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Go fund me...people taking the piss

130 replies

Wonders71 · 04/08/2017 09:41

Someone on fb has set up a go fund me page for her best friend to get married the write up says how they are soulmates they have been together years and their dream is to get married but with working long hours and family commitments and paying bills they are asking for donations! I think it's a piss take!

OP posts:
JaneEyre70 · 04/08/2017 11:19

A friend of my mums crowdfunded for an electric wheelchair after being told that she couldn't have one on the NHS/charities as she didn't meet the criteria (ie she was a lazy cow that refused to walk). She found one of those awful medical equipment salespeople and managed to raise £4k for something that is completely unsuitable for her needs and her OT/physio have told her isn't safe for her to use as she's too heavy for it Hmm. Her parents are extremely wealthy and she lives off a trust fund. I can't believe that anyone donates to such causes tbh, and after the Charlie Gard case for crowdfunding, I hope some steps to regulating them comes in. People should at least be warned that their money could be used for literally anything.

Mychildcouldnotbreaatfeed · 04/08/2017 11:20

Agree. Hate them being promoted on social media - Facebook and the like. Even here. It really irritates me.

If someone wants to donate, of course, it's up to them but it's not at all a charity and shouldn't be confused with the sort of regulation a charity gets

Girty999 · 04/08/2017 11:20

What would everyone ask for, just for fun. I'd like first class tickets to London and a tonne of spending money for nice things and I'd like to go in the aquarium then have a night in a hotel all on my own with a huge squishy bed, Netflix and zillion thread count sheets. My sob story isn't original I'm just a mum in the summer holidays losing my shit x

Nearly10to9 · 04/08/2017 11:25

Fuck off. If you can afford three kids you can bloody afford to get married haha - totally!

WhamBarsArentAsFizzyAsTheyWere · 04/08/2017 11:25

I would ask for enough money for 100000 curly wurlies and to hire Gerard butler for a day

Cantseethewoods · 04/08/2017 11:37

I don't understand why people respond to personal appeals/crowdfunding. It's all way too murky and unregulated and even when the intentions are good there's often 'leakage' and reallocation. With the medical ones there is also usually major straw clutching going on where people are donating money to fund unproven treatments. As the Dax things shows, it's pretty hard to get any comeback unless you're prepared to pursue s class action lawsuit and even then it would be very difficult.

Nearly10to9 · 04/08/2017 11:39

100000 curly wurlies thats only £20k (if you get the 5 for £1)

and to hire Gerard butler you can have a butler for the day for ....Butler Salary Guide
Starting salaries are £ GBP 800 net per week
(www.nannybutler.com/private-household/butler/)
The precise duties of the employee will vary to some extent in line with the title given, but more importantly in line with the requirements of the individual employer. His tasks can include arranging dinner parties, looking after your yacht, making travel arrangements, maintaining the household budget, looking after visitors, doing the laundry, getting the kids off to school, tending the garden, and directing other workers in the household.

i dint know how much Gerard would cost, but you can start here (www.allamericanspeakers.com/booking-request.php?SpName=Gerard-Butler)

I clearly have too much time on my hands!

Evilstepmum01 · 04/08/2017 11:39

Whambars (I nearly wrote whambam there)

Yes, it was fuckin awful. I donated (in cash) and it makes me sick to think I funded her house! I dont know if she was charged with fraud-she was certainly investigated.
Despite her life threatening condition, she had another child.

IIRC, she didnt even apologise.

Cantseethewoods · 04/08/2017 11:39

That said I did donate to a friend who wanted to make a documentary film about a certain social issue where we live. She raised 100k, made the movie and it's been very effective in drawing attention to this issue. she made no money out of it- the 100k was production costs.

lilygirl81 · 04/08/2017 11:46

I think ones like that are really cheeky, and take away from the ones that could really help. I've recently set one up to try and fund a new wheelchair that would literally change my life, but felt really awkward about letting people know because there are so many frivolous ones

WhamBarsArentAsFizzyAsTheyWere · 04/08/2017 11:49

IIRC, she didnt even apologise.

No she didn't, she couldn't as she still maintained she did nothing wrong despite the statement from the doctor.

There are a lot of angry people, sadly next time something like this happens in our community I don't think people will be so generous.

Witchend · 04/08/2017 11:50

I sort of can see the point as a sort of "passing a kindness on". So maybe when you're just starting out and need a car but can't afford it and someone helps pay. Then when you're earning more you then pay back towards someone who is starting out and needs a car...
I think in that way it is quite nice.

However, I'm afraid I haven't personally seen many that I don't think of as either grabby, legalised begging or "well that's not necessary, save up the money yourself"!
Medical ones particularly rile me. I have some knowledge of certain conditions. Of those I have known either the person or the condition I can count on the elbows of both arms the number that I wouldn't put in the scam to obtaining money by deception.

