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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that if you haven't booked a seat on a busy train

285 replies

MrsSchadenfreude · 26/08/2017 10:29

You don't stand huffing loudly about young people having no manners and children should be sitting on their parents' laps, and leaning heavily on people who have reserved seats? Train to Cornwall, Bank Holiday weekend, was never going to be empty.

OP posts:
Luckymummy22 · 26/08/2017 13:36

Saveforthat I agree with children giving up a seat for an adult on a short journey. Well older children. And younger children I would have on a lap.
However if it's a long journey then I think it's unreasonable for them to stand the whole way.
For instance I would give my child the last seat and stand.
Also the safety aspect. I wouldn't want them following over.
10 + years maybe.
But in this instance op is talking of around 6 or 8.
I think that is too young to stand on that journey.
But too old to sit on a lap either.

Luckymummy22 · 26/08/2017 13:37

*falling over

HeteronormativeHaybales · 26/08/2017 13:38

What IncyWincy said. Where I am children travel free until age 15 if travelling with a parent/grandparent, we always reserve seats (which incurs an extra charge), and NFW would I (or would anyone else expect me to) make my child give up their reserved seat to some snotty, superior adult just because 'they haven't paid' Hmm.

JacquesHammer · 26/08/2017 13:41

I'm not sure if this is a national thing but when DD was of an age to travel for free, with a number of train companies around here you could pay for a £5 ticket and reserve a seat for a "free" child.

So for anyone huffing and assuming a child was free would have been wrong in my case

VelvetSpoon · 26/08/2017 13:43

If the children have reserved seats that's fine.

I am a bit Hmm at parents I've seen who have a small child (under 3), no seat reservation for child just one for themselves, but insist on having a pair of seats.

Though even that isn't as bad as the entitled parents we encountered on a recent trip who asked us to move as they needed 'space' for their baby. Said baby was about 3 weeks old and cried the whole time because they had laid it on the seats (the 2 seats we'd vacated) and were expecting it to sleep.

Nuttynoo · 26/08/2017 13:50

You can't book seats with a season ticket. Virgin Trains ameliorates this slightly by giving compensation and on the odd occasion removing people unreserved seats if the passenger is really struggling.

GoldilocksAndTheThreePears · 26/08/2017 13:50

That train was the bane of my existence for many years Grin From the south of Cornwall, living and working in SW London for years so used that service twice a year. Pure hell. I've had a man refusing to get up from my reserved seat so I had to stand next to him the entire way as the train was too crowded to seek help. People sitting up the entire aisle so hours without being able to go loo! Someone attempting to steal my suitcase as they got off at Plymouth. And of course the best one, when the journey is suddenly chopped and the entire 8 or 10 coach train has to get off and try and squeeze into a 3-4 coach train at Plymouth, with everyone else waiting for the next one.

I saw a couple 'not understanding' someone telling them they were in someone's seats then speaking to each other in English later.... Christmas Eve is the most fun, people sitting in the loo as there wasn't enough room in the vestibule to even stand. I've had it where I've had to lean over someone else's luggage as I had just enough room to stand my feet but not enough to be upright. Fun times.

If you've taken the time to reserve a seat you should be able to sit in it, regardless of age or the station you got on at. As I got progressively more ill- the reason I no longer have to do this journey is because I relocated permanently due to my disability- I made sure to book the aisle seat closest to the door but still had issues, clearly ill and struggling to stand I had to repeatedly ask whoever was in my seat to move.

HeteronormativeHaybales · 26/08/2017 13:50

Oh, if I hadn't reserved a seat (which I always do on long-distance trips) I'd obviously have my small dc on my lap. I also use regional trains a lot, where you can't reserve, and if there's a seat shortage I will sometimes squash onto a pair of seats with my two oldest and have the little one on my lap. It's the idea that a child should have to vacate a reserved seat because children don't pay/shouldn't be allowed a seat on a bus because they only pay half fare (have heard that one on MN threads about buses many a time) that I object to. I think there has been a bit of a renaissance on here of the idea that adults are more important than children and must be deferred to in all situations. I can see it's backlash from what some people feel is excessive indulgence of children, but like all backlashes, it's deeply conservative and authoritarian and makes me uncomfortable.

Nuttynoo · 26/08/2017 13:53

@HeteronormativeHaybales - I think the issue here is that ALL seat reserved tickets should cost the same be they child or adult as happens in India. A seat's a seat. By charging less for kids there is an implication that they would need to be moved for adult passengers.

expatinscotland · 26/08/2017 13:58

'By charging less for kids there is an implication that they would need to be moved for adult passengers.'

Well, by that token, people over 60 often get charged less, too, regardless of their health, is the implication still the same? You don't have any idea what people have paid in all fact, they may have been last minute, got the ticket for free off a friend, bought it cheap on Ebay, bought in advance, etc.

