To expect baby group to be open during the holidays

[PeggyPatchandPoppy]

I live in the countryside and I'm fairly isolated. I have a newish baby and enjoyed going to baby group 3 days a week. I didn't particularly have any friends there but enjoyed the process of going somewhere different to the village shop and talking to different people.
The groups finish this week because it's the end of term. That means that me and DD have no where to go to interact with other parents. The library clubs have always stopped for half term so we are really stuck for things to do.
I know there are reasons the clubs can't run during term time E.g. Parents have to older children they need to do activities with. Am I being unreasonable in thinking they could keep at least one club a week going?

I used to run a toddler group, and Blefast has explained well why we didn't run over the holidays.

However, whilst these groups stop over the summer, another type of activity tend to kick in. These are one-off activity days/sessions run by museums, parks, National Trust properties etc. with activities aimed at toddlers. Ones around here range from bug hunts to crafting activities etc. Also swimming clubs would do things like a week-long intensive swimming session, where you would come in for half an hour every day.

OK so it won't be the same group of people, but you can chat to other families and volunteers and feel a bit more sociable, and it will give you an plan for that day - I found having some of of itinerary for the week and a reason to get out of the house really helped. You just need to tap into your local summer holiday 'calendar'!

Sorry Belfast - don't know what I was trying to call you there

Why not start your own group?

The children centre where I live runs all year round (apart from this week and a week at Christmas) and is free to go to.

I thought that one week of it closed was hard, not sure what i'd do if it closed all summer.

My mum jointly runs a weekly playgroup/ tea and tots thing. They close during school holidays, because otherwise parents turn up as normal with their babies and toddlers.... and bring their school age children. There is not the space, facilities and supervision for the older, extra children and simply asking people not to bring them has never worked. So they just no longer run the group in the holidays.

It annoys me that some people seem to expect others to create entertainment for them and their children. It's childish and the kind of attitude I would expect from my 6 yo. If you're a grown adult you should be responsible for developing your own social life. Great, if clubs/groups are available to help with that, but to moan when 'other people' don't arrange these things for you to your liking is rather entitled, parasitic even. Take responsibility for yourself, and be the solution to your problem!

To be fair WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup I've seen that 'why not start your on group' statement on here a few times and it's really not that easy. You need a venue (likely at a cost) insurance, advertising, training, volunteers, etc; all of which would take several weeks to organise. And then after all that most women now go back to work at the end of their maternity leave and then may not have time to run the group anymore.

I used to run a toddler group 5-6 years ago, and I agree with you OP.
The first thing I did when I took over was stop the group closing on half-term weeks as a start.
When summer came, we arranged a programme of activities at the same time as the group would have been running (in our case, 9-12 Friday morning)
We had both a good weather (park) and a bad weather (soft play, musuem etc) option, and gave every parent a full list of where we were meeting every Friday, dry and wet weather, cost (although we usually managed no cost if the weather stayed dry) and a list of contacts in case people wanted lifts.
Because we were pout and about, it meant that people could bring their older children along with them, and stay as long as it suited them.
It worked really well for a couple of years and I have some very happy memories of whole days spent in the park with people who actually became good friends over the summer.
It started to break down when people started to want to change the pre-arranged schedule (which I did not allow because we had publicised it in advance) and there was always someone who wanted to go somewhere expensive, which excluded some people from the day.
It's probably too late to organise this now, but if there is a social media page for the group, you could always float the idea there?

YABU
This may be the only chance the volunteers have to have a break, or they may have no childcare to cover them.

Why don't you contact some of the other Mums and arrange to meet up with them?

It used to annoy me as well. All the toddler groups stopped, even the postnatal group for mums with babies under six months. If you know the other parents, it's worth suggesting getting together in the school holidays.

Kit it can be done though. Nothing worth doing is easy! I guess it stings a bit that people don't consider us volunteers need a break. I'm currently running 2 support groups and volunteering at 2 charities as well as being on 2 PTA's. I have a 10 week old baby, my fourth. I'm really looking forward to spending time with my family in the school holidays. I'll be eating to go again in September!

Raring, even

Tbf, the OP has said that she's willing to host a group in her own home, though it sounds like she will be stepping out of her comfort zone.Those criticising her should read the thread and maybe offer her some constructive tips?

Nothing worth doing is easy

I beg to differ, I just ate a bar of dairy milk and that was incredibly easy.

OP, I'm with you. This massively affected me - my daughter was born at the end of the term, had some health issues which took up all our time for the first 7 weeks, and by the time that was sorted everything had stopped. And it wasn't just 6 weeks - it seems things stopped several weeks before the end of term, and didn't get going for some time after either. So it was more like 10-12 weeks. Groups only started up again three weeks after I was back at work FT (I took our enhanced package of 4 months high rate mat leave, but had to return to work as the sole earner - SMP wouldn't cover the mortgage).

