To think the 'information' the midwife gave me is almost propaganda?

[ethelfleda]

Recently had 24 week appointment. This is our first. Midwife asked if I had thought about feeding yet. I said I plan on breastfeeding. I say 'plan' because (as with everything else baby related) I am trying to keep an open mind as from what I hear, things don't always go according to plan! So I will try hard to breastfeed but I won't beat myself up if it doesn't work out for us.
She handed me a 20 odd page pamphlet thing and said it contained useful information on caring for a new born.

I started to read it today thinking it would be basic NHS info on how to feed, wind and change your baby etc. It was actually 20 odd pages of info telling me basically that if i don't breastfeed, my baby is more likely to develop cancer (as am I) as well as be admitted to hospital in their first year of life etc etc among other very scary statistics.
The language used was shocking IMO! And seemingly designed to make women who don't/can't breastfeed feel awful! Has anyone else had this information handed to them and thought it was way over the top??

Does anyone know if recent research has been done into how many people experience milk delay and/or supply problems? I know the official figure seems to be 2% but there are so many women having babies now who once wouldn't have done (older women, infertility, other health problems, hormone problems, surviving a birth that would once have killed one or both) I can't help wondering if that has an impact too.

Sounds like a horrible cliquey group - very uncomfortable for you, but not vilification. I am not denying you had a bad experience and that the women were totally unpleasant.

Just quibbling with your word!

'And it is very difficult to say on Mumsnet that you had a positive bf experience.'

Not difficult for me to say, I had an easy time. Pot luck though, I was certainly no more 'resilient' then anyone else. My dsis and a couple of friends didn't though. When they voiced their 'guilt' and disappointment it was very easy for me to say it doesn't matter, your dc are thriving, statistics are there for general info, not as sticks to beat new mothers with.

I wonder if all these 'It's sad they don't try! look at the stats!' posters live their lives adhering to all other health advice. Maybe they are able to apply common sense and not disapprove of others that do things differently. Just seems to be other people's babies that some posters think are their business for some reason.

"but have personally experienced a lot of negativity from strangers when ff."

Are you absolutely sure about this? Because I have been out and about a lot with people who are bottle feeding babies and never seen any negativity. And considering how few British women bf, it does seem a bit odd............

Ridingmybike...estimates range from 1% to 20%. I don't think anyone knows a definitive number.

It never ceases to amaze me the amount of attention BF gets in high income countries given its marginal benefits. It has quite literally 0 impact on infant mortality rates, population level obesity (just look at the US!!!)...

BF does have proven benefits over FF but I just don't get the enormous focus on it.

Bertrand certainly a lot of posters seem to feel that you are negatively judging them for FF!

Do you view a woman differently if she chooses to FF?

@RidingMyBike given that in Norway 95% of babies are breastfed at 4 weeks of age (82% exclusively) it feels like that could be a relatively safe figure for women who are physically able to EBF. Of course, of those 18% who aren't exclusively breastfeeding, many will be doing it for reasons that are other than physical (e.g. to allow dad to do night feeds etc). So, a pretty safe upper limit?

Is there a huge focus on it?

I never heard anyone even mention breastfeeding until I got the NHS baby book.

Given the extraordinarily high numbers of women who FF rather than BF in this country, I find it extremely unlikely that all this 'vilification' is going the other way. If so few mothers are even breastfeeding, who exactly is doing it?

Maybe it's like that statistic about how many women are in the room... “If there's 17 percent women, the men in the group think it's 50-50. And if there's 33 percent women, the men perceive that as there being more women in the room than men.”

Bertrand I am definitely sure I experienced negativity when bottle feeding yes. Absolutely. 110%. Certain. Sure.

Well, as NotmyPenguin said- who from????

Because ff are such a huge majority in this country, you must have been incredibly unlucky.

Your attitude is very healthy. Give it your best but if it doesn't work out, you won't beat yourself up into a state of depression.

You could also remind her that the body burden of synthetic chemicals we carry is also passed to the baby in breast milk but little research as been done on it. One day they may say we're giving our babies cancer by breastfeeding them!

Basically you can't win so don't worry what anyone else says.

" It's other mums who judge you for ff. They're the people whose opinion matters to you in the early weeks and months of motherhood"

The vast majority of whom are ff too............

Breast feeding hurt alot felt like contractions again i made the decision I don't want to be bent over crippled in pain while holding a premature baby that was underweight when I was barely producing any milk.

Bertrand.

From

Other mothers at clinic and drop in as already stated

Midwives at clinic as already stated

Hcp at clinic as already stated

BF supporter at drop in at clinic

don't you believe me?

I think this thread is making abundantly clear the need for education in the UK around the benefits of breastfeeding, and the need to support women who do want to!

Mychild- I certainly believe that you had a horrible time and your particular circumstances very understandably made you feel incredibly unhappy and sensitive. And that you met some very tactless HCPs who most certainly should have known better.

I hear a lot of MN about people being 'vilified' for FF, especially at BF cafes, but have other mums really turned round and said lee don't like you because you FF", or is it just an assumption based on your own feelings about feeding? Similarly has anyone ever actually heard the words from a HCP "you've failed your child because you've formula fed"?

As an aside I'm not sure why an exclusive FF parent would go to a BF cafe, I went to a few and found them so helpful, if nothing else to talk about engorgement and problems with others rather than boring the tits off my husband talking to him about it.

I had a very positive experience with breastfeeding. Good advice from midwives at correct holding positions, support from family and DH, never got chucked out of anywhere or funny looks.

When I had to give it up after an illness, I also had a good experience. No-one tried to make me feel guilty, it was great having DH able to take over some of the feeding.

HOWEVER, that doesn't mean that every time someone mentions their own negative experiences that I express disbelief and incredulity that this has happened to anyone else. Everyone's experiences are different, just because I didn't have them doesn't mean that no-one, in the world, ever, has had them either.

Why on earth is it that some posters think that just because they haven't personally experienced something, it doesn't happen? Is everyone on here lying, or exaggerating, because the tones of astonishment that anyone, ever, has been given grief about ff would seem to imply it.

Call me cynical, but there are bastards everywhere who will judge women whatever they do.

There are people who will give a woman shit for breastfeeding because they think that breasts are purely for sexual decoration and shouldn't be seen in public. There are people who will guilt trip an exhausted new mother for bottle feeding because she 'didn't try hard enough'.

These people exist, other people's experiences are real and their own and refusing to believe them is incredibly self-centred.

"The reason people judge ff mothers is because we are fed the lie that anyone can BF if they just try hard enough. Some CAN NOT. And some don't want to. And that's no one's business either!!"

I repeat. Who is doing all this judging when the vast majority of British mothers ff?