Or just incredibly spoiled?

[Neoflex]

Sorry in advance for the epic post.

My husband and I have 2 anniversaries: the day we signed the papers and the day we had the party.

For party anniversary, husband wanted to go back to where we got married, which is his home country. I did not want to travel because I am 4 months pregnant but he persuaded me as it would be a nice holiday. So far it hasn't turned out that way.

1. he decided we would do a detour to the city where he went to uni so he could see friends. I am not a fan of said city and protested but he promised it would just be a couple of nights then we could have 2 weeks at the beach.

2. husband booked us on Ryanair flight even though he knows my one principle in life which is to never fly Ryanair.

3)) I wanted to stay at a hotel but he wanted to stay with friends. Those friends canceled so we had to end up staying with other friends who do not have a guest-suitable flat. It has no doors between rooms. It is 30 degrees with no air conditioning. No curtains on the windows. The bathroom is between the two rooms so you have to disturb each other if you need to pee. And the room where we are sleeping is full of junk that I keep tripping over to turn on the light. One other thing that doesn't bother me but will have mumsnetters nickers in a twist: they are growing cannabis on their balcony.

4. we ended up spending our actual anniversary in this city. Where by the way taxis do not have seat belts and drive like maniacs so getting to the restaurant was dicing with death. But the meal was fantastic and thought this could save the day

5. after meal went for lovely little walk through city and I was ready for bed but husband wanted to go to a festival where friends were. I agreed to go for a but wanted to go home early

6. arrived and sat in warm spot on a hill far from crowd. Listened to music and watched sunset. Was nice. Then friends call who are sat close to stage and want us to move there. I want to stay put. He wants to move. Of course he gets his way again and we move, but on condition we won't stay long

7. get there. It's wet and noisy and I'm pretty annoyed. Then husband gets call from friend who had come to meet us on hill, asking where we were.

8. drunk friend from hill slips and seriously injures himself on his way to find us. Passer by helps friend who tells him to call my husband for help.

9. husband and a friend, call him Ted, go to help and there i am sat with this teds wife who I don't know and can barely speak English for 3 whole hours. It's cold, it's wet, I'm pregnant and tired.

10. Ted returns but not my husband. Apparently my husband went to the hospital with drunk friend who needs surgery for a broken leg. Doesn't call me just sends his friend to tell me. They will take me back to the place I am staying once I am ready to go home.

11. husband gets back at 3 in morning. He is clearly tired from the ordeal and still sleeping 10 of clock today even though we were meant to be getting up and leaving this shit hole bright and early today. I'm sat here sweating hungry and extremely pissed off in someone else's flat just waiting for him to wake up.

Aibu or has he ruined our anniversary and do I have the right to be so ffff* angry right now? Or should I be grateful he tried to celebrate our anniversary at all? And I mean what could he do. Just leave his injured friend?

I think the 'full cost' is referring to the way Ryan Air treat their staff Will. As referenced by the mention of how they treat them and comparing them to Uber. No need to be so rude with your IQ of a potato comment!

It sounds miserable but you have allowed it. Your entire post is about how you didn't want to do something but like a sheep went along. Why?

I think you're a saint for putting up to this to this point to be honest. There's no way I would stay in a flat without doors with no privacy or go to a festival with people I couldn't communicate with when pregnant. It sounds like absolute hell and your DH is selfish for continually pushing your boundaries when he knew his pregnant wife was uncomfortable and distressed. I hope you get out of there soon.

Just the ones with a bit of sense, perhaps.

^which was a reply to that:

Being pregnant doesn't mean that every mumsnetter will be on your side

Well we have just spent one hour in the jacuzzi (yes I know they tell you not to) and my Dh did admit he has not really thought about how me being pregnant has changed things. We've been backpacking round India Asia etc. and I wasn't much of a moaner so he's been a bit surprised by my outburst of rage. He has admitted he has been selfish and I have overreacted so all is fine... for now.
Lol as for lyingair I am standing my ground no budging there. Even on the way here we had a moan about being sat apart even though there were spare seats all around us and the hostess said "love this is Ryanair what do you expect." And when we tried to move told we had to pay to move into an empty seat. Come on guys cut me some slack i don't have a car, i ride the bus, sometimes bike in the rain , would pick up a hitchhiker, but I do not do Ryanair. Just accept.

