what age would you let your DC do the following things?

[deliverdaniel]

Trying to work out if IABU

What age would you let your DCs do the following (FWIW mine have no special needs/ unusual circumstances etc)

1. Go to the small park at the end of your own road to play alone or with a friend (safe area, no roads to cross, about 100 feet from the house round one corner)

2. Go to the local shop without an adult (4 min walk with one main road to cross with a pedestrian/ traffic light crossing and no other roads to cross)

3)Walk to school alone or with a friend- 15 minute walk, several side roads to cross but no main road.

All in a safe, quiet-ish suburban area

Thank you!

Agree with Bertrand Russell it's mainly paranoia that's changed not actually the risk to your child. Assuming there are sensible safe places to cross the roads and your children are sensible about roads..

8
6
11

If you Google it (I can't find exact studys ) 10 is considered age they can cross a road but science says it's not until 14 they can fully safely cross a road!!

It's not to do with how sensible the kids are but developmentally when they can judge speed etc.

yeah the park is small and quiet. we live abroad so not a comparable thing in the UK, but like a sweet / garden style park where kids like to play hide and seek with a paved area where they ride bikes and scooters.

We haven't let our DC do any of these things yet (he is nearly 7) but he has been desperately wanting to do some of them, so was trying to get a sense of what people thought were good ages. 11 seems just so old to be the first time you can walk 100 feet out of your own front door without an adult!

8 years of age.

The park - age 5/6
Go to shop - age 7/8
Walk to school - age 7/8
That's if the child wants to. I would probably let a younger sibling do this earlier if sensible and with an older child.

Walking to school alone round here is from Primary 3, 4 at the latest but we are fairly rural. Would be totally different if we lived in a city but that's part of the reason why we live here so the kids can have independence much earlier.

Yes- surely the road thing is different if there is a light/ green man crossing? I think most NT reasonably sensible eight year olds should be able to press the button/ wait for hte green man? Or is that delusional?

I think a busy road would have to have a proper crossing for me to be happy under 11. Interesting what flowerfairylights Says about not being able to judge speed. I will bear that in mind.

I meant without a crossing, judging car speed etc. its much later than you'd think. I think it is different with a crossing.

8

No idea , which doesn't help!

If I applied those scenarios round here then I'd say 12/13 but we live by busy roads, near to a busy centre of shops, supermarkets, pubs and library. The traffic is horrific and the cars often park down both sides of the roads, meaning cars can only get through one at a time but they speed too.

14 people have been knocked over in two years, 3 of them killed which included a 3 year old. There is one crossing but it's not uncommon to see people ignoring the red light and continue on their way and cars never stop at the zebra crossing either.

Cross post there but yes my 6 year old would know to wait for the green man though he hasn't had to yet on his own. Crossing a road by judging the traffic I wouldn't expect him to do for a long time yet

About 7 or 8 for all of them

Same as drinkingtea though DS was 8 when he first went to the shop which included a couple of road crossings. He does "green man crossings" plus a zebra crossing every day on the way to/from school, has done since he was 7. And the road immediately in front of the school has no crossing help but it's a Spielstrasse so something like 5mph speed limit, one way, and swarming with unaccompanied kids at that time. Never heard of any accidents there.

In England we'd probably have waited longer because it's not the norm there.

brittbugs that sounds stressful! yes- would def wait in those circumsntances. it's pretty quiet round here.

I don't live in the uk, 7 is probably the norm. But in the uk it would be 9 or 10, no more danger just different cultural expectations. I don't think I would let my child go alone to a park or playground at any age.

It definitely depends where you live. Our relatives who live in a large city wouldn't let their DC do things until much later than is normal round here. We live in a small, rural town though even the busiest roads are normally 30mph speed limits and people do stop at red lights and zebra crossings!

8-10. -depending on the child.Don't really see huge difference between these activities.

7, 8, 8

Hmm. We are in London and whilst it's not too bad there is a road to cross to get to the park and despite it being a narrow residential road with cars parked on either side, cars can hurtle down it like fucking loons. And school don't allow kids to walk alone till year 5. So, park/shop - 8 or 9?

Not delusional op.
My things are

Is the kid sensible.
Can they retain and respond to instructions.
Can they outline how they would get out of sticky situations.( nasty kids, stranger approaching).

So basically my dd could do all this at 8, or before. Ds not till a year or so later

I would say 11 for the park and 15 minute walk with lots of crossings. Short walk to the shop - maybe 8? We have a big green area near us too but mine don't go there alone as there are bigger children hang around and it makes me nervous.

They tend to play in gardens - either here or at friends, we regularly have 6 or 7 kids in our garden - that is how I like it!

Just read your update. My 5 and 7 year old go to the park at the end of our road. The rule is that if there's other children playing they can stay but if there's no one there they have to come home or play on our street.

I'd do that if I had a big garden!!!

To add - my 11 year old has a 45 min journey (30 min walk, 15 min bus) to secondary from Sept. That would be a big ask if he hadn't started goung out and about before now.