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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be disappointed with Joss Whedon

127 replies

BlueKarou · 21/08/2017 11:00

Yes, I know it's just sleb twaddle, and it doesn't impact my life one bit...

That said, I really thought he was one of the good guys and it turns out he's an entitled cheat, as well as a gaslighting arsehole. It feels like a betrayal - he was supposed to be this feminist creator, this writer of strong women and equality, and it turns out he's just a regular creep.

Kai Cole's article.

OP posts:
ReadyPlayer1 · 21/08/2017 11:03

YANBU. I am equally disappointed.

PrawnTempura · 21/08/2017 11:07

Wow. Poor woman. Yes, very disappointing.

GeekyWombat · 21/08/2017 11:07

It's the directly quoted justifications / attempts at apology that make it worse I think.

But yeah, YANBU.

BlueKarou · 21/08/2017 11:10

The statement from his people at the end really pissed me off, for some reason - the little passive aggressive barb inferring he's the better person for not saying anything.

OP posts:
belleface · 21/08/2017 11:11

I thought he was a good guy too. Love Buffy

NotMyMonkees · 21/08/2017 11:15

I'm getting more and more cynical as I get older, everything's fake it seems. Being a "nice guy" or a feminist is just the image that some powerful men choose project to increase their power.

MephistophelesApprentice · 21/08/2017 11:16

You either die a hero or live long enough to become a villain.

Utterly unsurprising - most male feminists only espouse the view to get laid.

banivani · 21/08/2017 11:16

I am not surprised at all. His "feminism" in his work is only skin deep in my opinion - a lot of self-congratulatory talk but not really a lot of substance when you look at it. So you're both NU because it is disappointing that someone who claimed to be better turns out to be a serial adulterer and liar like so many other dudes, and you're BU because it wasn't that surprising. ;)

BigDamnHero · 21/08/2017 11:16
Sad

Firefly is my favourite ever TV show. I thought he was a good guy. How very disappointing.

craftsy · 21/08/2017 11:23

Read up on his appalling treatment of Charisma Carpenter when she told him she was pregnant while working on Angel. I loved him before that but his misogyny shone through then so I'm not too surprised now. Avengers didn't even pass the Bechdel test.

ThomasHardyPerennial · 21/08/2017 11:23

Not surprised either. He has been riding on his reputation as a "good guy" for a long time, and he has said a lot of twatty things over the last few years. Doesn't seem to be a very nice person.

MephistophelesApprentice · 21/08/2017 11:27

Oh gods, look at all those creepy 'self aware' confessions.

"Look how sensitive I am, I know EXACTLY how I've hurt you and why! Aren't I great for admitting it?!"

Men like him are almost worse than the ignorant thoughtless cat callers, because he literally does know better, but can't be arsed to be better.

Male feminists are losers.

jay55 · 21/08/2017 11:29

What a tosser.

SorenLorensonsInvisibleFriend · 21/08/2017 11:29

Wow, I had no idea it was that extreme. For a long time, I really considered him a hero mainly due to my love for Buffy.

I felt unsettled in the first episode of Dollhouse, but passed it off as it being a collaborative effort from the writers. The series didn't redeem itself for me. The Black Widow storyline in the last Avengers film reminded me of that bad taste of faint misogyny and unpleasant hint that maybe the Great Feminist might be just an act.

A million quid said he either had an affair with, or attempted to with Faith from Buffy, his writing treatment for her in that and in Dollhouse just made me feel squicky.

So, overall? Disappointed but even more disappointed that I'm not surprised at all.

JesusTapdancingChrist · 21/08/2017 11:31

What. A. COCK.

This is precisely why my skin crawls the second a man describes himself as a feminist .

AnUtterIdiot · 21/08/2017 11:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oysterbabe · 21/08/2017 11:38

Oh no Sad

peachgreen · 21/08/2017 11:42

I'm utterly unsurprised, tbh. Joss Whedon is a self-proclaimed feminist who can only write women as a variation on one of three archetypes: strong asskicker (Buffy, Faith, Zoe), cute nerd (Willow, Kaylee, Fred, Penny) or mysterious ethereal beauty (Inara, River, Dawn). He fired Charisma Carpenter because she got pregnant (and referred to her as "that fat pregnant actress" on set) and was annoyed that she waited until her second trimester to tell anyone - despite the fact that she'd had a miscarriage previously and therefore wanted to wait until she was sure. He repeatedly uses rape as a plot device. He refuses to listen to women when they criticise his feminism (he even quit Twitter because of "militant feminists").

I feel extremely sorry for his ex-wife - it's an awful, awful thing to have happen to you - but I'm not surprised at all. I absolutely believe that men can be feminists / feminist allies but Joss Whedon is not one and never has been, no matter how much he likes to think it of himself. Imagine proclaiming yourself to be a a feminist whilst continually cheating on your wife and viewing your female colleagues as targets. Disgusting.

Therealslimshady1 · 21/08/2017 11:45

I read all this, a bit confused...thought it was about Josh Widdacombe Confused

Could not picture him as a bad one!

Showandtell · 21/08/2017 11:49

so THAT explains the inexplicable focus on Eliza Dushku (crap actress extraordinaire)

SorenLorensonsInvisibleFriend · 21/08/2017 11:53

Just read this and it crystallised all the slight "not sure about this" feelings I had. In a way, it's nice to see our instincts are good, but it is utterly awful for his wife.

I had no idea he was so cruel to Charisma Carpenter! I know he fell out with James Marsters, and was never sure if it was down to the Spike/Buffy rape thing, as Marsters made it clear he found that very difficult.

SorenLorensonsInvisibleFriend · 21/08/2017 11:54

Would've been good if I'd added the link.......

www.themarysue.com/reconsidering-the-feminism-of-joss-whedon/

craftsy · 21/08/2017 11:57

He did just fire Carpenter. He wrote her into numerous situations she was uncomfortable with. Then wrote her out of the next season without telling her she was fired. She found out when a journalist called her for a statement. Then they approached her to come back for the 100th episode after a family bereavement meant Sarah Michelle Gellar pulled out. She really didn't want to after the way she was treated but she eventually agreed stimulating she would only do it if Cordelia did not die. Whedon agreed, she signed a contract and then he sent a lackey to tell her Cordelia dies.

He's a fucking cunt for that alone. He was deliberately abusive because he could be. And he's so much more powerful than her that she has to couch her honesty about his abuse with glowing compliments about his genius.

SisterhoodisPowerful · 21/08/2017 12:04

I didn't know about his treatment of Charisma Carpenter but I'm not surprised. I've only met 2 men who understand and support feminism. Many of the others who claimed to be turned out to be abusive; many with a history of sexualised violence.

AnnMeredithPerkins · 21/08/2017 12:08

I'm not defending him as i dont know enough about him, but based on one article from the ex wife?? i'm not saying its not true, but seriously, who knows what happened in their marriage?

and was annoyed that she waited until her second trimester to tell anyone - despite the fact that she'd had a miscarriage previously and therefore wanted to wait until she was sure. in an industry where continuity and looks and stability are everything, being pregnant is a huge change, i'd be pretty fucked off as well

(i'm only commenting on the first article and from posts above, again i dont know much about JW)