Extremely scary moment when driver blocked my car on a country lane.

[ginplease8383]

I was out driving on the Blackdown hills today with my 1 year old and 3 year old DD trying to find Wellington monument. I know its pretty easy to find being pretty large but I am a bit of an idiot with driving and thought i knew the way (being relatively local) and it turned out I didn't.

Anyway, I went into a country lane and did a U turn to correct myself as I didn't want to U turn on one of the larger roads and as I was coming out onto the more main road another car (a 4X4 with 2 men in it aged mid 50s) also was doing a u turn (or so i thought initially). The driver blocked my exit out of the junction (They could see me drive up to it) as I attempted to turn left and I assumed he was stopping to turn into my lane so I attempted to veer left and drive around him and he blocked me again. I did it again and he did it again.

I didn't want to stop and wind down my window it being the middle of the countryside and that I had 2 young children in the back but he trapped me. In the end i had to and he wound down his window and he said 'I was just going to ask you how to get to xx', I was upset and panicking by then and screamed at him 'How dare you block my path!! Get out of the way!'. My heart was racing and I called dh straight away and gave him a description of the car just in case and set off hime (I didn't go to Wellington monument in the end).

AIBU? I can kind of understand if there was an accident and they needed a first aider but surely i made it perfectly clear i didnt want to stop- I was shitting myself to be honest.

Exactly, phones have Google maps on them, no excuse! How do you know they just want to scare women!

I'm thinking about many other threads about intimidating men, known or unknown, where the consensus has been "trust your gut reaction" and the book "The Gift of Fear" has been referred to. The OP is getting a hard time from some daft people with their heads in the sand about male violence towards women. Being naice and compliant has been the death of many women.... fuck that. Glad you got away from them, OP.

YANBU OP, I would have been screaming and bibbing like a loony. Probably 999ing as well if possible.

The gullibility of some posters is astonishing. Who cares if they had been lost, it's not the Sahara desert, they wouldn't have died.

Hi MrsCB, totally agree with Gavin DeBecker recommendation!

Did someone mention sheep? Because two men in a 4x4 not knowing where the fuck they are and intimidating a woman into telling them, certainly tells me that they are local sheep farmers...

Ffs. What does it actually take for people to recognise male violence, the potential for male violence, the threat of male violence and the fact that intimidating and aggressive behaviour is characteristic of male violence.

As the My Favourite Murder podcast says, Fuck Politeness.

If you are in a vunerable position and someone's behaviour is making you feel uncomfortable or scared, you should not have to meekly put up with it because you're a woman! If you are wrong and their intentions were innocent, no harm done and you're just a bit rude, if their intentions are not innocent, you have just escaped. No man would put up with being blocked in by a big car three fucking times!

Someone who was clearly being an idiot. Anyone moving animals would have parked their car and got out for a start, as cattle and sheep are not known for their intelligence and sense of direction. Shepards usually carry a crook often solely in order to signal 'sorry, moving sheep here'.

Plus 4x4s aren't lorries, you would be able to see the animals.

pulling forwards to clear the junction in a way that looked like they were blocking you in 3 times? What kind of crappy driver do you think they were? OP, yadnbu and well done.

Well done ginplease. Glad you got out of there safely.

Blocking someone with you car (3 times) is NOT in any way, shape or form how you ask for directions, not in town and not in the country, unless you are an arrogant pair of fucking arseholes, in which case you deserve to get screamed at.

The majority of people can see/sense friendly body language a mile off and the same applies to driving behaviour. Did they wind down a window giving friendly waves and smiley gestures to ask the OP to stop? Nope, just blocking. Not up to anything good. This is a good reminder to trust our instincts. Glad you called it in to 101 OP :)

Is it an area with bad phone reception too by any chance?

People moving livestock don't try to block other drivers in. They tell you they're moving a herd or a flock, where they're taking them, and where it's best to put your vehicle.

Well actually round where I live they stop for a chat whilst the flock carry on to the next open field but they're a bit laid back round here.

The other driver was a dick, but to be so upset that you were screaming and had to cancel your trip to the monument is a huge over-reaction unless there is something else that you haven't told us

Is it an area with bad phone reception too by any chance?

There is no end to to the lengths people will go to excuse men's aggressive behaviour.

Even if they were genuinely lost, in an area of genuine bad reception, they still have no right to aggressively block anyone in at a junction 3 times.

They behaved very weirdly, you were not wrong to be concerned. I bet it got your adrenaline going a lot. Try not to think about it no (((OP)))

What does it actually take for people to recognise male violence, the potential for male violence, the threat of male violence and the fact that intimidating and aggressive behaviour is characteristic of male violence

I don't know. I get the impression that being smacked round the head repeatedly with a brick would leave some posters saying "oh but he was only asking for directions".

No no, ShoesHaveSouls, read my other posts - I meant that might have been another reason they did it, because she would have limited ability to phone anyone. I can see why you thought that though based on the horrendous other responses here!

Actually, after a visit to Cornwall I have learned that google maps still loads with no phone reception. It won't load the sat nav but it will load the actual map.

Apologies, Buttercunt

No worries, can see why it looked like that!

You did not over react. We have no way to tell if other people are safe or not; other than by their behaviour.
If people behave in a way that could be construed as dangerous, it is not your job to work out if they are just stupid or actually a risk.

Its entirely possible that they saw the kids, and with you screaming changed their minds and let you go. Do you feel ok to report this to the police?

YANBU - I think they saw (what they thought was) a lone woman in a car and they wanted to get a kick out of intimidating and scaring you.

Olenna - just curious as to what reaction you consider acceptable to two men repeatedly blocking a lone woman's car on an isolated road?

What does it actually take for people to recognise male violence, the potential for male violence, the threat of male violence and the fact that intimidating and aggressive behaviour is characteristic of male violence

I've been asking myself this question since I was a teenager!

There's no way those guys didn't know they were being intimidating.

I was going to mention the Gift of Fear but I see someone already has. Grownup women with their shit together generally don't feel fear in this way without good reason. I think there's every chance that OP's reaction actually saved her from something unpleasant.

If I were OP I would actually report it to police on 101.