PS going to enjoy some technology free days now but please feel free the "too rich to Ryanair " debate without me

You should have put your foot down about staying in the flat.
Once checked me in advance Algerian and made me pay to change it
I have no idea what this means.

Well when my A is about halfway between Leeds and Manchester there's a damn sight more Ryanair flights at any price than there is BA to just about anywhere in Europe which is generally where I want to go.

You don't do Ryanair? How did you get there then? How are you getting home.
You do ryanair.

What I do know is that it is really, really hard living in a different country from your family, your friends and your entire culture

This was my first thought too.

It sounds to me like your husband really wanted to see his friends, family and culture, a d for you to be there too. The mistake was in thinking your anniversary would be a good time to do this as you obviously want to enjoy that yourself and you clearly don't enjoy things in his home town in the same way he does.

How often does he go home? Is it always with you or does he go on his own sometimes? I live in DPs country with him, and more of my trips back home are without him than with. To be honest I feel more free to enjoy myself when he doesn't come (as there's no pressure on me to make sure he understands everything and is having fun) but I'd be sad if he NEVER came, as he is a huge part of my life and I want my family and friends to know him and for him to know my family, friends and the country and culture that made me who I am.

I don't like the budget airlines either, I am with you OP on this one.

So husband wanted to combine a boys trip with your anniversary trip. Next time, let him go on a boys trip and save your anniversary trip for just you too. Can you not just tell him that you will meet him at the hotel near his Dad's in a few days as you are:
a) hot, uncomfortable and fed up of shared spaces
b) disappointed this trip seems to have been all about him and not about the two of you.
Grab a taxi/bus/train and get the hell out of there!

She went Ryanair solely because her husband booked it in spite of her, if you read the OP.

I don't do Ryanair either or EasyJet, it's not worth the hassle.

You sound a bit princessy tbh. If it's that bad just book yourself into s hotel for a few nights?

The hostess said "love this is Ryanair what do you expect."

Did she really say that?!

I can't fault Ryan Air personally. Had nothing but great experiences with them. I always pay the extra for guaranteed seats and priority boarding. Staff have always been polite.

Now Airfrance on the other hand were awful.

I'm quite glad there are so many people who can't see past blind snobbishness to rationally assess the product offered by Ryanair, Aldi, Skoda etc because it reduces demand for the rest of us who are generally happy with what they offer.

If I want to travel to Europe from an airport within 100 miles of my home address then it is with Ryanair, Monarch, Jet2 etc. I'm not trekking 200 miles to Heathrow etc so I can use BA.

I think YABU about most of it although I can understand you not wanting to stay with those friends.
You should have insisted you stayed in a hotel.
As for Ryanair we often use them and it has been fine. It might have been the only airline doing that route or the most convienent one.
DH has used BA recently and he found the crew very arrogant also now have to pay for hold bags and there is no longer free food. So really the same as the cheap airlines

lulz @ 'blind snobbishness', no it was too many shit experiences.

Wtf an airline has to do with a supermarket and a car brand I don't know. Aldi is great, Skoda are supposedly reliable - they're both totally irrelevant.

OK it's ages since I was pregnant but is life that different when you're 4 months? Morning sickness aside (and I'm certain the OP would have mentioned that) I'm pretty sure I was carrying on as normal at that point.

Not that it makes much odds if the OP is having a shit time. Just curious why the pregnancy aspect is being given so much significance in the responses.

You sound like such hard work! Tad spoilt and rather controlling.

What if the flat gets raided for the cannabis? I'd be too scared to stay there - you would be implicated - you should go home, now!

I thought you were being a bit unreasonable about all but the RyanAir thing. Their website definitely aims to trick people - try booking a flight priced in euros ! Glad you have made up though.

I too hate Ryanair.... mainly because their boss treats passengers with contempt ( amongst other reasons). I pay more to travel with other airlines but since my view, and that of the OP has zero impact on what anyone else does hardly think it warrants all these comments here.

OP I think it's natural that your DH will want to go and visit his friends since he lives abroad. Chalk this one up to experience and maybe in the future he should fly ahead and spend a few days with his friends and then you could join him for the more fun bit. That way you don't feel so much resentment about using annual leave on a holiday you don't really want to take.

Your DH is a selfish child. You need to stick up for yourself. And to those saying being pregnant makes no difference get a grip! Everyone handles pregnancy different. Some are still very sick at 4months and some are very tired. OP it's time you grew some balls. Life will treat you this way if you let it happen.