WyfOfBathe · 26/08/2017 14:02

YANBU. I reserved table seats on the train for a trip to the beach. There was a family already in our seats, and I asked them to move. The mother argued that they should be able to keep the seats because they had kids and needed to stay together. They were two parents with two older kids (around 8 and 10) while I was on my own with two five year olds and a baby. Eventually they did get up. The adults stood next to us complaining while the kids ran up and down the carriage for the whole journey.

LaurieFairyCake · 26/08/2017 14:04

There are loads of people saying they tell people to move from their reserved seat and they refuse - what are you supposed to do in that scenario Confused

The conductor often won't do anything.

You could sit on their lap - but I suspect some fuckers would like that Hmm

SapphireStrange · 26/08/2017 14:12

Wyf, they sound like proper tits. What did they think your five year olds and a baby were; chopped liver?!

SylviaPoe · 26/08/2017 14:13

People who sit in reserved seats that aren't theirs should be fined, just as people are who get on the wrong train for their ticket type.

HarrietVane99 · 26/08/2017 14:13

If all the seats apart from Coach F are reserved on the busiest weeks of the year they should put more coaches on.

But as a pp said, that isn't always possible. Station platforms can't always accommodate longer trains. Round here, a lot of work has been done extending platforms to accommodate twelve coach trains. But not all platforms can be extended, if there's some feature such as a tunnel or a bridge in the way.

It's not always as simple as running more trains, either. Many London termini and regional junctions operate at or near capacity. And if major work is undertaken to expand capacity, as currently at London Bridge, people complain about that, too.

AlexanderHamilton · 26/08/2017 14:38

Being able to reserve seats is one reason why I now pay the extra & travel on Virgin rather than London Midland. It would be fine if it was just me, but my children aged 13 & 15, both outwardly normal looking but with a hidden condition, would find a long journey hard.

In fact I'm just debating what to do about a trip to Wembley as we won't know how long it will take to get from there to Euston at the end of the match so will have to Book flexible tickets & ds will have used all his energy coping with the match.

Cupoteap · 26/08/2017 14:51

Not booked seats on a train to Cornwall - busy always even when it's not school holidays!

expatinscotland · 26/08/2017 14:56

'It would be fine if it was just me, but my children aged 13 & 15, both outwardly normal looking but with a hidden condition, would find a long journey hard. '

Yet plenty expect them to stand up for any adult going.

grannytomine · 26/08/2017 14:57

To be fair the children haven't paid full fare so I can see an argument that adults, particularly if they have paid the full fare as a walk on fare, being able to sit. If the family have a friends and family card the children's seats haven't cost much at all. I don't know how you can make it fair really, discounts for families, over 60s, the disabled, young people so adults of say 25 to 60 without children must be subsidising everyone else. I say that as someone who had a friends and family card for many years, I had children under 16 for 36 years and when the youngest was too old for that I was able to buy an over 60s card so I have benefitted from much cheaper fares than adults with no children. I would have sat a six year old on my lap even if his seat was reserved and have done when my children were that age, if you can't manage to sit on the floor then standing for 4 hrs is really miserable.

The last time I was on a very crowded train from London to Cornwall a family with 4 children commandeered 8 seats round 2 tables and refused to move their bags to allow people to sit so it definitely isn't always the older people. I'm afraid if I hadn't had a seat their bags would have been moved.

JacquesHammer · 26/08/2017 15:00

People who sit in reserved seats that aren't theirs should be fined

I have no problem people sitting in them as lonf as they're prepared to move if and when it's necessary

grannytomine · 26/08/2017 15:04

I have no problem people sitting in them as lonf as they're prepared to move if and when it's necessary I agree, people don't always turn up or end up sitting somewhere else so it isn't unreasonable.

Ttbb · 26/08/2017 15:04

Anyone who travels on bank holiday without booking a seat is an idiot.

grannytomine · 26/08/2017 15:08

Anyone who travels on bank holiday without booking a seat is an idiot. Well it could be an emergency, they got a call this morning to say their mother way dying or something and they dashed to the station and bought a ticket,too late to reserve a seat. Things sometimes happen that we can't control.

Serenity05 · 26/08/2017 15:16

DH and I were on a packed train from Coventry to Manchester a couple of years ago. We'd booked seats but found a middle-aged couple sitting in them. We politely asked them to move and showed them our seat reservations but they refused because they'd had those seats since Bournemouth and there was nowhere else for them to sit. Yeah, no shit Sherlock, that's why we booked seats!

I was about 24 weeks pregnant at the time and my bump was hidden by my big coat. I undid the coat and pushed it aside and pointedly told them I wasn't going to stand all the way back to Manchester. They got twin, "Oh shit" looks on their faces when they clocked the bump and then decided the man would move so I could sit next to his wife while he and DH stood up.

Luckily the train cleared out a bit at Birmingham so they were able to move into unreserved seats, huffing and puffing and grumbling all the way. Cheeky fuckers.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 26/08/2017 15:25

I'm not sure there's enough rolling stock in the entire country to enable everyone on that train to have a seat this weekend. You could easily double the length of the train and still have people having yo stand.