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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Extremely scary moment when driver blocked my car on a country lane.

449 replies

ginplease8383 · 14/08/2017 17:07

I was out driving on the Blackdown hills today with my 1 year old and 3 year old DD trying to find Wellington monument. I know its pretty easy to find being pretty large but I am a bit of an idiot with driving and thought i knew the way (being relatively local) and it turned out I didn't.

Anyway, I went into a country lane and did a U turn to correct myself as I didn't want to U turn on one of the larger roads and as I was coming out onto the more main road another car (a 4X4 with 2 men in it aged mid 50s) also was doing a u turn (or so i thought initially). The driver blocked my exit out of the junction (They could see me drive up to it) as I attempted to turn left and I assumed he was stopping to turn into my lane so I attempted to veer left and drive around him and he blocked me again. I did it again and he did it again.

I didn't want to stop and wind down my window it being the middle of the countryside and that I had 2 young children in the back but he trapped me. In the end i had to and he wound down his window and he said 'I was just going to ask you how to get to xx', I was upset and panicking by then and screamed at him 'How dare you block my path!! Get out of the way!'. My heart was racing and I called dh straight away and gave him a description of the car just in case and set off hime (I didn't go to Wellington monument in the end).

AIBU? I can kind of understand if there was an accident and they needed a first aider but surely i made it perfectly clear i didnt want to stop- I was shitting myself to be honest.

OP posts:
Jux · 15/08/2017 20:07

As I said upthread, I live in the Blackdowns area. There are some real twats about. Boys dd went school with - I know there are quite a few who would just do this for a laugh, "let's go play with some tourists.... ". I know there are lads who would do crap like this, meaning no real harm but causing harm anyway. Thoughtless and stupid.

Were they youngish? I hope the police have identified them and they feel the full force of the law. I have no sympathy for them, none at all. The disrespect which some of the 'men' show towards women is disgusting and very troubling.

ButtHoleinOne · 15/08/2017 20:07

The op has "issues" because

Because you were extremely scared and screamed at someone asking you directions

What utter shit. In what world is what they not aggressive and creepy?

Gabilan · 15/08/2017 20:22

Were they youngish?

Mid 50s according to the OP

ollieplimsoles · 15/08/2017 21:10

Just finished reading the thread.

I would have reacted in exactly the same way as the op, i sometimes get panicky if im alone on the street or in the park with my dd and a man i dont know starts walking towards me. I have a diagnosed anxiety disorder.

Blocking someone's path twice to get directions is really quite weird.

bemusedmoose · 15/08/2017 22:48

I would have been pretty freaked out to be honest - that's 1) really bad driving on his part! 2) really threatening. What he did is not exceptable at all.

There are a lot of gangs that do stuff like this to rob and attack people. It's scarily common. So to all those people who have said there's something wrong with her or over reacting - what the hell would you do - pop out, hand over your valuables and pour a nice cup of tea for them!? How they hell did she know they wanted directions!? That behaviour is aggressive and threatening, not need directions behaviour, that would be fully open window, waving and 'can you help?' Even then, i'd be wary on a quiet road with two guys. I'd have windows up and central locking on.

The only one with something wrong is someone that thinks these guys were ok doing it!

Abbylee · 16/08/2017 01:58

No GPS? Of course OP was frightened. BTW, nobody knows for certain that they were telling the truth. Could be an excuse for being a jerK.

Flyfisherlady · 16/08/2017 07:00

That's horrendous. Blocking you wasn't about the directions they claimed to need, it was a way to exert control over a lone woman. What dicks. Call the police.

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 16/08/2017 07:15

God there are some wankers on MN. I wonder if half of them bother to read the actual OP, because why else would they be saying "the man only wanted to ask directions"

How the fuck was the OP meant to know that?!!!!. She was in her car getting blocked in!

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 16/08/2017 07:54

In a bizarre way I feel that this thread should be moved into Classics because it's a perfect demonstration of victim-blaming in action.

kyph09 · 16/08/2017 08:02

I hate how "hysterical" is so easily used to describe (only) women that dare to show emotion Hmm

PollytheDolly · 16/08/2017 08:16

Directions my arse! Angry

Hope the police catch up with them soon and you're ok OP. Flowers

WindyWednesday · 16/08/2017 09:06

Quick synopsis for those not bothered to read the thread.