As a general rule if they say no provided by NHS in the condition I know best, most of the time they mean either "The NHS doesn't provide them because they won't help" or along the lines of "this is an easy way of getting money and I'll "discover" quietly the NHS does pay when I've got the money in".
I've seen the BBC webpage promoting some of these, often with lies that would be disproved if they spoke to anyone with a small knowledge.

I think there is a case for bringing in regulations. At time I feel it gets uncomfortably close to beggars using disabled children in the Victorian age to increase their takings.
Firstly it encourages those (usually American) doctors doing "trials" than never come to anything and don't work.

Secondly, I think it is easy to pull at the heartstrings with a sob story, and that's fine. But a lot of the time how do we know it's true. I could set one up with a photo of one of my dc at a relevant age saying they need money for X condition. Yes, it will be harder to bring in newspapers etc support if it's not true, but I'll bet it happens, and if they bring in a few thousands, then do it again with a different story. How many of those are followed up and money returned.

Thirdly, it can sometimes be what the parents/person wants not necessarily what's best for them. I can remember being at a meeting and a parent was fuming about what he could get on the NHS for his child's disability. Some people were shocked at the meanness of the NHS-he'd brought along the adaption to show everyone how rubbish it was. However the reason why he could bring it along was not because it was rubbish, but because his dc not only didn't need an adaption, but actively didn't want it-nor do almost all people in their position. He wanted it because he thought it would be better for them. They (and others with the condition) would disagree.

A leading surgeon said at a meeting I was at that parents often want what he offers out of guilt. They want to make it as near "right" as possible. he has to tease out before deciding whether to go ahead whether the child (if old enough) actually wants it, and whether it will be helpful for the child in the long run. If the answer to either is "no" then he has to consider whether to continue. In the case of the former he will make sure that the child is refusing from a point of understanding, and the latter it very rarely is ethical to go ahead.

BadgersBum · 04/08/2017 11:50

A friend of mine recently won a wedding competition, they only got the use of the location though, it was up to them how fancy they made it from that point on. They have been together years and have 2 kids, always planned to tie the knot someday, but there was always something else to spend money on. They were planning on having a quick register office do soon so it was lovely that they got a bit of an upgrade ... they still kept it quite simple, but in a beautiful venue.

BadgersBum · 04/08/2017 11:55

After the Manchester terror attack an acquaintance of mine set one up to fund her 'having a bumble bee tattoo with the excess received to go to the charity'. I basically told her to piss off and pay for her own tattoo and I made a donation through someone without the 'ink related overheads'. I think she basically wanted a free tattoo and some 'look at the good I'm doing' attention, without it costing her a penny!

LoyaltyAndLobster · 04/08/2017 11:56

YANBU
I can't believe the audacity of some people!

ImperialBlether · 04/08/2017 12:01

This reply has been deleted

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ImperialBlether · 04/08/2017 12:05

coddiwomple Those earrings are gorgeous! Note the "Quantity" box... how many would you like? And there's a "Drop a Hint" link, which will email someone to tell them you're daydreaming about them" - I dare you to send that to your husband Grin

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 04/08/2017 12:08

I'd like a Ferrari and a mansion with a swimming pool, but I'm afraid at the moment I'm whistling Dixie and stuck with my banger and my 3 bed semi.

ReanimatedSGB · 04/08/2017 12:09

If you don't want to pay, don't pay. There will always be gullible mugs - some so gullible that it's kind of a public service to take their money. Outright fraud is, of course, a crime that should be prosecuted but cheekyfuckery of this specific type is only going to 'hurt' those who have the money and gullibility to spare.

Evilstepmum01 · 04/08/2017 12:09

WhamBam

sadly next time something like this happens in our community I don't think people will be so generous.

And that is a shame. For the selfishness of one person, people have lost their trust in so-called good causes.

P.s Gerard Butler and curly-wurlies.....hell yes!! Grin

ShelaghTurner · 04/08/2017 12:10

It’s not something I’d ever dream of doing, but I tend to think if you don’t ask you don’t get. It’s the individual’s choice to donate or not donate and most people know that Go Fund Me is a personal fundraiser and not a charity one. As long as that’s clear then crack on. You might be lucky and get what you want or you might get your arse handed to you. You takes your chances Grin

badtime · 04/08/2017 12:15

A friend of mine used to joke about setting up a website called 'Go Fund Yourself' to record (well, shame really) ridiculous grabby crowdfunding requests.

StealthPolarBear · 04/08/2017 12:16

There are laws about how much money you can give to another individual in one go, are there similar laws about receiving sums?
Ps I need a new car, thanks.

HateSummer · 04/08/2017 12:17

Working long hours, bills and family commitments 😂😂😂. Yes, that's normal life. No one is forcing you to get married. Sneaky little shits.

AlpacaPicnic · 04/08/2017 12:17

Awwlookatmybabyspider - nice stealth boast there - I've got a shite two bed semi and a monthly bus pass

Wink before anyone thinks I'm being serious...

And I love those Tiffany earrings. I lost a few minutes daydreaming on their website just now. I wonder if they do rings for very fat fingers...

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