AIBU to think SAHMs shouldn't put this nonsense on a CV/job application

[windygallows]

In the last year I've recruited for numerous part-time jobs, receiving applications from many women who took time out to be with family and are now returning to work.

Many of the applicants have been straightforward and simply noted on their CV that they have been SAHM - simple.

But increasingly applicants, perhaps based on some guidance from career counsellors or MN, are finding more creative ways to describe their absence from the workforce.

One, we'll call her Mrs Jones, wrote that for 10 years she was employed by the 'Jones family' and that her work involved 'organizing international travel for her family.' Because organizing a holiday is similar to the tasks led by senior executives.

Another wrote a list of every task she did at home from getting groceries to cleaning the house which, while impressive as an exhaustive list, doesn't really mean much when applying to an office-based role. Especially as it's basically a list of everything most employees have to fit in outside of work.

More galling are the claims that women make about the critical role they played - with my favourite being the one who 'Spent 7 years looking after my two children who needed and deserved my attention.'

There is huge value in the work that SAHMs do but please, please don't put this kind of waffle on your CV. You never know if your interview panel will consist of a FT working, single mom like me who finds it pretty insulting that working means her children apparently lost out on 'the attention they needed and deserved.' Urgh.

The type of sector that Supermum is describing is peculiar unto itself, though, we can all see that her approach wouldn't work in the majority of settings. That firm sounds like it has conditioned its employees - management as well as entry level - to think along company lines and attracts / retains the people who fit the mould. That sounds about right for a large corporate!

Judgement is obviously necessary for vast swathes of important but we paid work.

• low paid work!!

I work in large corporate.

The landscape is changing, because they know they are missing out.

It is very hard to generalise on these things. For some jobs they just want to know you don't have a criminal record and can drive and perhaps turn up on time so if you were vetting women at home you could ask the school for a reference to prove they always got their children to school to assess them other in her reliability in terms of delivery of children on time - time keeping being vital and if hard work counts then how much effort has she put into PTA events or making costumes for school plays or whatever.

The bottom line has to be to make your CV or application relevant for that job so if you've been a lawyer at home for 2 years then show what you did in law in that period eg wrote some legal articles, learned all about a new area no one yet knows about (UK expert on Brexit and regulations relating to paint say or whatever). If you want a job in a local shop they may not be too bothered about gaps on the CV. They may not even check it out.

Booking a holiday is not a skill that is really worth much. My 18 year old son has just booked a post A level holiday and I doubt that is giong to go on his CV. He also cooks all his own meals and buys the stuff for them. Can he add that to the CV too?

I think it's perfectly reasonable to describe planning and communicating activities for four people in a family as comparable
The issue is that there is a big difference between booking a all inclusive holiday at the same place than the previous year, that will involve a 10 minutes on the internet, and organising a holiday in some obscur country from scratch, taking weeks.

As a recruiter, if I were to ask about organisation skills, and a SAHM explained how she organised such a holiday, giving detail on her creative thinking, how she gained information that meant she got an especially good deal, identified how to reduce risk of the unknown, and how she dealt on the trip with unexpected events, then I would without a doubt score her high.

Just saying that she arrange her summer holiday every year, that involves booking a flight and hotel, and trying to tell me that she's sure that similar to what would be expected in the job, she would get a 1 out of 5 at best.

I think the judgement one shows at home with a family is of a very different nature to professional/commercial/clinical judgment.

Most employers realise that entry level applicants will have to learn/build on the later in work. Which is fine.

The problem comes when an applicant attempts to show they already have it by evidencing domestic judgment which is not remotely comparable. The attempts show lack of judgment ( I know, I know, I'm here all week, tip your waitress, try the veal).

And any statement in a CV/interview that even whiffs of rudeness, moralising etc shows a person who is probably never going to learn good judgment. Or certainly not quick enough.

For those trying to get back in on a higher level, it's just breath taking idiocy.

Also do get friends in work to read your CV or application as what might seem perfectly okay to you in terms of descriptions and English is not for others. The more people who can read it through, particularly those who know about these things, the better.

I sold on ebay for 7 years while the kids were young- that's worth a mention on a CV.
Thankfully I don't think I will ever be writing a CV again.

cai if the turnover and profit made was good it is worth a mention.

But that's not part of being a SAHM. My 17 year old son does it
And he definitely doesn't have children .

Some of the examples of using initiative and of administrative, professional skills being described on here by recruiters are fairly common sense and basic. Most adults would be capable of doing these whether recent work experience or not.

Perhaps that's why applicants tie themselves in knots to prove they can do common sense stuff.

GetAHaircutCarl just a word of caution if your 17 yo son has a Paypal account- they are getting tough on under 18s operating accounts.
My DS had his account frozen and funds suspended for several months- although he is 19 he had opened the account as an under 18 which violates paypal policy.

That said, and recruiters on the thread will give their view, those writing a CV should avoid 'ancient history'.

My agent was recently recruiting and he found lots of CVs showcasing things people did years ago.

He felt it only served to high light that there wasn't anything current.

cai I think he uses his Dad's account.

I theory it's DH's business. But in reality it was DS idea and he runs it. We give him all the profits.

It seems to me that the worst people to discriminate SAHMs are women themselves!!! A very sad world we live in!!!

What is it with a small group of SAHMs getting out the tiny violins?

