To tell this mum off?

[Potterhead113]

I was on a long bus journey in central London yesterday (35 minutes) and a woman and two children got on (aged 6 and 3) and sat Behind me. After 2 minutes the 3 year old proceeded to jump up and down and scream and hit my chair. After less than 5 minutes of this I turned around and asked the mum to get the child to stop as it was annoying me and the screaming was annoying an elderly lady down the bus. 10 minutes later and the child is still doing it and mum is doing nothing. I turned around again and said 'if you won't parent your children I will' and I told the child nicely to please stop. The child stopped for the rest of their journey. The mum made noises and muttered the whole time about how rude I was and how I obviously must hate children (I don't)
WIBU?

[missmollyhadadolly]

Is that your excuse missmolly you should try reading more then rather than picking and choosing.

What on earth are you actually on about, Horrid? I've told you which post I was responding to. Go and try your keyboard warrior-ing on someone else.

And I don't believe you that someone kicking the back of your seat wouldn't bother you.

[woodhill]

I'd be really p**d off if a dc was kicking my seat on public transport. Could the dc not have any boundaries possibly. Why is SN always thrown in.

[HorridHenryrule]

Misdymolly read the thread properly and try to understand what people are talking about.

[HorridHenryrule]

Misdymolly read the thread properly and try to understand what people are talking about.

[HorridHenryrule]

Missmolly

You posted the putter-uppers she has a child with sen.

[Mycarsmellsoflavender]

YANBU - she had the chance, didn't take it, she sounds like she is hopeless and not coping - you did her a favour.

By criticising and humiliating her? I'm sure that'll do wonders for her self esteem if she's struggling to cope.

Absolutely fine to speak directly to the child and ask her to stop. Not fine to criticise the adult's parenting skills. I don't like the terminology you used - you were not ' parenting ' the child - you were telling her to stop.

[bakedbeansandtuna]

I would have given you a round of applause OP.

[PodgeBod]

In my opinion, whether or not you are going through a hard time or have PND the wellbeing of strangers in public is far more important and you should address your children that you chose to have as such.*
The wellbeing of strangers having your seat kicked on an almost-empty bus is annoying, it's not going to kill you.

*Also I do not see the need to go to church, being religious does not make you a good person and I think I have enough empathy for those who need it. PND should not impact on your ability to stop your children being disruptive.

No, you do need to work on your empathy and your understanding of mental health if you think PND should not impact on somebody's parenting. You clearly don't have children (you would have said by now if you did) so why don't you consider that you have no idea what that woman might be dealing with.
I'm sure if it was less of an easy target you would not have been making spiteful comments. But since it was just a mother and child, you decided to get your kicks putting someone else down.

[kali110]

having your seat kicked on an almost-empty bus is annoying, it's not going to kill you.
No, it wouldn't kill me, but it would leave me in more pain than im already in everyday.

The op probably didn't word it best and could have been nicer, but having your seat kicked when you're not disabled is irritating enough, especially when you've asked it to stop.

[Skylander01]

I used to get some awful stares when my DS was acting up because I wasn't disciplining him. I was actually ignoring the bad behaviour. This is what I do - lead by example, encourage and congratulate good behaviour and ignore bad. Believe me - I'd I had tried to discipline him it would have been a lot worse and a lot more upsetting for everyone nearby. Just a theory?
However as a harsh word from a stranger does sometimes shock a child into behaving I would have been grateful for the help! Better than the looks and tuts everywhere.

[milliemolliemou]

So are we agreed?

OP was right to ask the mother to tell DC not to kick the back of her seat.

After 10 minutes, this hadn't happened.

OP makes unempathetic and sneery comment "if you don't parent your child, I will." Massive thumbs down because she doesn't understand what the mother is dealing with.

However OP then tells the child who stops banging the back of the seat. Cheers all round. Possibly also from elderly lady who was also being disturbed by the noise and fracas. Possibly also from child's mother (apart from being upset by the slur) who was glad her child was finally quiet.

Any more to be said.

[SerfTerf]

Is this a new summary, truth and reconciliation service you're offering millie? 😄

Do we nominate threads in need of it by PM?