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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to get so bored during the day

124 replies

peachlimeorange · 03/08/2017 13:43

Probably because I am dieting so don't have the 'company' of food!

I wish i could hire someone to talk to sometimes.

OP posts:

Arealhumanbeing · 03/08/2017 18:45

How about volunteering in an elderly person's home. Or for some kind of befriending service for people who feel lonely?

You could literally just sit and chat to someone which is what you actually wanted to do.

Arealhumanbeing · 03/08/2017 18:46

Also as a volunteer you will be able to pick your hours.

Arealhumanbeing · 03/08/2017 18:50

thepumpk1neater

You might be surprised. Have a google. It's so so amazing.

thepumpk1neater · 03/08/2017 18:53

I think I will. Thank you!

Mantasay · 03/08/2017 19:14

Not being able to work because of the cost of childcare I sort of get,

But I don't get how it's possible to feel you've got hours and hours to fill for yourself if you're looking after kids?

iamapixiebutnotaniceone · 03/08/2017 20:03

Endless hours of doing kid stuff IS boring! Especially when there are things that you would love to do just for yourself but can't as the opportunity just doesn't quite present itself! Being bound by everybody else's needs might be a parents job but still sometimes we need something for ourselves too! I totally get this OP!

Original poster

peachlimeorange · 03/08/2017 20:37

I dont think i did say bored but lonely. Or if i am bored it is boredom from not talking to anybody

Some days I dont feel real.

I wont go into my work situation now but take it from me at the moment its impossible.

Voluntary work is abou 3 hours a week. Classes maybe 4. Plus toddler groups are constantly interuppted by toddlers (no shit!) And I am working in my voluntèer work. Also no car right now which adds a layer of difficulty.

I just envy people with networks of family and friends sometimes.

OP posts:

Chattycat78 · 03/08/2017 20:52

I get it OP. I was recently on mat leave in a new area after a house move and it's very lonely. Even after I went to playgroups I couldn't make "proper" friends as I was too busy running around after small children at them. The school holidays are especially tough. How old are your kids?

NanooCov · 04/08/2017 14:35

OP your thread title was about being bored so, yes you did say bored not lonely.

I'm not entertained all day when looking after my child but equally I'm not entertained all day when I'm at work.

Milliemoo37 · 04/08/2017 14:43

What about a good bike ride/walk to explore a new area, make it a bit of an adventure? Especially if you have Pokemon Go on your phone, it's a good distraction. I only have it because my goddaughter is obsessed with it, bless her.

Or you could look at home projects, something like that?

I'm not a sociable person, but if I was, I'd be looking for events happening in my area and seeing which ones I fancy, though most are toddler/baby/tea morning based where I am.

Atenco · 04/08/2017 17:31

OP your thread title was about being bored so, yes you did say bored not lonely

The elephant in this room is so huge

Original poster

peachlimeorange · 04/08/2017 17:34

Sorry, I did yes. Anyway I wont be working any time soon and Im not sure thats the solution in itself.

OP posts:

Caterina99 · 05/08/2017 03:46

To those saying looking after kids isn't boring - everyone is different but I find many parts of being a sahm to a toddler mind numbingly boring. Yes we go to the park - and yes i find it dull! My DS keeps up a running commentary about cars and diggers all day. It's not remotely interesting to me. I can't just ignore him or do something else. Fortunately we do a lot of play dates and groups and things with friends that keep me sane, but I totally get that if OP doesn't have that then she has 10 hours a day to fill but her time isn't really her own so she can't do something she actually enjoys. It can be very lonely and boring if you don't have a good network around you

CheerfulYank · 05/08/2017 04:01

For fucking fuck's sake!

Pardon my French but really?!

I can't really afford to go out to work either. So there. I child mind part time and am transitioning into full time in September as DH has lost his job. (We'll be able to coast on his severance and vacation pay for awhile.)

I'm in America so no free hours of childcare until formal schooling begins at 5. (You can send them to preschool earlier but it doesn't go all day and you have to pay for it.) No benefits of any kind as DH made too high of a salary before.

I didn't finish my degree before but DH did, hence he goes out to work. There is no job I can do around here that would leave anything left over after paying for my two youngest children to be in child care. Added to that there is no school for all of June, July, and August so you've got to either stay home or work out a child care/day camp arrangement til they are old enough to stay alone.

And yes I am bored. I love my kids and am grateful I can stay home. I really like child minding and it's nice to have the parents to speak to at the beginning and end of the day. But I'm an extrovert and sometimes I am horribly lonely without adult conversation.

heron98 · 05/08/2017 05:56

YABU.

I'd love not to work. I hate it!

Do something amazing with your time, you have so many opportunities that people working don't.

CheerfulYank · 05/08/2017 06:35

You'd think Heron but you can't really do as much as you'd like with toddlers in tow.

MrsKoala · 05/08/2017 06:58

Do something amazing with your time

Considering i can't go to the loo alone or shower till another adult is present (not often), i'm not sure what 'amazing' thing having small children allows you to do.

hereforthegin · 05/08/2017 07:00

If you're a SAHM how old are your children? My dd is 3. It is pretty boring but during the day I'm with her so I can't really do anything except parent stuff so I'm not sure what kind of suggestions your after here except groups, park, play dates etc. Then in the evenings I'm stuck in cause my husband works nights so as much as I'd love to go to the gym or have a hobby I can't. I'm not sure where the 8-10 hours per day your trying to fill are coming from? Sorry... not trying to claim your lying or anything just a little confused...

hereforthegin · 05/08/2017 07:04

Ah sorry I missed your update about being lonely not bored. I'm the same, nowhere near friends or family. No advice but you're not alone!

LoniceraJaponica · 05/08/2017 07:07

How old are your children MrsKoala?

I always managed to go to the loo/shower alone when DD was little. I never took her into the bathroom with me to start with, so she never got into the habit of following me there. And I showered at night when she was asleep. DD had medical issues that meant I couldn't leave her with anyone ither than DH, but I still managed to do these two things alone.

MrsKoala · 05/08/2017 07:32

4, 2 and 9 months. I used to be able to shower when i just had ds1. He'd happily go in the jumperoo and we lived in a flat where i could listen out. Then when he was on the move i'd do it when he napped. Then DS2 came along when ds1 was not quite 2 (and showing signs of ASD) and i couldn't leave them alone together and ds1 didn't nap anymore and couldn't be trusted alone. Now we have 9mo DD who is a velcro baby, doesn't nap and screams if you leave the room. DS2 (2) pinches and pokes her if left alone together and the bathroom is 4 floors up so i can't listen out. DH works long hours so i can't shower when he gets home as the sound would wake the kids as would the hairdryer. So i only shower twice a week and wash in the kitchen sink most days.

MrsKoala · 05/08/2017 07:34

3 floors up sorry - 4 flights of stairs tho.

LoniceraJaponica · 05/08/2017 07:38

Ah, OK. That does sound difficult.

I used a playpen for DD when she was little, and it was so practical if I needed to leave the room.

Original poster

peachlimeorange · 05/08/2017 09:45

hereforthegin

Day generally starts at 6 as an approximation. They have breakfast and get one ready for school and one for nursery. Take them there. Then go to a baby group of some kind with the other. Nursery pick up is at 12. That bit is ok. Youngest then sleeps for a bit after lunch.

Then 3 hours pass and the eldest returns from school.

Another 6 hours and husband returns.

Some days are better than others!

OP posts:

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