AIBU to think nespresso machine not birthday present?

[bootygirl]

DH has asked that I ask if I am BU in thinking that just cos I love coffee and it's my birthday in 2 weeks that coffee maker is suitable birthday present from him? I was buying the €99 one as it's reduced to €70 with free froather when you buy pods for the 'house'.

I said that it's relevant if it's a luxury appliance it's still IMO a kitchen appliance & not a gift for me!
I liked it to me buying him a nice teapot cos he like s tea 😀

So is he right? Please be gentle!

It's up to you but I like to get my hubby presents I really think will improve the quality of his life. These end up being practical gifts that he has never gotten around to buying for himself. I would include a coffee machine in that - unless your hubby is as big a coffee fan as you in which case it's really a special gift for both of you.

Dh bought me a tassimo for my birthday one year and it is one of my favourite presents ever. The difference I guess is that he hates coffee and won't drink it, I love it. So it was definitely a present for me and not something he wanted.

I bought my DH a coffee machine for his birthday many years ago. He loved it.
I don't drink coffee but if he bought me a nice teapot or mug, I'd be very happy with that. I can't see the issue given that he's buying one that you like rather than one that he likes. It's not like he's buying you vacuum cleaner bags or a new iron.

OUR gaggia had stopped working and I was looking for an alternative machine for the house.
When last night he said that could be my birthday present. Yes it is a luxury item. And if I had put it on the list of gifts that he ASKed for I would nt have minded.
All things on my list were under €50 and experiences, some for both of us. I.e. Afternoon tea, meal out, day out for family, cinema trip. I have no problem Sharing a gift.

mycars he wants to pick the upgraded version because he does nt like the base model I had picked.

To me, a present like that is only OK provided the recipient really wants it and the giver won't be using it. Otherwise it's a luxury household purchase IMHO.

I wouldn't want one as the pods are an environmental disaster
I was going to say the same thing. They can't be reused and they aren't easily recycled.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-35605927

Teapots/coffee machines are both good birthday presents IMO. I would liken it to buying someone a Kitchen Aid. Sorry OP but YABU.

I was buying the €99 one..
So this started as you stating that you love coffee, and YOU (singular) had therefore been going to buy a coffee maker...and now (several pages in), its that your old coffee maker broke so you were jointly replacing an existing appliance. That's really quite different, isn't it?

It's a present if you think it is - if you think it is a household appliance, not a present, then it's not a present. It's entirely up to you.

Dh gave me a coffee maker, for my birthday a couple of years ago. I was mourning not having been chosen to test a Nespresso machine for MN, and he suggested a coffee maker as my birthday present - and I thought it was a lovely idea - it suited me perfectly.

I didn't think about the environmental impact of the coffee pods, but chose a drippy-style coffee maker because of the cost of the pods - and because I wanted a lot of coffee that stayed hot.

Sadly my coffee maker died this year, and the new one only keeps my coffee hot for 45 minutes then switches off - presumably due to some directive on energy saving.

I love getting a teapot. Got a kitchen aid one year, love that too.

YABU I have bought my DP a fancy coffeemaker for his last birthday! I don't drink coffee myself but still think it a good gift.
He got me a food processor for Christmas one year because it was something I wanted, though in hindsight I felt a bit weird about that lol. 😆

YABU

Coffee Machine (Tassimo) was top of my Christmas list 2 years back - one of my best gifts ever.

Use it every day.

It's definitely a luxury appliance.

First world problems.....

eggandchip you are right I should have worded the original post better. We are buying one to replace the old one.
I do love coffee but I also love other things which I had asked for such as books.
whataload I was looking at the nespresso as they are now recycling the pods free of charge.
We were looking at pod stdg we are looking at the pod machine as there was nowhere to get our gaggia serviced/repaired. But we both preferred it.

Oh hang on - I've read more.

See I'm the only coffee drinker, so it was most definitely a gift for me.

(I wouldn't have spent £70 on myself like that)

So if he wants the posher version and is using your birthday as an excuse then YANBU

Depends on a lot of factors.

There's women who would be overjoyed to be given a new drilling machine for Christmas.

And I certainly would like a lovely teapot or cup!

If YOU don't want that nespresso machine for a birthday present, he would be unreasonable to give it to you, obviously.

What makes a good present all depends on what the person it is given to wants!

Ours was a house warming gift from PIL ... it is a luxury appliance not a bog standard one

I think that's what upset me the most, DH asked for list, nothing grabby on my list or expensive most of the things were experiences for us all to enjoy... I sent him a link to an offer on nespresso machines as our present machine needs replacing.
Last night he said he was buying it for my birthday and I said I did nt want it for my birthday. He said I was being unreasonable it's a luxury item (I agree that it is). However, luxury household items are usually purchased as our anniversary gift to each other. He has stated that if it is a gift for us both he wants the more expensive one!
I told him that it's the fact that I don't see it as a gift I want that he should except this and buy something off the list he asked for.
He asked me to gather the opinions of Mumsnet and I guess most of the post agree with him.
My favourite mug is my Xmas Cath kitson one that he bought one year!

I agreed with him initially, but the fact that its replacement of a thing you already have jointly makes a big difference in my view.

Its not a new luxury for you, its replacing a broken thing (so, going back to your teapot analogy - not like you buying him a particularly nice teapot, but like you buying him a teapot to replace one yiu'd both been using, that got broken).
I change my view OP - YANBU!

Thanks egg TBF I should have worded it differently in original post

I bought a coffee machine for dh for Christmas. He told me it was one off the best things I'd ever bought him. What if he went on to dadsnet moaning that it wasn't a proper gift because it was for the kitchen. Then all the other dads piled in saying poor him and he's been trying to work out how to tell me.😱

MrsRosa, all DHs are inherently evil, so if he didn't like the machine, its automatically his fault, and if he says anything, he's being abusive ;-D.

You are buying something for yourself and he decided that it's a gift from him?

Sorry not for ourself, the house. Although even if it was for you, it's not from him!

mrsrose he asked me to post this to see if he was right.
gina yes we needed a new machine and I did the research and was buying it and was asking him if he thought it was good value.

I personally think couples who share finances should just get each other little token gifts and have a budgeted amount they can spend on a birthday gift. It's so difficult to get the perfect present even for a loved one, so why waste your family money on something you don't quite prefer.