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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Husband and toilet time

118 replies

C0untDucku1a · 20/08/2017 12:39

I dont know if im being totally unreasonable being so irritated by this.

My husband has a minimum of three poos a day. He doesnt have any diagnosed health issues. It annoys me because he spends so much time in a day in there. We only have one toilet. I have in the past suspected he does it for quiet time. we only have one toilet so it impacts us all.

Aibu to be so irriated? Should i be ordering him to see a doctor... or eat less??? Or are three - four poos a day normal?

OP posts:
Hapaxlegomenon · 22/08/2017 03:35

So it would be similarly okay, and nothing to get worked up about of course, if a husband were to control his wife's toileting?

Yes. I get told to hurry up if I've been in the bathroom for ages doing my makeup. I don't count that as abuse and grounds for divorce!

Juanbablo · 22/08/2017 06:15

Dh does this. He takes his phone with him. He gets home from work and disappears for a shite for half an hour.

The other evening he had been gone so long, I was trying to dish up dinner, dc3 was crying and wanting to be picked up and dcs 1 and 2 were fighting. I yelled up the stairs "you cannot still be having poo?! Please come and help me!"

I remember my dad doing it too except he took a newspaper. I can think of more comfortable places to sit and read!

TenForward82 · 22/08/2017 07:28

The point is that they're not pooing. They're using it as an excuse to get away from the family so the wife can do it all. That's controlling and an inconvenience.

saffrongirl · 22/08/2017 07:34

The point is that they're not pooing. They're using it as an excuse to get away from the family so the wife can do it all. That's controlling and an inconvenience.

My dh is definitely pooing, believe me 🙊

drbeverlyhofstadter · 22/08/2017 07:45

Believe it or not reading on the loo can actually help some people who have poo difficulties- the same nervous system reaction that causes your cilliary muscle (inside the eye) to allow your eye to focus on near print also relaxes your sphincter muscle Smilebut it may not be helpful to let dh know this Wink

clippityclock · 22/08/2017 07:46

I'm having a poo now. Nice bit of quiet time before I leave the house 😁

CosmicPineapple · 22/08/2017 07:46

Unless you are wiping your arse with the ipad how is it unhygienic?

People have their toothbrushes/soap/sponges/toiletries in their bathroom take a dump in there and dont't care so how is holding an ipad dirty?

I do not police DPs toilet time. Why would I its not my business. He does ask if anyone needs the bathroom before he goes and if you decline then need to go you wait until hes done.

MissBabbs · 22/08/2017 07:57

I don't think I could eat enough to need to go 3 times a day. Or if I did I'd be a very hefty weight (and I'm not light now).

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 22/08/2017 08:13

Yes. I get told to hurry up if I've been in the bathroom for ages doing my makeup. I don't count that as abuse and grounds for divorce!

That's completely different; pooing is a bodily function, putting make up on is not.

One is necessary, the other is not.

Looneytune253 · 22/08/2017 08:16

I don't understand this. My DH doesn't take half as long and that is a bit annoying lol. Why do people take phones in, that's just distracting. Do what you need to do then get out!! Not to mention all the germs passing onto phones etc. Grim!!

reallyanotherone · 22/08/2017 08:17

Pre kids and iphones i could quite easily sit on the loo for half an hour with a book.

And yes, it was pooing. The relaxation time helped the process and made sure everything was emptied.

Once the family came a long though and i was constantly being called for or needed for something i had to change that habit.

So i don't think it's a "man thing", more a who's allowed the luxury thing.

HashiAsLarry · 22/08/2017 08:21

My dh only stopped doing this when he kept being regularly late for work. Basically I gave up nagging him out of the toilet so everyone else could get ready, and made him wait looking after the dc whilst I got ready last. Amazingly after a week or so of leaving the house half an hour later than he needed to, the morning poo stopped taking so long.

Our toilet door doesn't lock, so if the dc get desperate I tell them to go in and get a potty and join him. Grin

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 22/08/2017 08:21

Not to mention all the germs passing onto phones etc. Grim!!

There is no passing on of germs to phones unless you're an idiot.

ThisIsReallyFunny · 22/08/2017 10:03

There is no passing on of germs to phones unless you're an idiot.

That's not actually true. When you flush, small particles of urine and fecel matter get into the atmosphere landing on things like toothbrushes... and phones.

SnickersWasAHorse · 22/08/2017 10:56

I put the lid down when I flush.

My toothbrush is always in my bathroom but you don't get people carrying on about that being unhygienic.

TheNaze73 · 22/08/2017 11:26

He's probably having an ASWAD

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 22/08/2017 14:15

That's not actually true. When you flush, small particles of urine and fecel matter get into the atmosphere landing on things like toothbrushes... and phones.

Like a pp, I put the lid down when I flush, so no germs.

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