You get 200 applications. You can only interview 15. You have to look for reasons to cull applications.

As many people have said on this thread (both SAHM and WOHM), the key to a CV is relevance. So nobody has an issue with career breaks, family breaks, time out to raise children, but trying to dress up basic home running tasks as professional experience is simply a silly thing to do and will lead to people questioning your judgement (a perfectly reasonable thing to do when shortlisting!).

Keeping a CV or application relevant is a decent piece of advice.

Keeping any judgements about your parenting choices off your CV is also good advice.

These are true whether you're looking to return or already in the workforce.

There is no evidence that men are more open to female applicants whether they are returning to the work place or have recent experience.

Quite the contrary. Especially at senior levels. You just won't hear them discuss their views.

getahaircut- good for him.

DS does Bitcoin mining now to help support himself ( he is a student)
DD
Like your son my DD has been selling on ebay since she was 14.
They have watched me with my various financial ventures as a SAHM over the years and have seen how easy it is to make money at home.
Although both career minded and ambitious it's been useful for them to see how profitable an entrepreneurial spirit can be,
My online adventures have led to surprising financial rewards, I earn more than my OH now and I only work part time.

cai it sounds as if you haven't been a SAHM but a working parent who happened to work from home.

Which best describes me too ( although in recent years I have been working outside the home more often ).

Freelance, self employed, often working from home. That's me.

Well I've always called myself a SAHM.

I have had several projects over the years- all have done well, some have been more profitable than others. I have now stuck with one in particular that gives me a good profit. ( With another in the background humming along which could be ramped up again as back up)

My kids have always taken priority time wise. So when they were younger I would clear the decks for summer holidays, or if they were sick and work harder while they were at school.

It has only been because of my OHs willingness to financially support me that I have been able to do these ventures at all.
If we have been relying on me having a steady income and working for an employed none of this could have happened.
That's why I have always called myself a SAHM.
I have not had the pressures of a 9-5 job. But the luxury of entrepreneurial navel gazing.

calli but all that is working and would be relevant.

Dh runs our business. He also clears the decks for summer and christmas. Now we have employees its more difficult as we cant just leave them withour work. But he ensures he doesnt have to do more than a few hours here and there.

I take time off over summer and we soend it together. Same as Christmas. Dh closes on the 23rd december and opens around 3/4th jan. We oay the employees for that period.

I take dd to school. Dh takes ds and picks them both up and may work later when i am home or the kids are in bed. He organises work around the kids as he has the flexibility. I obviously do when possible (which it usually is).

My point is that dh business experience is professional experience as is yours. And its my wage that has given stability for years. Although now the business has a bugger profit in a year than i could ever earn.

Tbh its the perfect middle ground. And is keeping your skills relevant.

Our plan is that in 2 years i will also go back to working in the business to give us both that middle ground.

Setting up and running that business gave me the skills to get my last job and the one i am in now.

While some examples of the type of things OP describes reading on CVs is cringe and unprofessional, when I returned to work after 3 years as a SAHM, finding myself a single mum, I did in fact incorporate in my first job applications for work , 14 years ago), the skills and experience I had acquired whilst at home. Unfortunately, when competing with candidates with up to date work experience, I think it's helpful to list your transferable skills and there's nothing wrong with accounting for these using examples of SAHM roles. After all, accountability and evidence is key in today's job market. However, it's important to keep it relevant and writing self congratulatory / opinionated statements is just unprofessional and clearly rubs potential employers up the wrong way. Most parents have the domestic stuff to do as well as their jobs, although looking after kids FT tests the patience of most to the max and the ability to multitask becomes very well rehearsed. We should celebrate what we achieve but just pick our words and tone appropriately.

Sorry i was trying to say, you are working.

Lots of people have jobs, where the wage means they rely on their partners wage.

Exactly MaisiePops.

It's s small group of SAHM who seem determined to tell us how fantastic they are for sacrificing their (previously amazing) career to prioritise their kids, yet feel undervalued and overlooked when they decide they want to get back into the workplace.

(I emphasise- this is not all SAHM - I'm sure most are too busy enjoying their decision to bother posting)

The WOHM on here have for the most part given sound advice. When I'm recruiting we regularly have dozens of applications for each post. The initial cull is to weed out any applications which are poor and/or show a lack of judgement and understanding of what the job entails. If someone is keen to get back into work after a break it's so
Important that they present themselves in the best light; they could well be alongside another candidate who has children the same age and has been doing all the same things over the last few years, parenting, running a home (perhaps even sitting on the PTA too, because IME, if you want something doing, ask a busy woman...) while also remaining in the workplace.

It's a tough gig getting back into work- I've recruited a number of women in this position and have always supported them and admired their tenacity. But I've never for a moment thought that they've acquired some special skills just by virtue of having been SAHM ... I understand about parenting, I've raised 3 children, and yes it's amazing, magical, challenging, and a million other things- but not something to go on the cv!

I think maybe the problem is yours because you're a working ft single mum it's made you aware you don't stay at home with your children. That is what's bothering you not what these women put on their cvs.

That's on you not these other mothers. I think you're being rather judgmental!

But that's the whole point of CV's and application forms. To judge applicants. If people put daft things on forms then they will be judged accordingly.

Great projection there! Why not just read what the OP has written? And I'm sure she realised before now that she Gets up and goes to work- I doubt it took a ridiculous cv from a SAHM to enlighten her!