to wonder if anyone really cares?

[QueenNefertitty]

The wearing of sunglasses.
Takeaway coffee.
Parenting your children in an enthusiastic manner.

Have all recently been decried (by a significant number of posters) on MN as actions undertaken PURELY to 'impress' other people, or to look cool...

Do people REALLY think that sunglasses/coffee/enthusiastic parenting are done for attention... ? Or is it just a bit of summer holiday/silly season boredom kicking in, and people fancy a scrap?

Can't work out if people are on the wind up, or genuine.

I'm 'guilty' of all three - am I to be cast out of Mumsnet forthwith?!

Apols for the TAAT X3!

Performance parenting is absolutely done for the attention! Sneaky glances to check people are looking..... overly loud and in sight of as many people as possible

Yes, yes I believe it's all an act, and a cringey one at that!

Can't work out if people are on the wind up, or genuine.

I think they're genuine. Terrible self esteem is common enough.

I don't give a shite/notice anything about other people unless I'm directly engaging with them.

I take apathy to a whole new level.

I am quite heavily tattooed and am aware that I upset many people by simply existing so anything I do on top of that is no biggie, really.

Missed the sunglasses to impress people or get attention.
I wear them to hide my scowl/ knackered face.

They're genuine moaning buggers. I'm quite deaf and I have really sensitive eyes, so I parent loudly while wearing sunglasses. I must really annoy people

I'm with you op!

And with 'performance parenting', where is the line drawn?? What is and isn't acceptable ??? I now feel a bit self conscious when I play with my baby when we're out and about, in case people think I'm being a dick, when all I'm doing is... well, playing with my baby?! I use an enthusiastic voice and smile lots and throw him in the air and catch him and tickle him- because that's what makes him happy! It's not for anyone else! I would never be noisy about it in an inappropriate place, but It really sucks the fun out of bloody everything when you're made to feel like everything you do is some sort of attention seeking act.

If anything, I think it takes a pretty self centred way of thinking to assume everything everyone else does is for the purpose of impressing you.

bear me too

I honestly don't give a shit what people do.

Even If they want to wear sunglasses at midnight walking around Tesco sipping a latte from Starbucks all while signing little bow peep to there child in a shrilly voice ... then they can go for it, I really don't care... the stuff that annoys people is striking sometimes

Sunglasses are worn for attention? Is this a thing? I wear mine when it's bright, who knew I'd been doing it wrong all these years

Sunglasses are for attention? I have sensitive eyes and NEED them. What am I supposed to do, walk around with my eyes closed?

I don't walk around with takeaway coffee because I can't afford takeaway coffee. If I see someone walking around with takeaway coffee then I just presume that they're on their way somewhere and wanted a coffee but didn't have time to sit in the shop to drink it.

I do wear sunglasses when others may not but that's because I suffer from migraines and the brightness of an average day can trigger an attack. I don't have fancy show off sunglasses, just boots ones.

I am enthusiastic with my dd when out and about because thats how I am when I'm in the house with her too. Obviously I have off/tired days but most of the time I have enough energy to be enthusiastic with her. I am conscious not to be too loud but if we're reading a book then I will do voices, again not loud and I am aware of disturbing others. I do voices when reading because that's how books should be read to kids.

Don't people just wear sunglasses so they can, you know, see without being dazzled by the sunlight? unless wearing them after dark of course in which case yup, twat.
Agree with those who don't really care what others do as long as it's not harming anyone.

I don't notice what others do unless directly engaging with them, either. I drink loads of coffee. I have a Contigo and drink it on the go sometimes. I've drunk it since I was about 13. That was over 30 years ago so I'm way ahead of trends . Oh, and it's not 'American', it's European to drink coffee. Bach even composed music in praise of it and America was still a British colony and drinking tea or ale.

I forgot to add that I really don't care what others do and don't judge people for the issues that have come up in MN lately. On the other hand I'm so self conscious and worry people will be judging me. On occasion I've made myself ill by not wearing sunglasses when out and about an a slightly cloudy day as I worry people will think I'm an idiot

' unless wearing them after dark of course in which case yup, twat. '

Not necessarily. Back in the day, I used to wear them in the dark to cover up stoned eyes .

I think the 'come on sweetheart, you know you can read those big words. We've been practicing your reading every day during the holidays' in a big loud voice at the national trust house from my friend was totally for the benefit of me, and others.
The coffee and sunglasses? I've never considered that someone would be doing those things to impress me!

Wtf? Sunglasses?? That's hilarious! For what it's worth, my sunglasses are my safety net - I'm not looking for attention, I'm hiding behind them! Much less chance of random weirdos trying to make eye contact or - worse - talk to me when I'm wearing them.

I swan around in my sunglasses with my take away coffee. It's the only way to do it really. Swanning. Like. Totally.

"Performance parenting is absolutely done for the attention! Sneaky glances to check people are looking..... overly loud and in sight of as many people as possible"
aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh
not AGAIN.

My DM performance grandparents I die a little inside....

I wear sunglasses because otherwise my eyes leak and I squint, being cool is something I can't help but I do wear designer sunglasses

"What is and isn't acceptable"

Who cares if it's acceptable or not? It only hurts the person judging so harshly as the offending parenter, cup bearer and shades wearer continues in blissful ignorance.

"unless wearing them after dark of course in which case yup, twat."
Or a dealer

Ur meant to be over enthusiastic with dcs its how they understand things better at that aflge.proven fact.making everything big and exciting should be one of the joys of parenting.ur literally showing sc whole new world.war if parents glance over fr fear ur judging...oh wait u r!

I love my 😎. If you don't wear them, how do you not squint all day? How do you drive when it's sunny? How DO you cope when hungover?

Performance parenting is certainly cringeworthy and head girl badge on we shouldn't be drinking coffee from disposable cups because most of them can't be recycled. Drink your damned coffee at home or get a keep cup!

I've never seen performance parenting, but then I never really pay that much attention to other people and their kids.

Takeaway coffee I love. Most of the time it's the only way I can grab a coffee while my DS is in his buggy. I see a sit down coffee as a luxury. No way would my DS (unless he was asleep) sit patiently enough without having a melt down.

Sunglasses I would only be a bit if they were in doors and at night.

I think it's a kind of narcissism to believe that people are drinking coffee, talking to their children or wearing sunglasses AT you.