OP gets blocked in by a car with two men in isolated road.

This only stopped at the third time, because this is when the OP wound down her window to yell at the men to get out of her way.

At that point, and at no other time, did they say they needed directions.

WindyWednesday · 16/08/2017 09:08

Also on there have been other reports in the same area of the same thing. Same car, same men.

The police are now aware of these men and are taking it very seriously.

OhhBetty · 16/08/2017 09:51

I wouldn’t have screamed like that in front of my son. I'd have ensured the doors were locked, windows up and beeped at them and called the police if they didn't move. But, I've been in loads of "situations" so perhaps deal differently?

Slimthistime · 16/08/2017 10:34

Betty "I wouldn’t have screamed like that in front of my son. "

screaming was probably key to them going away.

kittybiscuits · 16/08/2017 10:36

I would close the windows and call the police - on a country lane - good luck with that.

Italiangreyhound · 16/08/2017 11:17

Op hope you are OK.

YADNBU.

I would have terrified. They are actually lucky you did not ram their car!

I have not read it all but hope you reported them and hope they are caught.

To the people early on this thread who think the OP overreacted, it must be nice to live in your head where two men blocking a lone female in repeatedly on a country lane is not a cause for concern - but you clearly do not live in the real world!

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 16/08/2017 11:35

Exactly Italian. Well said.

Aeroflotgirl · 16/08/2017 13:15

OHHHbetty sounds like this is the first time it has happened to her, so instincts kicked in. I am glad screaming is the only thing the kids heard, as it could have been worse if she had remained in that situation.

Sadmum987 · 16/08/2017 15:59

I'm actually with op here. I'd not have screamed probably but I'd have been a bit freaked out by these men. I'd never stop
For anyone (unless obvious emergency)
In that kind of situation and I think that they should have realised after the first attempt to get past it was a no go.

Slimthistime · 16/08/2017 18:01

sadmum, why wouldn't you scream?

it's been my experience that a really loud bellow, especially with swears, is the best way to get men to fuck off.

WellThisIsShit · 16/08/2017 18:08

As Italian posted:

"To the people early on this thread who think the OP overreacted, it must be nice to live in your head where two men blocking a lone female in repeatedly on a country lane is not a cause for concern - but you clearly do not live in the real world!"

One of the most shocking things on this thread has been the way the mans word has been repeatedly accepted as The Truth, and the woman's word has been naturally assumed to be flawed and inaccurate just because err, Men Right?!

Even when the man's attempt at an explanation is strongly contradicted by his actions, its adopted as the One True reality and the women has been chastised for being stupid enough not to interpret the situation in that way... although the actions in no way add up to that 'explanation' and make no sense in that context.

It's also assumed that it's somehow ok to block someone's only exit over and over again is a perfectly harmless and pleasant way to ask for directions. When we all know it's very much NOT the way any normal and non threatening person would ask for directions, especially given the lack of wound down windows, gestures or well, anything that people normally do when asking for directions!

At what point will we listen to women? When we prefer to ridicule a woman for reacting to the potential threat in a situation which could only ever be interpreted as threatening... but fully embrace the poor ickle hurt menz who've Manplained the situation by err, giving a completely unlikely excuse that's used alot in car crime scenarios.

But hey, stupid hysterical woman. Clearly was a farmer durrr. Minus the herd, minus the gates, minus the positioning of the 4x4 in the correct position and minus ANY indicator of farming or cattle herding at all.

But yup, stupid blood woman hey, over reacting again...

HeyRoly · 16/08/2017 18:15

Round of applause WellThisIsShit Grin

I'm also amazed by the numbers of people who are so confident that they wouldn't have yelled at the men, bearing in mind it's impossible to predict how scared and/or angry you'd be if it were you. It's one thing to say you'd be cool and calm and reasonable from the comfort of your sofa...

LostGarden · 16/08/2017 18:52

Joining in the round of applause for WellThisIsShit.

Datun · 16/08/2017 19:06

Even if they were farmers, even if they were asking for directions, they still deserve to be shouted at for their stupid and threatening behaviour.

None of it is justifiable.