To be frustrated by the misunderstanding of the honorific 'Ms' ?

[ChinkChink]

Inspired by another thread.

I've come across many people who believe that 'Ms' is the honorific for a divorced woman, rather than the female equivalent of 'Mr'. People including several employers, managers, supervisors etc, plus friends and family who I'd normally regard as clued up. And many of them women.

I do welcome the introduction of the term 'Mx' as a title to be used when gender is irrelevant [almost always!] but I fear that Mx will go the same way - people will interpret it as a title for someone who is [for example] transgender.

What say you, MN massive?

That seems.....extreme. What about your title is so important to you?

RallyRound - why?!?!

www.nytimes.com/2009/10/25/magazine/25FOB-onlanguage-t.html?mcubz=0

Origins of Ms. Sheila Michaels uncovered it (rather than invented it, as I stated). Seems safest to assume Ms if you don't know someone's marital status.

Can't fathom why you would be offended at someone calling you Ms.

Next Rally, you're going to tell us that you are 'proud' to be a Mrs. That's always good for a laugh🤣

Who knew so many women had a fear of being mistaken for a lesbian!

Yes and whilst women hold these ridiculous views equality will evade us.
I really hate to say this but women really are their own worst enemy.
We simply need , as others have said one title, as men have. No need to differentiate married/divorced/separated/size 10/12 etc ....it should be of no significance.

As regards men not having the choice, I strongly suspect that if they thought they were missing out on something they would have invented a male version of Miss/Mrs for themselves. I can't speak for all men but I've never heard one express a wish for that to happen.

Men not having the choice...PMSL

I did a secretarial course where we have to learn stuff like that. This was mid 1990s and Ms was still considered the correct term for a divorcee, otherwise Miss. A married lady who kept her maiden name was occasionally referred to as Ms as well, but more usually stayed as Miss. I think there was an equality revolution that tried to use Ms to be non specific as to marital status but it was shouted down by the ladies who wanted to be Mrs or Miss. Whilst I don't mind people using it for this, I don't want people to use it with me. It's worth noting that 100 years ago, an unmarried lady of a certain age would probably be called Mrs out of respect so the title isn't traditionally to do purely with marital status anyway.

i'm wondering the same as you Schaden.

if Mz is pronounced Miz, is Mx pronounced Mix?????? 🤔

I hate being called Mrs bc it always precedes bad news,

"Mrs. Egg, your child flushed a shoe down the toilet at school."
"Mrs. Egg, your dh was in a car accident or forgot to pay a utility."
Even worse is "ma'am" that just means I am old.

I'm Ms because I'm married but kept my own name. I've been Ms x all my life and see no reason to change. i don't care if people who don't know me think I'm divorced.

That's funny because in America the Ms. Is preferred and due to professional etiquette (ie. Political correctness) no one had better comment or make inferences to your marital status. Married woman, young women, women that never married use Ms, and no one says a peep.

Women can choose their preferred title, men don't have the choice

Yes they do. Men can call themselves Miss, Mrs or Ms if they want to, it's perfectly legal.

I'd rather boil my own head than be called Ms quite frankly.

Go for it.

*Who knew so many women had a fear of being mistaken for a lesbian!•
It was more the suggestion that you were man hating (they were often slung together as the ultimate insult in pre enlightened times - in much the same way as boys were called 'gay' for being sensitive!). I say 'pre enlightened' times - because over my working life, things have improved enormously, even if there is some way to go yet

I don't use a title unless I'm absolutely forced. Firstname surname has done me absolutely fine for 43 years. If pushed, I use my Dr - at work only. I find otherwise people want to give me their medical woes. A PhD in Comparative Literature isn't necessarily going to help your piles....

You probably don't want to hear that I'm not appalled to be occasionally addressed as Mrs [husband's forename] [husband's surname].

Totally agree, Holla. I don't even get worked up about surnames- I work in my original surname (my father's....) but am also known by my married name. I get to first name terms as quickly as I can.

Me too Shemozzle !

I'd rather boil my own head than be called Ms quite frankly. I have a very large saucepan I'm more than willing to lend you, if required.

You probably don't want to hear that I'm not appalled to be occasionally addressed as Mrs [husband's forename] [husband's surname] Teachest, I don't think that anyone is outraged if you want to be called by your husband's name. If you want to be Mrs Dave/Fred/Burt TeaChest, then fine. Good for you. What is just awful is some posters making assumptions about why other women would want to be known as Ms rather than Mrs or Miss. That they must be divorced/unmarried and 'insecure' about it/lesbian or a militant feminist. I don't make assumptions that all people with these views are either uneducated, a bit stupid or that they're trying to be 'cool' by deriding feminism I totally do!

I'm a married Ms and I didn't take my DH's surname as I have a perfectly good surname of my own. I don't like the connotation that you're a Miss until you manage to land yourself a husband, then you get to graduate to Mrs, so everyone is aware of your 'achievement'. I believe titles are necessary, particularly in a formal setting. I just don't believe that my title should be dependent on my marital status.

Ummmm.... what's your point again?

As I have got older I realise we are asked information by people and on forms which are nobodies busy. Dob. Miss, Mrs etc. Ethnicity. Most people just don't need to know. It's irrelevant. It just plays to people's prejudice before they have even met you in most case. Especially when job hunting. Or signing up for a website.

I worked very hard to qualify to be a "Mrs." and shall never relinquish that title!

Did you drag him to Vegas and get him blind drunk?

GreatAuntMary "Ms is short for 'Mistress', just as is 'Mrs' and even 'Miss'"

Fine. If it's short for mistress then let's pronounce it "mistress", but Ms is very much not a proper word. Unless we should start saying "mrr" for Mr etc. which would be silly.

I sympathise with the issue. I wish I could drop my "Mr" and just be known as, say, "Rob Simmons", but forms on the internet insist on you having something there. (The same applies to the more unusual situation of having only one name.) I asked about it once and they explained that it has to match the name that my bank has for me. I haven't tried opening an account without a title, but I can imagine that their hands are tied by their computer software, like most other enterprises.

And there's the problem. If you can't even make your minds up yourselves what it's short for and how to pronounce it, how do you expect the rest of us to adopt it with glee?

Yes. There are definitely no other words that are pronounced differently by people with different accents. Gosh, what a killer point you have made.