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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to have sex in friend's spare room?

45 replies

McTufty · 11/08/2017 09:17

DH and I are trying for a baby and ovulation test this morning indicates I'm super fertile for the next two days.

Problem is, we are going straight from work to visit friends for the weekend and staying in their spare room.

Is it a dick move to shag in someone's house while their guest for the weekend?

It's not a terribly small house, it's a 3 bed semi. They do have a toddler if that makes a difference.

OP posts:

user1498586391 · 11/08/2017 09:18

Stick some tunes on as if you were getting ready, wedge the door closed... and tell him to be quick.

Needs must!!

Velvetbee · 11/08/2017 09:19

Do it.
Try not to be loud.

CosmicPineapple · 11/08/2017 09:19

Unless you are going to tell her after and describe it in detail YANBU.

LadyWithLapdog · 11/08/2017 09:20

Just don't be loud (or messy!)

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 · 11/08/2017 09:23

Aslong as you won't be swinging from the light fitting or being exceptionally loud I don't see anything wrong with it.

Please don't do what my friend did. A few of us waiting in the Living room for her as we was heading for a few drinks, she popped upstairs because she "forgot" something.

We listened to her and her husband at it for about ten minutes. We tried doing idle chit chat amongst us at first, you know try and drown out the squeaking bed and a few groans. The efforts became useless because they suddenly turned it up a notch. Honestly at some points I thought they was attacking each other with the sounds filling the house. I had never heard anything like it, it was like they was trying too out scream each other because towards the end it was just screams. I felt sorry for their neighbours. We all sat in the Living room awkwardly silent just wishing it would be other. She came down with her hair ruffled and panting and said ready to go.

belmontian · 11/08/2017 09:23

If you can have super quiet stealth sex then it might be ok although I still wouldn't. I would be pearl clutching if a guest of mine (especially for 1 night) was having sex and we could hear it.

ShatnersWig · 11/08/2017 09:25

You driving to your friends? Quick one against a tree on the way?

sweetbitter · 11/08/2017 09:25

I think it's fine as long as you're not audible.

crashandburnt · 11/08/2017 09:25

Oh god it's fine. I wouldn't care a jot. Just try and be quiet!

loaferloveforyou · 11/08/2017 09:26

If I was your friend it wouldn't bother me in the slightest as long as I didn't have to clear up the mess.

user1471548375 · 11/08/2017 09:29

If you were staying at mine I wouldn't care in the slightest

rightsofwomen · 11/08/2017 09:33

If they have a toddler then they must have had sex themselves at least once. I think you're good to go DS1 was conceived on a mate's bathroom floor

AnyFucker · 11/08/2017 09:35

Go for it. Quietly.

HerOtherHalf · 11/08/2017 09:39

Keep it quiet and don't leave them with a horrific wet patch to deal with and you should be fine. Oh, and learn from my mistakes and check there isn't a baby monitor in the room.

clickhappy · 11/08/2017 09:39

Put a towel down and be quiet.

HipsterHunter · 11/08/2017 09:40

Totally fine. Just don't make loud sex noises or get bodily fluids on the sheets!

Original poster

McTufty · 11/08/2017 09:45

Ah brilliant! Thanks all. We will definitely keep the noise down and hope it's not a creaky bed (and check there's no baby monitor - @herotherhalf ooops!!! That made me laugh)

Maybe we will stop against a tree on the way as well for good measure @shatnerswig

I'll let you all know if your excellent advice results in a baby!

OP posts:

LadyWithLapdog · 11/08/2017 09:46

Don't name your child after your friends' town or cottage.

SimpleCreature · 11/08/2017 09:46

Just make sure you wash the penis beaker afterwards.

TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 11/08/2017 09:48

Take a towel with you and change the sheets before you leave. If you offer to put them straight in washing machine on last morning I'm sure your friends will be happy.

ApplesTheHare · 11/08/2017 09:53

TheSnork Wouldn't that give the game away??

I'd love a friend who was ttc to do it at my house (well not love, but I'd be supportive, iyswim ) but wouldn't necessarily want to know about it. I'm sure if OP and her DP are sensible nobody would ever know!

IdiotSandwich · 11/08/2017 09:53

The key is not to do it on the bed. All beds make noise and squeak. Take the duvet off the bed and plop on the floor then go for it doggy style (gently though). That seems to be the quietest.

Winterview · 11/08/2017 09:55

I wouldn't do it on the bed in case you mark the sheets or it creaks. Better to stand up and bend forward, resting your elbows on the bed. And wedge the door shut with something if there's no lock.

I wouldn't mind friends having sex in our guestroom, as long as they're discreet and don't leave too much mess. All guest bedding gets washed on a hot bio cycle and we have a mattress protector!

mummmy2017 · 11/08/2017 09:55

If the bed squeaks try the floor.
good luck.
oh and trying to be quiet, that can be quiet erotic.

crazypenguinlady · 11/08/2017 10:00

Yep agree with the others. Be quiet and don't make a mess. If you were my friend and knew you were TTC, I probably shoo you away to the bedroom myself

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