to think schools are making too many demands on parents

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...for time and money. I've had three texts this week about concerts, assembly and two demands for donations towards a beach area in the playground. I'm feeling totally overwhelmed by the weekly events during the day which you're texted about and chased by the Class rep to attend I work from full time form home so I have some flexibility but it's too much. The fundraising is another issue as they are always asking but it's not for essential things like books - an outdoor beach play area is the latest. How do you cope? One Mum said she doesn't engage with it at all but I struggle with the guilt.

Blame the government not the school

The concerts, assemblies etc are more right now because it's the end of the school year. You won't be the only parent who can't make it.

The requests for donations, well I hope you didn't vote Tory, because they have cut school budgets to the bare bones and continue to do so. So anything extra has to be funded by donations.

Ignore what you don't want to help with but schools are in a dreadful position financially so it won't go away.

And 'non essentials' are to improve yours and everyone else's DC's even if you don't think they are needed. Do you live miles away from the sea? Maybe they are showing children who never get to the beach what it's like?

I umderstand. I understand why the schools are asking for donations too. The trouble is when the parents don't have the spare money or it's the wrong time of the month.

As for the assemblies yes I completely understand but you won't be the only one who is struggling to get to all of them. It just feels that way! This year it's just the normal stuff but last year the year 6 celebrations nearly broke me as I was trying to split myself in 3 to accommodate it all. Only a week to go now op

The problem with the funding for education is too much goes towards teachers' pensions just like in the NHS leaving schools hoping parents will pick up the shortfall.

You really want your child to have an impoverished education that you don't have to be engaged with? I'd rather that mine didn't, even though I can't always contribute time or money and can't always attend.

There are also so many kids that need suppport and the funding isn't there - everything is stretched.

I think more deaths happen to children who live away from the sea - as they aren't aware of the dangers - are you central?

Of course user- making sure teachers have no pensions at all will ensure you have the best people teaching your dc . There have been huge changes in the TPS which mean the state is paying less and teachers paying more- at least have your facts straight...

OP School funding has been massively cut at a time of increasing numbers. Unfortunately this means that schools will ask for more help. However no school would expect donations if you can't afford them- pay if you can/ want to otherwise ignore.

The assemblies etc are end of year activities as pps have said- again attend what you can/ want to but don't feel under pressure. Many parents will be unable to attend.

It's a rock and a hard place. But overall it's still cheaper and less time consuming than home schooling and as it's my responsibility that they get educated I guess I have to run with it.

The mum who doesn't engage with it has the right approach. Go to what you want to, don't go to what you don't/can't.

And a donation is just that - it's not a demand with menaces. Ignore it if you don't wish to contribute. It sounds like something "nice" rather than something essential.

Why feel guilty? You can only do/contribute what you can!

Schools do overwhelm parents with information and requests, but they're stuck between a rock and a hard place - they need to raise money because they don't have enough. They also need to try to engage the broader community for the benefit of the school and the children. Some parents can and do attend every event and every concert and every prize giving. Others don't. But you have to tell them about each and every one.

I wish there was a better way for schools to do this without overwhelming the parents, but few have found it yet. In the meantime, glance at things and bin all those you can't help with or aren't interested in.

None of that is compulsory though. Go to what you can, donate to what you, don't worry about what you can't.

What an amazing school and what amazing teachers to be willing to put so much time and effort into making the end of year so special for your child.
It's a bit worrying that you are struggling after three texts and two requests for donations and feel totally overwhelmed, that's not exactly a big deal. Maybe you should remember that school budgets have been cut like never before, schools are having to cut everything but basic resources so you are going to be asked for A LOT more next year, teachers pay has been held at below inflation for years and pensions have been slashed while teacher donations to these have been increased, accademy rules have left teachers without pay and conditions, class sizes are increasing and funding for Sen provision has been changed and in such reduced and teachers are leaving in their drones so to put it frankly I don't think at all you are being asked a lot of and actually I think you should be amazingly greatful to the staff and the home school society who are working so hard to make your child's schooling enjoyable and engaging rather than just doing the minimum.

Can't see the problem. The school is making you aware of events going on. You either attend or don't. Better that you are informed of the event so that you can make that decision rather than find out that xyz event happened at school from another parent and that was something you wanted to attend.
Similarly, with the request for donations, you're not compelled to so either you do or don't; but seeing as the benefit would be to your child/ren (as well as others obviously), I can't see the issue, at least the taxpayer picks up the bulk of the costs in state schools.

