AIBU to think SAHMs shouldn't put this nonsense on a CV/job application

[windygallows]

In the last year I've recruited for numerous part-time jobs, receiving applications from many women who took time out to be with family and are now returning to work.

Many of the applicants have been straightforward and simply noted on their CV that they have been SAHM - simple.

But increasingly applicants, perhaps based on some guidance from career counsellors or MN, are finding more creative ways to describe their absence from the workforce.

One, we'll call her Mrs Jones, wrote that for 10 years she was employed by the 'Jones family' and that her work involved 'organizing international travel for her family.' Because organizing a holiday is similar to the tasks led by senior executives.

Another wrote a list of every task she did at home from getting groceries to cleaning the house which, while impressive as an exhaustive list, doesn't really mean much when applying to an office-based role. Especially as it's basically a list of everything most employees have to fit in outside of work.

More galling are the claims that women make about the critical role they played - with my favourite being the one who 'Spent 7 years looking after my two children who needed and deserved my attention.'

There is huge value in the work that SAHMs do but please, please don't put this kind of waffle on your CV. You never know if your interview panel will consist of a FT working, single mom like me who finds it pretty insulting that working means her children apparently lost out on 'the attention they needed and deserved.' Urgh.

Of course you're being judgemental when reviewing cvs. You're judging people against a criteria for the job. And you may only spend a minute scanning each CV.

Curly, I'm pretty sure OP was aware she wasn't staying home even before she read these idiotic CVs.

As a qualified careers adviser, I would never advise anyone to list all the tasks they carried out as a SAHM on a CV or job application. CV's should be tailored to the position.

It's ridiculous and I can't see how it would get through any sort of robust sifting process.

The thing is, I think there is too much judgment over other people's choices.

A lot of SAHM's 'devoting' themselves to family and children happens because it is the most sensible choice in their own situation.

I was in a situation where my DH's career was much more lucrative than my own, I had been told my DC had additional needs and could only attend school part time with the addition of been practically forced to volunteer at the school in order for my DC to fully participate in the curriculum , even though a Statement of SEN fully funded a 1 to 1 TA. There was no suitable childcare I could afford & family live hundreds of miles away.

So, yes, I dedicated myself into sorting all this lot out. It worked. My DC overcame any difficulties and no longer has a Statement and is achieving above average. But now I have been out of work for over a decade.

This would take some explaining on a CV. Other people tend not to really understand. Firstly because we were successful, not many believe additional needs can be overcome. All I can say is that this is what happened. Secondly because unless people experience something similar themselves they find it difficult to empathise.

If I needed to work again I don't know what I'd do exactly except throw my energy into it.

Bolshy- you just put 'career break with caring responsibilities' or similar. In your case you can add your volunteering as well.

You don't need to go into great lengths to justify your time out- that's the whole point of this thread. The potential employer doesn't need to know the precise circumstances of everyone's back story; every individual will have their own reasons and their own circumstances

I did read the op and what stood out to me is that they are not happy having the fact all these mums who've sent cvs in are sahm put in her face like that.

You can easily ignore a situation until it's pointed out to you which is what these cvs have done to the op 🙄

Well even if that's true curly which I very much doubt, since recruiters without DC have said they also find it ridiculous, why would you do something to alienate the person who you want to give you a job?

Why would you be such an idiot?

It's like going for a job as a butcher and setting out your pro vegan sentiments in your CV.

Did you read the part where she has no issue whatever with women who simply state that they took time out to raise a family?

After a very clear OP and over 800 posts, I don't know how much plainer any of us can make the point. Just trust me, you've missed it. And you are now insulting OP's intelligence.

They're not being very professional then ifs that's the case.

They're being entirely professional. I think you've betrayed a lack of understanding in your reading of the posts tbh

They're being perfectly professional. They will select people for interview who've displayed relevant skills and experience in the CV and application and not done anything to show terrible judgement at the start of the

Process.

(Damn phone!)

I'm reading between the lines. Just because someone says something isn't a problem doesn't make it true.

That is what jumped out at me from the op.
Everyone is allowed an opinion but if someone is different to you lot you don't like it.

I haven't got time to read 34 pages of comments.

As we can't have a constructive conversation about this post I'm going to leave and crack on with my kitchen.

I bid you all a good day 😊

Babbity, the problem being that the 'volunteering' was years ago. It did not really feel voluntary either. I did not carry on once I could show my DC did not need me there. My DC needed to show continuing independence to establish their progression. I also did not carry on because politically I felt used and I didn't want to be complicit in parents being used in this situation. '

Caring responsibilities' is problematic because my DC overcame their additional needs. I do not describe myself as being a career, in an official, as in carer's allowance paid, capacity, simply because I wasn't and people generally do not believe additional needs, such as my DC, was believed to have, can be overcome. Yet they were and the documentation and my DC's achievements shows this. I felt if I claimed to be a carer, in this context it would reflect, badly on my DC and distort their capabilities.

If I was to work again I think I would have to start from scratch. Or just be very fortunate. Or be self employed. None is impossible though and I've also seen what some have thought impossible happen.

The rest of us have hopefully been having a constructive conversation about the post.

Employers don't have time to spend ages reading through the lines of an application. I usually have 100+ applicants and one day to shortlist 20 for further discussion and 6 for interview.

You are not reading between any lines at all. You're simply projecting, insulting OP and failing to grasp a very clear point about not talking shite and insulting the recruiter on your CV.

I don't know whether you're a SAHM, but if you were and I implied it made you somehow lesser....it might not affect how you feel about your choice (I hope it wouldn't) but would it make you inclined to give me a job?

Curly knew what the OP really meant better than the OP herself?! Blimey. Wonder if telepathy is one of the skills she's learned as a SAHM? I'd advise her not to mention it on her cv

Bolshy- when I said 'caring' I meant in the broadest sense of caring for children. its fine to put that on a cv. Your volunteering may also be relevant experience for certain jobs... you don't need to mention that you felt pushed into it, just state the facts if relevant

Curly was a disingenuous idiot who is patently still reading the thread and busting a gut because she can't respond any more.

bolshy, in your case, if you were so dedicated that you were able to overcome your children's additional needs (which is no comment upon people who worked equally hard but were not able to achieve the same for their own children), that is actually something that I think a recruiter would be interested in hearing.

Really, PoorYorick? It feels too personal. It is not simply my story to tell ether, it is my DC's. The achievements were my DC's. I just saw their potential, believed in it and encouraged them. TBH to say too much feels like a betrayal because they have done so well and because I think it is so shocking other people would write them off at such an early age.

Well if you're not comfortable sharing it, then obviously don't. But looking after children with additional needs, to that outcome, is more than the standard life skills of "organising international travel" and "overseeing home repairs". It shows tenacity and determination to get the most out of people. The fact that you then see the achievement as being theirs...well, you sound streets ahead of many managers I know.

Ironic then that sharing it is difficult for me, Yorick. I just don't feel right profiting from any difficulties my DC had though. There is a lot to unravel, emotionally. Perhaps a lot of people's real capabilities are just left unsaid. CVs seem inadequate somehow.

Then you do what feels most comfortable for you. If you do go back to work, you can just put 'caring responsibilities', perhaps 'caring responsibilities for children with additional needs' - that's all you need to say. If the interviewer asks about it, you can either say what you're comfortable with, or what you just said - that you'd rather not talk about it because you don't want to profit from the difficulties your children have had.

(That would probably get you the job from me if I were hiring.)