Get together with Mums on your own? What Mum? How are you supposed to meet them if there are no groups?

And for those berating OP for not volunteering - so, she was expected to start volunteering for Mum & baby groups before she had her first child? I, in fact, felt so strongly about my poor start that I now volunteer at a once-a-month weekend group, despite being disabled and this taking up a full 50% of my "excess" activity budget (outside of work and feeding the family - so any trips to playgrounds, to the store, spending time organising the house, etc.). This was the only place I could go as a working Mum, and I feel very strongly that it is important to keep it going, even when others keep suggesting we "shut down" for the holidays. But it's not like you can start out like that, can you? All of this is alien territory to a new Mum and only by these groups can someone begin to even get involved.

Furchester

I'm sorry but I said in my first post that I know why it happened Slothmama and Coconut.

Also I do not expect people to entertain my baby for me. She is 12 weeks so it is hardly difficult to for me to keep her entertained. I liked having an hour of adult company a week.
PLUS I have invited people to my house and suggested we meet at the local park. I don't have Facebook so it is tricky to arranage things.

Most things close down during the summer holidays, city or country, because lots of people go on holiday!

If you had Facebook then you'll find alot of stuff listed on there if you reach out for the connections. Worth considering?

Many things close down for the summer, but 'new mum' stuff is one that is particularly useful to remain open... Everything where I was closed down, including all NHS and charity-run BF-support (because, clearly, anyone who has a baby during the summer doesn't need help establishing BF ). I was then out-aged when things started up again, like baby massage, as they said they gave 'preference' to mothers with babies less than 4 months old and had filled up. But they didn't allow until 6 weeks old, and my baby reached 4 months before they restarted!

If effort is made to keep some things going, those targetting new mums are the thing to go for, I think.

Lots of baby clubs close over school holidays because a lot mums and volunteers would need to bring older siblings with them.

Having run clubs like this that's a bad combination
Seems it's the 'accepted normal' to stick to term times

Yes they tend to close because they rely on volunteers. Volunteers who are either going on holiday, or because they have their own school age kids to look after. Also there is less demand over the holidays, which makes it hard to justify paying staff for small numbers attending.

Check out NCT coffee groups in your area. They often keep going over the summer. You don't need to be a member of NCT/High income/wear Boden/Shop at Waitrose.

I think it's the fact that you said you were ANNOYED that they are stopping for the holidays which.....annoys people. It smacks of being totally self centred and not having an appreciation of other people's lives and the fact that not everyone is at the same point as you - off work, with one small baby and a yearning for adult company.

People have mentioned all the reasons why groups stop over the summer and why they usually actually need to stop and just wouldn't be viable. Many of those volunteering or even being paid have older kids that cannot be fought along to such groups and which understandably those parents want to spend time with. And of course it's when most parents go on holiday and usually the number of volunteers or workers isn't enough to cover the absences. These things alone make it pretty obvious why regular stuff tends to run on a termly basis.

However as others have said, other stuff starts - it's more one-off than regular, but NT places have events as do many garden centres or leisure centres etc. It's easy to find out about and you can simply ask a couple of other mums if they fancy it. You just need to think ahead a bit and ask people at the last session of the organised term time things you go to. And actually, when you do this and invite people to go to things with you, that's when you start to build proper friendships with other mums, in a way you can't when you just see them for half an hour or an hour ar a weekly paid event.

Sorry, but you have to take some responsibility for your social life and put some effort into it. It's no ones job to provide you with activity 52 weeks a year. You will find there are loads of things going on that you can go to. Be brave and ask those casual acquaintances you've made if they'd like to meet up. They might become your best mates.

And isn't this why people join the NCT - you've automatically got your group of people for the holidays. My DH always called it 'rent a friend' - but having said that, we are all still friends years later!

I went to baby groups largely run by paid staff and it was the same for me.

I was lucky enough to have an easy birth and a "content" baby, so by week 3 I was eager to just get out of the god damn house and see people, anyone! Especially as I was taking time off from a very full on full time job. I felt claustrophobic and anxious with my summer born, to a point I would just invent housework to do, whilst baby happily slept!

I can only imagine that the groups I attended, my set of circumstances where probably not the intended target audience, in the nicest possible way.

A lot of the activities and clases they offered was around basic cooking, cleaning etc, on top of the "stay and plays" and there was a lot of struggling families that attended, lots with the supervision of social services. About 95% had older children too, and they wasn't allowed to bring them to groups, was on low income or didn't work, so I guessed they just didn't think the turn out was great so closed.

Despite, what appears above as a dim view of the groups, I throughly enjoyed the groups, and made life long friends with lots of the parents there.

We took up swimming, just ask your GP if you can go. I believe it's the mothers health not babies (despite popular believe re jabs) that matters, we was going as early as 6 weeks.

I also met up with the friends I met from the groups in coffee shops, parks, etc. And even created a walking group x