I know what you mean OP, it does seem there is rather a lot going on at this time of year. Unfortunately the donation requests are becoming a necessity due to lack of finding. I just donate what I can and ignore the rest.

Schools can't win.
Blame the government(s).

And yes all the money is going into teachers' pockets . Must be why teaching is sooo popular at the moment and there's no recruitment crisis at all. Nope, definitely not.

I have had to sell my car recently to cope with the endless requests for money - it sounds absolutely bonkers, but it's true.

We've had monetary requests so far in past two months:

• Summer fair fundraiser - £20 and 4 hours
• Year 6 residential trip - £180 and endless meetings of what to take
• Mandatory school uniform with school logo on for high school (if you don't have this and they get sent home as per parent-school agreement) £130
• High school open evenings/ days with information spread out to ensure parents attend (and spend) - 3 and counting
• Basics for school uniform (polo shirts/skirt/coat/shoes/bag/stationery) £120
• Summer holiday activity week to transition to high school (not mandatory but pressured to attend) £100 - Year 6 leaver's prom - £25 (dress/shoes/accessories to fit in not included)
• Year six leaver's jumper for their final presentation + assembly £20

Just added that up and now feel sick - none of these are luxurious items and none of them are things I can get out of - these are without the usual PTS emails about donations or cake sales or raffle tickets or souls of first born children and come September there'll be even more costs with the first high school association activity the second week in with a family BBQ and costs to attend that - never mind the bloody extra uniform we'll have to purchase.

Possibly slightly off topic here, OP, so apologies, just the thought of schools at the moment makes me feel sick - the cost is phenomenal and I know I'm not the only parent who'll be struggling - it just seems more and more demands are made both financial and time.

Just to add, I have a HUGE appreciation for schools and teachers and I know the PTA play a great part in fundraising, but I do wish they'd stop clearing my account out.

I'm fully aware of budget cuts and vote left wing but my point is that I'm not sure our donations are supporting the essentials and I'd rather give to books than a sandpit! They exert pressure through things like MUFTI days or school outings and it's from the kids, daily texts (13 in one day was the record) to the class rep nagging people daily on facebook or in person. I'm so over it, I can't wait for term to end and many of fellow parents feel the same way. My parents came into school for parents' night and school concert and that was it. I'm going to have to grow a thicker skin and take your advice to ignore more!

I'm surprised you feel this way given that you work.
On a given day I probadly receive 50 emails in my inbox and I have an endless list of tasks including some with big asks where I have to sit and review and write detailed documents that can take hours. I just get on with it. I don't see a couple of texts a week a big deal at all given that those tasks are small and generally quick fix.

You need better coping mechanisms

If you can't go to the events, then don't go. The children and school staff will have worked very hard on the various productions and events, which all goes to support the enrichment and diversity of the children's education. These events don't take place in a bid to piss you off in the most time-consuming and exhausting manner possible, they're done for the children's benefit and the children like to share with their families. That said, nobody will judge you if you're not able to go.

Schools are going to have to become increasingly blatant about asking parents for money- the slashing of school budgets is going to have an increasingly negative impact over the next few years, particularly for children with additional needs. Enrichment and practical activities are likely to fall by the wayside when teachers can no longer afford to fund the required consumables out of their own pockets, which is what often happens now.

Just to add that I am fully aware of the pressure on teachers and this is not about their dedication at all. But I do think there is a balance to be struck and have full sympathy to whatpardonwhat for the financial pressures you're feeling at the moment. We all know that it's hard to refuse a child's request to go on a school trip. I mooted the idea of our donations helping form a fund for this kind of thing which the school could allocate but was met with resistance.

Apparently parents demand classes of less than 200, rooves over buildings, books written less than 100 years ago

Schools dont have a lot of money but have many demands that cost a lot

And if you're concerned about the impact of budget cuts, then please do consider contacting your MP, or the secretary of state for education, or the PM. Headteachers desperately need parents of school children to understand the underlying issues here.

So many TAs are leaving from our school not because they want to, but school can't afford them.
All the contributions are for children to have better education. Do what you can, and don't if you can't.