they are under. I know that most people abandon their animals without a second look, and if they do make a donation to the shelter before they disappear, it's usually just enough to cover the initial vaccinations and perhaps a spay. I've also had these cats so long that I don't feel I could trust someone else to look after them in a way that they wouldn't suffer. I know that doesn't sound rational, but I've just had them for so long, I know them so well.

There is also an element for me of feeling terribly embarrassed, after all these years of volunteering and donating, to present the same story as everyone else who we have rolled our eyes at over the years. In the "rescue" world I volunteer in, there is no excuse to abandon your animals.

I am temped now to put them down, so that I can know that they had a fantastic life and that they did not suffer. It will save me a lot of anxiety (yes I'm aware I am thinking about me). I know also that this doesn't sound rational either. But to me it feels like the right thing.

What do you think? The cats are all 16 from the same litter.

"Landlord won't take pets" is unacceptable. Find one that does, it's not bloody difficult. Her attitude is fucking appalling. What kind of fucking monster does something like this?

I love this post.

Kinda alternate reality

Ivymaud, you're all over this thread. One that you say you've seen all before, shouldn't be on AIBU (not your call) and trying to cast doubt as to whether the OP's story is genuine?

Report it if you feel that way. There's so much crap posted on mumsnet, no need to post on a thread you disbelieve but assuming the OP is genuine, why make her feel worse?

I'm not the thread police, better to let your nasty little jibes stand. If you've reported it then MNHQ will deal with it presumably.

The thread title was clear. Only the very stupid would open it if it was gong to upset them, let alone post on it. That's clear too.

Balsmicbarbera- I have just reported that disgusting post.

My point was merely that it's false that society treats pets poorly compared to children. It's quite often the opposite as people go soft for random animals but not for other people's kids as I've now clearly seen.

Barbara, that is a completely false and very strange thing to say.

You have gave your cats a happy life.
Putting them down is your choice. (I could never) but like I have said it is your choice.
Have you tried gumtree , fb a message in the local shop or vets . That might get them rehomed.

@Primrose06, That would be a risky thing to do with elderly cats. They could end up being terribly mistreated, and you'll never know what's happening to them. I rehomed a cat through gumtree, and someone did take her on, but she didn't stay in touch, which we asked her to. It broke my DD1's heart as the lady had said we could pay the cat a visit but she never replied to my messages on her mobile. (The cat couldn't cope with 2 lively little girls.)

My cat was only 5 so she's probably ok. But with elderly cats, you're abandoning them to a potentially unknown future.

I'm not saying the OP shouldn't do that, but it's risky. I'd want to rehome through a rescue with elderly cats as at least they vet the new owner's home.

Please don't use gumtree for animals unless you are selling them for enough to put unscrupulous people off. It's an excellent way to obtain animals to harm, particularly bait for training fighting dogs, and ops cats would definitely fall into that category.

I'd probably choose to put them to sleep. As far as I have seen on mumsnet decent houses don't come up often and it can be hard to find somewhere suitable for work and schools for the family. I don't think it's as easy as throwing more money at it or looking for another place.

I get what you mean op about not knowing how they are being treated etc especially as you have had them for so many years. I wouldn't feel comfortable not knowing if my cats were being looked after ok or if they were still together. Younger, yes because they will grow with their new family, as old as they are they probably wouldn't fully settle and only you know if they would or not as all cats are different and have their own ways. My two certainly have differences that we notice and they are siblings.

Try and ask the vets for advice or the shelters, don't feel embarrassed and get as much information as you can and go from there. People are going to differ in their views but in my opion, I would consider the same if I couldn't find anywhere suitable and had no choice but to accept the house offered.

"And that's rather unkind, calling posters stupid"

Is it? People who think that spending their last years in a cage in a rescue centre or being put on Gumtree (ffs) is better than being PTS for elderly cats with health problems are the stupid ones.

If you put an animal up for sale on Gumtree you are being reckless.

Just repeating it because I am a bit worried that people don't understand the risks.

That's because if I'm being generous some people have no grasp of reality and think rl is 101 Dalmatians and some nice people will just rock up and adopt hordes of unwanted animals and care for them lovingly.

However plenty do know what reality is, and couldn't give a fuck what happens to the animal, as long as they don't have to acknowledge it and they can go around bleating about what an animal lover they are.

I vote Put the cats to sleep

Just to the clarify for the hard of reading, I said that it's stupid of posters who will find this thread upsetting to click on it when the title is perfectly clear. Their choice to do so but not then to rail about how upsetting the thread is.

The posters saying that OP should be sending her cats to a rescue place or putting them on Gumtree and the like have no idea what fate waits in store for them. It might be pleasant if a good home is found for them but in likelihood, the odds are not good for elderly cats with health problems. What posters who would do this ARE doing though, is abdicating any responsibility for their beloved pets, making them somebody else's 'problem'.

I would not do this ever. I would want my pet to have a peaceful and definite ending. I absolutely agree with Lurked and Quack on this.

The name-calling of the OP is disgusting and shows real lack of decency - and intelligence.

Actually I think most do know what's in store lying but would rather the animal suffered than do the decent thing themselves.

Years ago my friend bought an ancient pony for £1 that was going to an unscrupulous dealer because it's costly upkeep was impacting the competition budget for the other. Friend knew she couldn't afford to keep it, and either way it was too old to adjust and was on limited time anyway. So she bought it purely to buy it a dignified end, after loads of other people had failed to convince the owner to do the right thing. And as she didn't know the owners they didn't suspect her motives. When the owner found out and went batshit, the vile cunt admitted she knew it would likely have had a horrific fate via the dealer, but at least her pfb late teen could still have been happy thinking it was in a lovely home. And I think a lot of other people are just as aware of reality but when it comes to it really don't give one.

Goddess preserve me from "animal lovers"

Lurkedforever1 What a kind friend! Death is certainly not the worst thing that can happen to an animal.

Yes, and she wasn't the only one willing to, at least one other person offered to foot the bill for the owner to do it at home and another group raised the funds between them with the same intention to buy it. But as they'd all been trying to appeal to the owners sense of decency before that she got wise to them. Luckily friend had a couple of cast offs already so was convincing enough to pull it off.

She's not the only one out there thankfully.