Do you ever wish you had someone else's child?

[kittapie]

My mother said to me that she wishes she does. She says I'm not normal because I'm not loud and extroverted.

I just feel sad.

My dm used to remind she was supposed to move away to start a new job but got stuck with me instead. .
Having a nice dm is a nice idea in theory. .

Nc for 17 years. .
Life is much better.

That's a very hurtful thing to say, even if she meant it lightheartedly. Didn't want to read and run.
That's a lot more to life than being loud and extroverted and I'm sure you're lovely just as you are.

Wtf! No!! That's very mean of her. Poor you OP. She's talking out her arse. I love my son so much, I can't understand the rationale behind telling you this other than to be horrid.

That is a horrible thing for her to say.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with not being loud or extroverted. I'm sorry your mum doesn't appreciate you for who you are, but it says more about her than it does about you.

She is the one with the problem. Who says that to their own child?

That is a vile thing for her to say to you, OP. Don't feel sad, this says a lot about your mother and nothing about you. x

That's such awful thing to say. So unkind. I really feel for you.

Each of us is born to be the unique individual that we are.
It's not a competition, where we have to try to match up to some fantasy of what a "perfect" or "successful" or "popular" person is.

Each parent is lent the precious gift of a child. If they're too stupid to appreciate the gift that you are, well, their loss.

It's fine to be an introvert. Or an extrovert. We are who we are.

No I don't want someone else's child.

But I wish I had a better relationship with my own child.

What a dreadful thing to say to your child. She sounds very shallow and ignorant.

Generally, I am very relieved I don't have anyone else's child - except when it comes to food. Then I often wish it!

She wanted a "loud" child? She considers loudness and extroversion desirable traits?

How embarrassing for her.

I do.

Seriously, what an awful thing for your DM to say!

I imagine that sometimes you wish you had someone else's mother OP. Because other people's mothers don't say unnecessary hurtful insulting things to their children. Sorry your mum is a dickhead.

And in answer to your question, no I don't. I have a child with significant speech and communication problems and I love her to bits, I wouldn't change her for the world but I would change the world for her if I could.

What was the context of the conversation?

That is a vile thing for her to say to you, OP. Don't feel sad, this says a lot about your mother and nothing about you.
^ This, completely.

Do I wish that they would tidy up after themselves? yes. Listen to me? yes. I would never wish to replace either of my children because of their personalities. They put up with my personality and failings like I put up with theirs, it's what makes us "us".

Oh Op, I don't doubt that you are hurt but this isn't a loving Mother's response to a child. You deserve so much better.

Sparklingbrook I wasn't smiley enough at a big social event. I have anxiety. I'm 22.

I'd reply with and I wish I had a different mother who was tactful and loving but hey here we are 🙄

That's horrible. YY to saying you wish you had an understanding mother who was a bit more supportive.

I wonder if your hurtful unkind mother and your anxiety are related somehow.

OP, it's taken me until I'm 30 to accept my mother is emotionally abusive - don't let it take you that long please!
You deserve better!!!!

OuchBollocks yes, this is true for me! Anxiety was very much provoked and driven by horrible mother. Counselling helped me A LOT!!!!

It is normal to be quiet and normal to be loud. A loving mother should get to know her own children and appreciate them for who THEY are.

I have one of each btw and both lovely!

She is an absolute bitch to say that to you. Sorry if that's harsh because it's your mother OP but I think she is. That's an appalling thing to say. I hope you aren't too affected by it. Please look into counselling for yourself and distance yourself far away from that thing (again, sorry, but I'm angry on your behalf) as possible.

Wow. I can see why you have anxiety. What a horrid thing to say. The issue is her. Not you. You know that right?

Poor you op having such a nasty DM. Rest assured there is nothing wrong with your personality and everything wrong with hers. The world is not just for extroverts it's for all of us to share and find our place. Pity her and love yourself op