AIBU to think SAHMs shouldn't put this nonsense on a CV/job application

[windygallows]

In the last year I've recruited for numerous part-time jobs, receiving applications from many women who took time out to be with family and are now returning to work.

Many of the applicants have been straightforward and simply noted on their CV that they have been SAHM - simple.

But increasingly applicants, perhaps based on some guidance from career counsellors or MN, are finding more creative ways to describe their absence from the workforce.

One, we'll call her Mrs Jones, wrote that for 10 years she was employed by the 'Jones family' and that her work involved 'organizing international travel for her family.' Because organizing a holiday is similar to the tasks led by senior executives.

Another wrote a list of every task she did at home from getting groceries to cleaning the house which, while impressive as an exhaustive list, doesn't really mean much when applying to an office-based role. Especially as it's basically a list of everything most employees have to fit in outside of work.

More galling are the claims that women make about the critical role they played - with my favourite being the one who 'Spent 7 years looking after my two children who needed and deserved my attention.'

There is huge value in the work that SAHMs do but please, please don't put this kind of waffle on your CV. You never know if your interview panel will consist of a FT working, single mom like me who finds it pretty insulting that working means her children apparently lost out on 'the attention they needed and deserved.' Urgh.

Your last post was laughable Wendydale "oversee home repairs" = open door for electrician

Pushing data/products round the commercial world is secondary importance.

I'm the person making cutting edge cancer drugs that extend and save lives across the world- is that secondary importance?

People with jobs also oversee home repairs. I've manged to oversee loft extensions and major buildings work while having a job. I won't be putting it on my cv as I have proper stuff to put on!

Wendydate- big thumbs up.

Hollybuckets- "Anyone who lives as an adult "manages a household." Single, or married, or parenting one or 10 children." Missing the point somewhat.

I'm back at work after 12 years at home with a bit of self-employed work. Going to work- to a place that has been cleaned, conducting work uninterrupted, with colleagues who are polite and reasonable in a calm environment where I am valued, where people say someone's 'amazing' if they photocopy something for them or make them a cup of tea- is MILES less knackering. And my job has lots of responsibility- I'm in charge of 152 people, lead and guide strategy in a very specialist field. Easy peasy compared to being at home.

Gosh you must have made a big deal out of being at home then maireadplastic. I'm surprised you managed to last 12 years in such a fast paced, highly charged, challenging domestic environment.

I built my own house (while pregnant and fully employed.) hopefully that counts as overseeing ?

Sahp or wohp - do whatever works for your family. One isn't superior to the other.

Surely the debate here should be how best to get women back in the career market, or even better, regain more flexible working for BOTH parents so that one person doesn't have to ditch a career they may quite like? Here it's common for both parents to work 85% for a few years to juggle daycare and childcare.

What you put in your CV needs to be relevant to the job concerned. If it's relevant, it doesn't matter whether it's experience gained from being a SAHM, voluntary work or paid employment. If it's not relevant to the job description and person specification, then leave it out, or you look like you haven't made an effort to understand what the role requires. Simples. Some employers do get a bit up themselves about their jobs, though - plenty of jobs out there a competent SAHM, with all the skills that entails, could do standing on her head. What many SAHMs lack is a good quality referee, though, as a dh confirming she is really good at organisation, timekeeping, dealing with unreasonable people, budgeting, spreadsheets or whatever, isn't going to cut it. That's why voluntary work and further qualifications/verifiable evidence of having kept skills up to date whilst being a SAHM, are exceptionally useful.

run a home and household budget, oversee home repairs and appoint tradesmen etc etc etc

Those are pretty much anything a functional adult does - ensure they don't blow their wages on gin and haribo before the rent is paid, push a hoover around, pay a bill and call a plumber when water is gushing out of a pipe. I am incompetent buffoon and I manage all of the above whilst working full-time.

Working is of secondary importance. ? And those that do aren't getting your priorities right ?

Do you live on planet earth? Where most people even have a choice?

Yes, we;ve all done the building porjects whilst breastfeeding the baby all night and then working in the City all day. It's no big deal. Some people can hardly organise a trip to the shops and other people are great at it. I know stay at home mothers with a house keeper, nanny and gardener... mind you I suppose those ones would say they are even more experienced than those who clean their own floors as they have managed the team! I was suggesting a rich person's man servant to my recently for a job although he wasn't keen but those jobs often need someone who knows how to boko the best hotels, get you a table at XYZ, clear up cat sick as required, keep the housekeeper happy, drive the principal around and evade kidnappers as required.

"Oversee home repairs" made me laugh.

Your last post was laughable Wendydale "oversee home repairs" = open door for electrician

Yes quite ludicrous padding, it is like when people discuss the division of tasks in the home and cite arranging car/house insurance/TV licence and paying bills as part of their duties.

So that'd be 5 minutes on compare the market one or twice a year to set up insurance and two minutes setting a direct debit for the bills.

I haven't read all the replies but was so irked I had to say. As a single, working Mum I can verify that I have a huge, mental to-do list at work that flips into "Mrs Jones'" home to-do list when I leave for the day. I wouldn't grace her with an interview.

I really don't understand why this is so bad. I've had to look at some really awful CV's and all kind of bragging goes on... and it is not usually SAHM's...

Instead of making up ludicrous job 'skills' and 'roles' associated with stay at home parenthood, why not put 'SAHP - duties included watching loose women whilst drinking coffee and scratching my arse' It won't worsen your chances of getting the job and it might give the recruiters a laugh.

BoysofMeloday While hilarious this displays why SAHP's may feel so devalued?

How much does it cost to be courteous and respectful of others?

LittleScaredyCat "Bragging" about skills that the employer needs is very different to "bragging" about the ability to do day-to-day chores that all employees do as a matter of course.

Babbity. You sound aggressive. Are you okay?

Imo sahps who bang on about how hard it is are the main reason it isn't respected. Because those of us who combine it with woh too know damn well it isn't.

It might only be a minority who fall into the hard done to, martyr superior parent sahp group, but if that's the only group you ever hear from then it is understandable someone might come to the conclusion they are less capable. And even though I don't think that way about sahps, as a lone parent who works I do find it feeble when sahps with working dps bleat about their hardships. Luckily for society most sahps are normal people who made a different choice rather than like some on here.

It's harsh dismissing SAHMs because they felt that they couldn't leave their children at home. That's their prerogative, just like other women make a choice that they feel they need to work, and others don't have much of a choice at all. You're discounting them for the decision they made? Yes SAHMs make it more difficult for themselves to get back into work, but I don't think they expected never to be given a chance, because someone didn't agree with the choices they made, instead of assessing them on their skills or performance in an interview.

You sounds passive aggressive mairead.

I'm fine, thanks for asking

Springishere- you're misreading the thread. If a parent doesn't feel able to leave their children, then that's fine (though it still begs the question of why it's so many mums, so few dads...) But ultimately that's fine if that's what a family choose. But to mention that in a job application is completely irrelevant. Totally. You just put 'career break', 'career break to care for children' etc

And no one is discounting SAHP, just pointing out that all things being equal, a candidate who has remained in work is going to have the edge over someone who hasn't.

I've been thinking since last night about what recognition SAHPs should have, and read the thoughts on here on that...and yeah, I'm coming to the conclusion that people who choose to SAHP for their family's benefit presumably get their recognition/validation/call it what you will from their families, since they're doing it for them. If you want recognition in the form of money or something tangible in a more objective setting, then that's work.

I can't really think of suitable 'recognition' for SAHPs outside of that, except for respecting everyone's decision to do what they feel is best for themselves and their situation.

Pooryorick- agree.

I have asked several times on this thread what the SAHM who complain of feeling unvalued want, and who they want it from.

You would think they would get the recognition that they want from their partner, who presumably is in agreement with the arrangement. I can't see how or why it's Relevant to anyone else.

If a SAHP feels that their partner doesn't appreciate what they do (and there are threads on MN from people in this position) then they need to have a frank discussion with their partner and be prepared to renegotiate arrangements if necessary.

Ending "flame away" is a little self-preserving move so you don't have to engage with reasonable disagreement as you've already internalised us as flamers
I agree.

Absolutely smells of 'I am so awesome because I chose to stay at home with my children. This shows I have priorities u like the rest of you & if you say otherwise then you're clearly a mean and nasty woman who feels guilty about not giving their children what they need so flame me on a chat board'.

As many people have said SAHP is a valid decision. It's perfectly fine to have a career break around family. Please don't return to the workforce claiming that basic adult tasks like household management are relevant to most jobs as if opening the door for the builders and cooking tea each night needs a gold star.